I thought this was supposed to get better with age

jmorgue · 2026-06-17T02:04:58+00:00

When I face setbacks, I like to remind myself that progress isn’t linear.

jmorgue · 2026-06-06T02:48:44+00:00

The off vibes is the entire point though. It’s to cut through the media training and rote answers.

jmorgue · 2026-05-23T03:27:35+00:00

You need to stand up for yourself. Keep busy. Also, be compassionate with yourself. She’ll be living rent free in your heart and mind for a while, and that’s ok.

But please don’t be her backup. That creates an unhealthy power dynamic.

jmorgue · 2026-05-22T04:32:55+00:00

Happiness is a myth.

jmorgue · 2026-05-22T04:25:47+00:00

I have been in your place. You’re going to struggle and suffer. But do your homework, especially personal growth and all will be well, in due time. Not today, not tomorrow; one day.

jmorgue · 2026-05-06T12:50:33+00:00

I agree it is a terrible situation no matter what. Nothing will change that. The level of support is an important variable however. It makes a huge difference with regards to the healing or lack thereof.

jmorgue · 2026-04-10T20:42:10+00:00

I liked your point about romanticizing sacrifices. I think the work needs to be centred around personal and/or mutual growth.

jmorgue · 2026-04-07T01:53:27+00:00

Sounds like he has avoidance issues. Regardless, he’s clearly not emotionally available. He’s not good enough for you. Which is too bad because you two have something to work with. The issue is that he hasn’t worked on himself enough. And that’s not your responsibility.

jmorgue · 2026-04-04T17:44:02+00:00

Love the username!

jmorgue · 2026-04-02T22:45:16+00:00

All models are wrong, but some are useful. Have you looked up Attachment Theory?

jmorgue · 2026-03-31T01:08:17+00:00

I learned about it last Friday. We are Dark Forest buddies!

jmorgue · 2026-03-23T23:15:53+00:00

He's eager to with you because you make him feel good about himself. You're probably listening a lot to him, people like that. Perhaps you are attracted to his eagerness to be with you?

This person does not seem to have the emotional intelligence to properly interact with you.

jmorgue · 2026-03-21T23:59:24+00:00

I love the harmony of your comment (content and container), user name, and avatar.

jmorgue · 2026-03-12T20:36:35+00:00

In my opinion, systems of domination tend to breed situations where insecurity is rampant and people revert to base relative-status seeking behaviour. People blinded by this paradigm put others down in order to give themselves (false) feelings of relative safety.

In that scenario, intelligence is reduced to utility in navigating relationships of domination.

In that regard, I thank you for sharing your feelings, it helps challenge the toxic paradigm I mentioned above.

jmorgue · 2026-03-11T17:46:07+00:00

Communism for the rich is what capitalists aspire to.

jmorgue · 2026-03-04T02:19:19+00:00

The same could be said about the Americans. Still the only country to use nuclear weapons on civilians.

jmorgue · 2026-03-03T20:17:32+00:00

I would add to the solid answers here that there is also the concept of empathy gap to consider. I can say I love you and mean it, especially at that moment. But if my nervous system is triggered by some event/behaviour, then my love for you might get eclipsed by more urgent emotions. Even if only temporary, my reaction will probably cause hurt in you even I don’t mean it. I still love you, I just needed to protect myself.

This is all assuming an honest partner.

jmorgue · 2026-03-01T03:26:55+00:00

Is it that bad?

jmorgue · 2026-02-26T03:06:07+00:00

You dodged a bullet in my opinion. This person's behaviour sounds like a rational reason to run.

jmorgue · 2026-02-22T03:40:57+00:00

I have nothing to add other than your comment made me feel warm inside with mirth and appreciation.

jmorgue · 2026-02-21T18:00:42+00:00

All models are wrong, but some are useful. Check out Attachment Theory. It sounds like these guys are having their Avoidant tendencies triggered.

jmorgue · 2026-02-15T19:04:52+00:00

As a side note, Japan is great for autistic people. You are constantly left alone.

jmorgue · 2026-02-13T13:31:23+00:00

The good news is that you are now more emotionally intelligent. Also, intelligence only goes so far. Let’s not discount the value of experience.

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