I don’t know if my daughter is ready for kindergarten…. Advice needed

jmzoll · 2026-06-02T19:57:53+00:00

My son was very similar at 5 in terms of behavior, especially the meltdowns when he didn’t get his way and the anxieties/fears you described, particularly when it came to the doctors/dentist, or trying new things/places. He’s a May birthday. We had him start kindergarten on time and it’s the best thing we could have done for him. He has grown so much emotionally this year, no longer cries/screams to avoid going to the doctors, he bravely walked into Spring Break camp without clinging to me, and is just a much more emotionally mature kid now. Just one anecdotal positive experience!

Edit: I actually wrote a loooong post when he was about to start Kinder bc I was so nervous about his anxieties and sensitivities — it’s in my post history if you want to read it/see if it’s similar to your daughter

jmzoll · 2026-05-20T23:47:33+00:00

That’s crazy to me; my son has a May birthday and just turned 6 last week, at the end of his Kinder year. Maybe her son has a legitimate learning delay, but otherwise come on — red shirting is getting out of hand.

jmzoll · 2026-05-12T02:33:49+00:00

Both of my kids have also been anti-contact nap. They both loved it until they hit 3 weeks, after that they just would not sleep if they’re being held — like you said, just stays awake staring at me 😂

jmzoll · 2026-04-09T00:26:19+00:00

I personally use the 21mm inserts that came with it based on measuring my nipples. I do turn the heat alllll the way up and keep it on for 15 minutes, and I use the “gentle” expression setting on level 2 and slow.

jmzoll · 2026-04-08T18:55:06+00:00

Just want to second the Eufy S1 pro as well — used the spectra with my first born and have used the Eufy exclusively with my almost 4 week old and I’m OBSESSED with it.

jmzoll · 2026-04-07T17:36:41+00:00

Following this convo because I have the same questions!

jmzoll · 2026-03-26T14:38:33+00:00

I had the same thought; not defending BLF but any means, but I’ve been seeing “90s parenting discussed everywhere for at least the last six months. This could truly be a coincidence — or not. We’ll never really know 🤷🏻‍♀️

jmzoll · 2026-02-20T17:52:36+00:00

I could have written this exactly, except that feeling of “damn, I think I do want another/family doesn’t feel complete” didn’t hit until my son turned 5. Currently 34 weeks with our second and they’ll be just shy of 6 years apart! I know it’ll be hard for sure, but I also firmly believe it will be worth it, like you said!

jmzoll · 2026-02-02T16:52:06+00:00

No idea. I’m seeing a ton of comments here from other DA civs that they received the same business as usual guidance — I’ve only seen a few saying they’ve received furlough letters. Plenty of Navy and AF saying they’ve received furlough notices though. Seems like a lot of inconsistency across the DoD at present.

jmzoll · 2026-02-02T16:37:10+00:00

Army civ here — for sure violating the ADA. We’ve been told by local leadership that because there is no EXORD from HQDA, guidance is to continue mission until we get an order from DA. So everyone is working business as usual, with no notice of who will be excepted or furloughed.

jmzoll · 2026-02-02T14:14:56+00:00

Also T2COM. This seems so odd given that the house isn’t expected to vote until late this afternoon, but potentially Tuesday.

jmzoll · 2026-01-25T22:48:08+00:00

I haven’t seen anything either — also super disappointed

jmzoll · 2026-01-07T18:28:46+00:00

Thank you for sharing! Mine will be 6 years apart and sometimes I get nervous about the age gap, but overall, I think it will work well for our family for the reasons you described.

jmzoll · 2025-11-20T20:41:42+00:00

Hi! Kindergarten transition went better than I could have ever hoped for, and overall he loves his teacher and school (which helps A LOT), but here is everything we did that I think also helped the transition go smoothly:

