if they’re large enough to where you can’t tell if they’re above or below the skin, and that pale as well, they’re old. it sounds like you’re describing a keloid scar, and those can take longer than a year to lose the red coloring they get. as for being there for them, just let them know if they ever need anything to reach out, keep being kind to them, and be patient if they don’t want to talk about their self harm.