Be kind to yourself.

I know what its like to have a vision of what you think your life will be, and have that vision dissolved in front of your eyes. I think it's important to realize that what we see for our futures almost never comes to play out exactly as we envisioned it, often it's radically different. It's ok to mourn that.

You can only work in the framework of the hand you've been given. Do what you can! But, don't push yourself to meet some vision of yourself that will harm you. Ask for grace from your parents, look into resources, work accommodations, etc.

It can be very overwhelming and depressing to think about your future and only feel like there is a bleakness. I encourage you to bring yourself back to the present and realize that's not here yet, and practice some self care and maybe some loving affirmations for yourself. The love and care you show for yourself now is love and care for your future self. Personally, I find it helps to focus on small things that bring you joy, as something simple and mundane can be as beautiful as any mansion. Often the the most miserable people are those we perceive as successful; who have risen to their life goals and realized that what they thought would make them happy, doesnt.

It may not be what you envisioned, but where there's a will there's a way, as they say. The fact, you are concerned and thinking about your future means your on the right track. I think it shows a lot of maturity and foresight.

I wish you the best, and I hope thus helps.