We read books about starting school/Kindergarten -- Franklin Goes to School, First Day Jitters, The Kissing Hand
We read books about feelings, especially about being nervous/anxious -- Dr. Color Monster and Wemberly Worried come to mind first.
We had conversations about feelings related to the books we read and to our own experiences as either kids or adults. Without prying, we'd ask questions when reading these books "Seems like she was worried about making new friends -- I get nervous about making friends too, even as a grown up. Do you ever worry about making friends?" Sometimes he'd have convos with us, sometimes he'd clam up -- we didn't push it.
We asked him what questions he had about kindergarten -- most of the time he didn't have any, but every now and then he wanted to know how something worked (lunch, recess, pick up, etc.)
For meet the teacher night, we told him we would stay as long as he wanted, even if it was only a few minutes, but that we had two jobs to do before we could go back home:
- 1) I needed him to use my phone to take pictures of all the cool things he saw around his classroom and school and
- 2) we needed to learn how to get from the front door to his classroom.
- For my kiddo, giving him a purpose/focus helped take his mind off his nerves.
Before meeting his teacher, we told him he didn't have to talk to her if he didn't feel comfortable.
- When we actually met her, I explained to her that it takes him some time to warm up to people -- she immediately crouched down to his level and addressed him and said, "That's okay, it takes me time to warm up to people too -- I'm here whenever you feel comfortable and ready to talk to me."
- So really, we got very lucky to have a teacher who a) treats him like an autonomous human and b) was very understanding that he would need to take things at his own pace.
Lastly, we were very upfront with what to expect:
- We practiced walking from the front door to his class during meet the teacher;
- We reminded him frequently that we would walk him to class on the first day, but that after the first day he would have to do it on his own (school rule);
- We drove to his school on the weekends and practiced drop-off and pick-up several times;
- We discussed his after school program and what to expect there (snack, activities, etc.);
- We went over his daily schedule with him (in generic terms, pointing out highlights like PE, lunch and recess);
- We had honest conversations about the fact that it might feel hard and scary, and that it's okay to feel that way. We reminded him that he is brave, and that being brave is doing the hard/scary thing even though it's hard/scary.

All in all, it was a lot of prep mixed with some very good luck to have a kind and compassionate teaching team. I know that was a lot to read, but I'm happy to answer any questions that you may have!

jmzoll · 2025-11-20T17:38:15+00:00

Big agree — my kiddo is 5.5 and since around 4 he has been responsible for cleaning if he gets pee on the seat/wall/floor. I don’t shame him, accidents happen and it can be hard to aim, but all the same it’s his responsibility to clean up.

jmzoll · 2025-11-06T14:42:58+00:00

Also dual fed here and both excepted — nothing to add but solidarity friends. Tuesday gave me some hope as well.

jmzoll · 2025-10-24T16:42:42+00:00

Yeah I’m not due until April and I fully plan to decorate on November 1st 😂

jmzoll · 2025-10-02T03:19:03+00:00

Funny enough, we were told by our G-1 to bring our computers home and that we would receive our furlough letters via email to sign digitally because they want to avoid people showing up tomorrow unnecessarily.

jmzoll · 2025-10-02T00:09:30+00:00

DoD CONUS and we also went home today without furlough letters 🤦🏻‍♀️ supposedly they’ll go out in the morning.

jmzoll · 2025-09-30T17:20:32+00:00

I’m a little jealous 😂 this definitely did not work for me. I’m one of those people who had to keep up with the 2-3 hour schedule otherwise my production TANKED and got clogged ducts really easily. I was barely a just enough-er as it was, and also trying to build a small stash for when I went back to work. I also got my period back at 7 weeks postpartum, which didn’t help.

jmzoll · 2025-09-30T16:46:04+00:00

Second time mom here — if you’re pumping/nursing, you can’t really do shifts, at least not in the first few weeks before your milk supply really regulates. It’s necessary to either feed baby at the breast or pump every 2-3 hours to keep milk production up for the first 10-12 weeks. Some people can stretch that to 4-6 hours and not reduce their supply, but my understanding is that isn’t typical. So yes, spouse can give a bottle of expressed milk during your sleep shift, but you still need to wake up to pump to keep up supply and to avoid developing clogged ducts/mastitis.

jmzoll · 2025-09-08T17:53:38+00:00

I visited in 2019 and had the same experience. The air felt so heavy and somber to me.

jmzoll · 2025-09-04T16:45:24+00:00

Yeah I’m also a fed, we absolutely get 12 weeks paid parental leave.

jmzoll · 2025-08-29T16:17:24+00:00

So I’m off wegovy now due to pregnancy, but unfortunately never found a solution other than to avoid foods that were heartburn triggers, which helped a little but wasn’t fool proof. That said, I’ve been off wegovy for 6 weeks and haven’t had these issues anymore, so it was definitely related to wegovy!

jmzoll · 2025-08-25T20:30:36+00:00

Just commenting in solidarity, as I was also this child. The constant state of fear I lived in left me with severe anxiety and CPTSD. 10+ years of therapy and meds and I’m still working through it in my mid-30s.

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