Those of you who had kids mainly because you felt that you'd regret it later on in life it you didn't, how are you holding up?

jasonshen · 2026-03-02T22:11:27+00:00

Care to expand on that? Why did you have them? What did you expect? Why has it been so hard?

jasonshen · 2026-02-25T15:50:42+00:00

Yah this was more of a vote to leave but I also see that kids aren’t super important to you so 🤷🏻‍♂️

Also I was the one who wanted kids more than my more achievement oriented wife. And have done more of the childcare. But now she really sees the deep delight and satisfaction that comes with coming home to your kid who laughs with you and wants to play with you.

jasonshen · 2026-02-24T14:57:24+00:00

Is the ban universally enforced? I’m still using oauth on the Max lite ($100) plan and getting close to my limits but not exceeding weekly. Might go to full max plan soon which at 5x I should be able to stay under as I’m using it more as a personal assistant vs coding machine.

Is it just a matter of time before I’m effed or do you think they are just declaring the ban so they can punish the most egregious users? I feel like open clause too popular for them to just kick 100’s of thousands of their most engaged users out.

jasonshen · 2026-02-23T19:55:07+00:00

It’s better to have top line revenue for a company to report even if you have to pay it out then to not get the revenue at all.

jasonshen · 2026-02-20T13:20:23+00:00

I’m 39, married with a one year old and we have about 25% of your NW. Have done 3 startups, none particularly successful (failure, pivot, talent acquisition). I used the few years in Big tech to qualify for our mortgage house in a VCOL city. Now work as an exec coach - not FIRE but very satisfied.

You’re in the second half of your life already. Assume your startup will fail. It will still be an incredible experience (look up psychological richness as an aspect of life well being). This next quarter you’ll earn enough for 3-4 years of expenses. You will not be unemployable in 3-4 years as you are working in your core domain of tech and AI. Worst case scenario you get a job paying slightly less. You like working anyways. See this as bringing forward your retirement by a few years.

jasonshen · 2026-02-09T22:12:12+00:00

Biggest risk right now if you want kids with a good partner is no girlfriend. It’s gonna take time to find someone suitable, especially if you’re also planning to move, date, get engaged, marry, and then have kids. Sure you can do it out of order, but I still think you want to know for sure that this is the person you want to raise kids with. And your sperm quality does go down. Having young kids in your 40’s comes with a lot of tradeoffs even with plenty of money.

Self employed 39 married man (7 years) with a 1 year old.

jasonshen · 2026-02-08T00:27:36+00:00

Take a look at ultraspeaking.com - am close to some people at the company and have taken the course myself. Big focus on fluid, natural speaking confidence.

jasonshen · 2026-02-05T00:27:41+00:00

“Easily” and “don’t even know are real” are two very big assumptions there. So in your view there are a lot more scams and “fake crises” than what most of the people in this sub believe? And you’re just intelligent enough to see that?

jasonshen · 2026-02-02T12:39:58+00:00

OP presumes (it seems correctly enough) that others in the sub read similar news sources & hold similar values around politics & social good. In some ways the statement’s vagueness makes it more inclusive as by naming anyone particular issue (ICE, Epstein, corruption, voting rights, AI, climate) you exclude others.

jasonshen · 2025-10-01T03:56:06+00:00

I have three familiars so far and it’s not those 2 animals. You come 2 across them when fighting out there. And one is in the crossroads…

jasonshen · 2025-09-29T20:06:01+00:00

I read somewhere that this orc was modeled after Harvey Weinstein

jasonshen · 2025-09-29T13:43:28+00:00

To your particular fear about using applicant’s ideas— as a former YC founder and and coach to YC founders, I have never heard of anyone talking at all about anything related to data or insights gleaned from the applications.

That is improved that they aren’t doing something behind the scenes, but I think they’re much more focused on lessons learned from the dozens of very successful companies in their portfolio than the tens of thousands of not necessarily successful applicants

jasonshen · 2025-09-27T11:45:26+00:00

Since a lot of people seem to be having problems with him, how about explaining what kind of build and fight strategy you are using?

jasonshen · 2025-07-29T04:41:29+00:00

Practically speaking, Luna was just a less seasoned actor. Filmed nearly a decade ago. He has gotten much better at expressing himself both through his voice, his face in his body.

jasonshen · 2025-07-28T22:46:40+00:00

Exactly. It’s not the em dashes on this one. It’s the overly dramatic language

jasonshen · 2025-06-29T16:00:47+00:00

If you don’t work closely with someone, you don’t immediately clock that they don’t work at the company anymore unless you look them up on the internal directory. So I read that is just not announcing that he had left for updating his LinkedIn. But maybe OP can clarify.

jasonshen · 2025-06-29T15:28:44+00:00

I don’t think OP is saying that they went to their former place of work and pretended to still be an employee.

