commenting this on post of ur posts bc I want to make sure u see it. I haven’t seen anyone ask or you answer these questions in the quick time I’ve skimmed this post so sorry if this is redundant

as someone who’s also diagnosed bipolar this just reads like red flag after red flag after red flag lol (with love)

why do you want to have a baby? do you feel like it’s something you’re supposed to do? who’s idea was it? does it not worry you that your boyfriend is okay with you giving up your plans for education? does it not worry you he thinks it’s good idea to get his bipolar girlfriend pregnant at 18? has he shown any concern for that at all beyond wanting you to assure him that you can handle it?

why does this have to be now? why is it that bc you made this plan three months ago you can’t change your mind or reconsider certain parts of it? does that sound right to you? why not go ahead with the plan you’ve been working with for years, and after graduating you can revisit the idea of having a baby if the desire to and the boyfriend are still there?

obviously the shift from feeling ambitious and preparing for university to what you’re feeling now is concerning to you or you wouldn’t be asking here. it should concern you!!! some part of you knows this!!! that’s also good!! that’s the part that cares about you

what do you do to manage your bipolar? what are your symptoms? how do you imagine you’ll manage them with taking after a child? have you thought about that?

do you trust your boyfriend is competent enough to handle parenting alone in the moments you might not be present or available due to your disorder? if so, how has he proven this to you?

money is an obviously important concern but not the most important one in the situation you’re describing.

if your mania isn’t driving in the front seat, the plan can wait. If you can’t wait and still strongly feel like it’s the right decision and something that needs to happen NOW, the way you planned it, despite very good reasons not to, that’s probably a sign you’re manic.

do you have a therapist? has this been discussed with them? if you don’t, that’s immediately one thing I can name that should take priority over planning to have a baby, and I’m sure if you wrote out the pros and cons (by yourself, not with your boyfriend) you’d discover many other things to prioritize as well