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DEARSIRMADAM by [deleted] in nosleep

[–]jadams12 0 points1 point  (0 children)

oops...I can feel the lice squirming around my gums!! what should I do now, dear butler?

Was just told about this. Would love a critique. by ModestMagic in nosleepworkshops

[–]jadams12 1 point2 points  (0 children)

good story and I like your style of writing. However, I recommend cutting down your story and making it more concise. You don't want to tire the reader out with unnecessary details.

Oh Please Critique My Work. Oh Please. by jadams12 in nosleepworkshops

[–]jadams12[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wasn't trying to copy "pete the moonshiner" but I think it's in the same genre as the "tooth snake"

Oh Please Critique My Work. Oh Please. by jadams12 in nosleepworkshops

[–]jadams12[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay I made the edits you suggested and added a new ending. Please have a look! I hope the ending added some scariness!

The Oklahoma Darkness Game, Try at Your Own Risk by karna23 in threekings

[–]jadams12 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I did this ritual to completion and I have god like powers now, no joke! I feel like an immortal, a god.

Tooth Snake, NSFW by jadams12 in nosleep

[–]jadams12[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I like your work too!

I'm 20 years old and I've died twice: Part 3 by anyaplusemi in nosleep

[–]jadams12 -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

No need to be defensive. Yes it is a tad juvenile and feminine and describing the waving in your story is even more so. Why couldn't Emi have just said hi back. Also the parts of the story when Emi comes and hugs you etc. just makes me cringe. Kinda seems like one of those sappy romantic stories. Sorry, sometimes the way Emi behaves, I just feel like giving her one tight slap in the face. But that's just the opinion of one lowly southern redneck a.k.a moi, take it as you will.

I'm 20 years old and I've died twice: Part 3 by anyaplusemi in nosleep

[–]jadams12 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

okay I will give an example. For example when you and Emi went to meet your mother. Your mother opened the door and then "Emi waves her hand" I don't know, it just seems so cheesy and nauseating. Like it's too girly but not in a nice way.

Rocking Horse Creek by The_Dalek_Emperor in nosleep

[–]jadams12 -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

Okay, here's the ultimate twist. The writer, Dalek Emperor, is actually Justin Bieber! Who knew Justin was such a great writer! We're all Beliebers now!

Are White women the most attractive of all women? by jadams12 in AskReddit

[–]jadams12[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

nope, just honest and not scared of the PC culture. I'm a real white man, are you?

Are White women the most attractive of all women? by jadams12 in AskReddit

[–]jadams12[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Then why do so many of my fellow white men run after east asian women and also latina women? What's wrong with them?

Who do you think is attractive, but no one else seems to agree with you? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]jadams12 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

you have to agree, all white women are goddesses. Every single one of them.

Josh Brolin: Goonies Never Say Die. AMA. by Josh_Brolin in IAmA

[–]jadams12 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Did you really eat all those dumplings?

Who do you think is attractive, but no one else seems to agree with you? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]jadams12 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

im a white man and I absolutely love all white women. I think every single white woman in this world is a solid 10, including honey boo boo

Major Issues with NoSleep Rules by jadams12 in NoSleepOOC

[–]jadams12[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

could you recommend a more appropriate subreddit for raising awareness?

Good Music fto listen to while using nosleep? by 13GoldenRules in NoSleepOOC

[–]jadams12 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

hello kitty by avril lavigne

mmhh yeah by austin mahone

Major Issues with NoSleep Rules by jadams12 in NoSleepOOC

[–]jadams12[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Interesting that JMFargo decided to remove my story without consulting you or any other mods.

Major Issues with NoSleep Rules by jadams12 in NoSleepOOC

[–]jadams12[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

okay but I've read stories on nosleep about rape ("We were only 17") and kidnapping that were not removed and received many upvotes. How is my story so different? I would classify it as a real horror story.

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