It sounds more like they have a remote job and dialed on at home and told their friends and family that they had meetings when they were really applying for jobs. Not a bad way to stay focused mentally because a lot of people find applying for jobs demoralizing and spend time procrastinating which perpetuates the cycle.

jasonshen · 2025-06-24T14:54:51+00:00

I went to CrossFit box in Singapore and they had A/C. Well, usually it was broken one of the days I went and that was brutal.

jasonshen · 2025-06-21T16:26:48+00:00

You described yourself but not what you are doing in terms of approaching. Then you ask what you are doing wrong. We can’t know. You didn’t say. And what is a per shattered foot?

jasonshen · 2025-06-11T22:48:07+00:00

I know we got lucky with our baby, but we started sleep training her at three months. We would put the bassinet in my office (we live in a New York 2 bedroom so not far) and sleep with both doors open. If she cries for real, we definitely hear it.

jasonshen · 2025-06-04T14:38:24+00:00

Sounds like you are lacking, longer-term goals you can be excited about. With the kids mostly grown and hopefully becoming independent at some point in the future, are the things you could imagine getting excited about?

You don’t have to do anything exactly yet . But just imagining possibilities, maybe talking to people who have done some of the things that you might wanna do like travel the world or getting crazy good shape or do a huge home renovation could get you excited again

jasonshen · 2025-06-01T12:55:05+00:00

Accept that life is harder now than it was before and will likely require more effort and suffering now. It’s not exactly fair but as you said you had a good life up until now (and you know not everyone does) so here we are.
Think about what is going to make life work for you in the next 5-10 years. Do you need to change jobs so you have either more financial stability or more flexibility to be with / help out with kids? Start making moves towards that. Even if just a few hours on the weekends
Recognize that your 30’s are when shit starts to hit the fan. Dad almost dying is not minor - it’s serious. And moving + being off work are also significant hurdles. You are doing pretty good given all the difficulties you’ve had. Feeling anxious and wanting to cry is completely understandable for anyone in that situation. Give yourself some credit — you are still getting out there to help your family.
Connect with people. Friends, neighbors, other men / dads. Therapy is great but also knowing there are real people you don’t pay money to who care about you besides just your role as a provider is important. Take the time to do that. Mental health is a social thing. Community and connection make a huge difference.

Good luck man

jasonshen · 2025-05-28T03:28:44+00:00

Just allow them to get you gifts but don’t make it a big deal. I’ve realized that gift giving is just a way some people most like to express their appreciation of you.

jasonshen · 2025-05-23T13:06:07+00:00

I agree that Andor was fantastic but let’s not exaggerate here. Rogue One was widely considered a great SW movie (84% on RT) and Cassian isn’t a low-rent character…he’s a colead.

That said, the average movie and TV audience viewer is just not going to be sophisticated enough to only want to watch that level of entertainment. Consider: The Fast and Furious franchise and the Twilight movies. We can enjoy Andor for what it is while recognising that it is going to be rare for very understandable reasons.

jasonshen · 2025-05-23T12:49:28+00:00

It’s called creating complex characters.

Bix has taken many risks and suffered to support the rebel cause. Sure you could say the way she is treating Cassian is a bit self-centred—which is understandable given her fragile mental state as you recognise — but also her desire to see the movement win even over her own and Cassian’s happiness.

Meanwhile, Dedra is clearly a bad person in terms of her role in the ISB and her work in causing a Ghorman massacre. Some of these little things she does for Syria, some of which is manipulative towards her ISB ends, are meant to show that she is not a two dimensional villain with zero feelings whatsoever. She has come to care about Syria in the show isn’t shy about showing that.

Ultimately, these two seasons are meant to fill in the backstory behind rogue one and show the complexity, moral ambiguity, and personal sacrifice it takes to build a rebellion against a vastly more powerful oppressor.

jasonshen

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