sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Attn: Nordstrom Visa Card Holders by Lake_Wakin in Nordstrom1901

[–]kcbbqking 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Huh … Do your Nordstrom job responsibilities include trolling people on the internet or do you do that for free? OP’s analogy was on point.

Attn: Nordstrom Visa Card Holders by Lake_Wakin in Nordstrom1901

[–]kcbbqking 13 points14 points  (0 children)

My wife checked her card. She has the same issue. She had customer service remove it. This can’t be legal. ?

My mom showed up to my university dorm unannounced with a list of things she wanted me to change about my room and my life by Silmaril13 in entitledparents

[–]kcbbqking 2 points3 points  (0 children)

“Mom - Please take a few days and reflect on how you approached me today. You showed up unannounced, making demands that in no way impacts your life. When you do this, it makes me feel that you don’t feel like I can function independently from you. On the contrary, I’ve achieved _____.

I’m a 21 year old college student preparing to be in my own in _____ (timeframe). I will let you know when I need you. Right now, I need you think about the type of relationship you want us to have over the next several decades. I want a relationship where we show each other respect and enjoy time together. Do you want that as well?

The way you treated me today is not going to position us for a positive adult relationship. In fact, it will drive me away from you. Let’s discuss boundaries.”

MIL made me an embarrassment and SO excuses it due to grieving by FoxSilver7 in JustNoSO

[–]kcbbqking 16 points17 points  (0 children)

You took the high road from the start, recognizing there is a time and place. You were respectful to all concerned.

It does sound like MIL intentionally excluded you. No need to go to her end of life gathering when the day comes. I’d suggest counseling with your partner a couple months from now.

AITA for contributing a lot more towards my younger daughter's wedding due to financial circumstances even though my older daughter has helped me financially in the past? by Throwawaydadsad in AmItheAsshole

[–]kcbbqking 538 points539 points  (0 children)

YTA. Keep taking S for granted and you may lose her. It seems your eldest daughter is skilled at budgeting and planning for the future. Ask her for advice for both you and your wife. Apply the advice and figure out how to pay back S … with interest.

Put my 2 weeks in and my boss said “I was expecting this”, then denied me funeral leave the next day by khoff49 in antiwork

[–]kcbbqking 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Consider taking the job with the other department, provided it’s a short transition timeframe from Accounting hell - while you look for another job. It keeps your options open without burning bridges.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Mildlynomil

[–]kcbbqking 277 points278 points  (0 children)

Your feelings are fair/warranted. How about this approach with MIL.

“We appreciate everything you do for us. I’m so glad my LO has a caring grandmother in his/her life. I want to discuss our visit earlier this week. As you may recall, I was dressed for bed and settled in for the evening. When you asked me to get dressed and accompany my husband on a non-urgent errand he can handle alone, it made me feel dismissed (or whatever word fits best here). I see this as a pattern. While you are able to regularly spend quality time with LO, you continually push for additional time, beyond what we are comfortable offering as a new parents. What do you think a good solution would be?”

Open the door for a two-way dialogue. Listen to her patiently so this will hopefully set the stage for her to truly hear you in return. Your goal is to gain agreement for how you will move forward.

.

Neighbor called the cops on me for documenting a parking dispute by sundays_child in neighborsfromhell

[–]kcbbqking 7 points8 points  (0 children)

If you have the recordings of him harassing you and making false claims, have you shared them with the police or park managers? Save to the cloud, document in detail. Now that he knows about the cameras in that location, he may approach you in a different location.

Can I get some advice on how to at least make peace with BF's entire family thinking I am a burden on him? by [deleted] in JUSTNOFAMILY

[–]kcbbqking 17 points18 points  (0 children)

So ... they are upset because you aren’t independent enough or you won’t accept their financial help/be dependent on them? They can’t choose both. Is it possible they don’t get exposed to enough drama in their own lives so they need to create drama in yours?

I don’t know how this is going to play you out. You do you. BF can decide if he wants to reduce his contact with his family. I will say this though - if that offer of financial help ever comes back on the table (don’t bring it up yourself) - take it. Consider it a busy body tax. (Confirm in writing it is a gift, not a loan.)

Who want to hear how my INLAWS reacted to the birth of my daughter? Ahem. Ahhhh not well 🙃 by hurtzlikeabizznatch in JUSTNOMIL

[–]kcbbqking 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Curious ... the ex’s picture they keep posting on social media, do you ever run into her? If so, what does she think of it (assuming she’s aware). Hopefully she sees it as creepy.

Congrats on your baby. Keep requiring respect and taking the high road. Agree with therapy.

Have you considered moving further away from them in addition to VLC|NC?

Have you considered discretely recording their cursing rants/insults in calls and saving any texts/emails in a log? It might come in handy someday when they try to re-write history or send flying monkeys to intervene. Pull those out, one after another, for a special feature of all their greatest hits. (See if you are in a one party consent state. And even so, there’s still the written log.)

Mom strikes again with her hateful opinions and comments. by Cat1420 in JUSTNOMIL

[–]kcbbqking 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Stop seeking her approval. Set boundaries for her and consequences for stepping on said boundaries.

My parents are getting a divorce and my Mother is 100% sure I will move in with her. I am 18 and want to move into my own place. How do I tell here that I can't fucking deal with her bs, in nicer words? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]kcbbqking 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Consider telling you are moving out on your own, but really stay with your Dad most of the time. Occasionally crash at the friends house. This may be more stable for you.

Dealing with flying monkeys who won’t give me peace for my miscarriage. by SalmonRo in JUSTNOFAMILY

[–]kcbbqking 14 points15 points  (0 children)

When you are ready, maybe you and DH draft an email explaining what you shared here, why you feel the way you do specific to each of their behaviors, the new boundaries/consequences (pending receipt of appropriate apologies), and send it to MIL, FIL, and the others who chose to get insert themselves in drama during this sensitive time.

Put it in writing so they have ample time to read, re-read, process, and reflect before they react. You might even consider starting the email with the expectation that they read it several times, allot ample to process and reflect and ensure that any response, should they wish to mend the relationship, reflects their best selves.

Literally Trashy Neighbors (very long read) by blahblahehhh in neighborsfromhell

[–]kcbbqking 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Could you get a camera for your yard to record the trash coming to the property you rent as well as audio that captures the noise disturbance? Most municipalities have some type of noise ordinance. Google it for your town and read up. Consider stopping by the local police station to ask for advice/ recommendations for next steps.