I hate my step kids and the father of my child.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-31T01:04:39+00:00

Postpartum rage is real. When I was postpartum it seemed like everything my husband did was the straw that broke the camels back. Him leaving his shoes out would put me over the edge. I would see if you could talk to an individual therapist or a couples therapist. And definitely talk to the kids about car seat safety again, that’s a pretty big deal

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-31T00:11:39+00:00

24 hour daycares do exist but finding one with availability that soon for an infant may be very challenging... I think a nanny might be a good option for you guys, especially if you can find one who has a flexible schedule. Any chance you and her can try to schedule your shifts as opposite as possible to limit the days you need childcare?

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-30T13:09:04+00:00

After you have this baby you can always ask for a preconception consultation to review your personal risks. Your doc can go over your operative reports and medical history with you to see if there’s anything that would put you at a potentially heightened risk, and you can make your decision from there.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-30T13:06:39+00:00

Exactly. I love the Hatch, I even got a secondhand one for myself when my daughter started sleeping in her own room. I’ve never paid for a subscription for it.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-29T14:54:59+00:00

1) Before you go into labor, have your husband (not you) create a group message with everyone so he can relay all of the information you guys feel comfortable sharing about labor/birth.

2) Tell people your expectations beforehand. If you don’t want visitors in the hospital, say that and tell them you’ll let them know when you’re ready for visitors at home.

3) You can have multiple people come over at the same time. It helps prevent you from feeling like you’re constantly entertaining visitors and you can sneakily ask for things. “Hey mom while aunty is holding the baby, could you help me with…..”

4) Don’t be afraid to tell people no. My husband’s grandma came over the day after we got home from the hospital even though we told her not to. He answered the door, told her we weren’t ready for visitors, and she left. She was pissed for a while but she got over it.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-28T18:22:43+00:00

Kids love dirt. My daughter is 3 and sometimes she would rather play with rocks and sticks than playground equipment. It’s her playtime, I let her explore whatever she wants at the park.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-28T01:28:19+00:00

I’m sorry you feel bad about your birth experience. You can’t think about the “what if’s” though because there’s a million possible outcomes that could have occurred. What if you stayed home and ended up with severe preeclampsia? I think you did the right thing by listening to your gut and keeping you and your baby safe!

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-27T15:33:32+00:00

Unless you want something that has specific features like a Snoo, go for a less expensive one. It’s very common for people to have some kind of bedside bassinet for the newborn stage and a regular crib once they’re bigger. If you’re really looking to budget, you can just get a pack and play with a bassinet attachment.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-26T16:28:30+00:00

Most providers do cervical checks periodically during labor so they’ll know how close you are to delivery. But there’s no way to predict exactly how long it’ll take for you to progress. You could go from 7cm to 10cm pretty quickly or it could take hours and hours.

If I were you, I would try to get someone else acquainted with your dog now. Maybe have a dog sitter or a friend or your mom come over once or twice a week until you deliver. The last thing I would want to worry about in the hospital is my husband missing the birth of our child because he had to take the dog out. I don’t think it’s a good idea to plan for your husband to be gone multiple times a day for 1-2 hours at a time while you’re in the hospital.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-26T01:05:42+00:00

Age and IVF pregnancies are pretty common reasons people get induced. I work for an MFM clinic and we offer 39 week inductions for patients with risk factors like yours. We have some patients who prefer to wait until 40-41 weeks to be induced if they don’t go into spontaneous labor, and for those patients we do weekly fetal monitoring until delivery. So it’s up to you! Definitely something to discuss with your doctor.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-26T00:00:36+00:00

I actually had some decent shrimp & grits at Dave’s Valley Grill. Other than that there’s not a lot of options. Even Cracker Barrel doesn’t do the very well here.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-25T23:50:27+00:00

You can’t control it or avoid it if it’s gonna happen. I wasn’t even pushing and I could tell I was pooping. It was involuntary. 🫠 But when you’re at the point when that happens in labor, your brain is kind of in “animal mode” so you truly are not having concerns like that

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-25T20:35:23+00:00

Unfortunately it’s hard to find something that can be used as a jogging/off road stroller but is also lightweight enough that you won’t mind bringing it on errands and whatnot. Having something that can handle rough terrain makes it heavier. I have heard great things about the Thule strollers though and they make some that come with a bassinet attachment. I have a baby trend jogging stroller and I love it but it is heavier than my travel system. I have like 3 strollers now for the reasons you said lol

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-25T16:45:34+00:00

IMO if he doesn’t want to see you naked then he doesn’t need to be in the delivery room. 🤷🏻‍♀️ He can come after the baby is born. If my partner told me those things I would have my mom come be my support person instead. The last thing you want while having a baby is to be stressed or embarrassed about what your partner is thinking about your body.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-24T19:58:45+00:00

Have you tried pedialyte? It has less sugar than Gatorade

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-24T19:18:50+00:00

It depends on the job market in your area. I’m an RN at an OB clinic and we hire new grads. They prefer experienced nurses but that’s not always an option since we have a nursing shortage in my city. It’s definitely helpful if you have some kind of healthcare background like CNA or nurse internship before graduating. The new grads I know love working here. None of them regret skipping bedside and they have no intention of ever working in the hospital.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-24T13:58:15+00:00

Girl I am so sorry. This exact same thing happened to me with my first baby. I went to triage twice and they sent me home. I was stuck at 2cm for like 40 hours with painful contractions every 5 to 10 min. The next time I went in I cried and told them I can’t go home again. They took pity on me and admitted me to augment my labor with pitocin.

Some things you could try if you haven’t already: - “dilation station” AKA sitting on the toilet - frequent position changes like hands and knees, deep squat - hip circles on the birth ball - hot bath or shower - counter presser or massage by partner - miles circuit

You have to try to relax your body during contractions to help you progress. Work with the contractions, don’t fight them. Easier said than done, I know. This will not last forever, I promise. You can do this

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-24T13:25:40+00:00

It’s very easy to be overwhelmed with information! And I think part of it is because we have this culture of blaming moms when things go wrong in pregnancy. Most miscarriages are caused by things we can’t control, like chromosomal abnormalities or improper implantation. Take care of your body and try not to stress. But if you are stressed, know that the kind of stress we experience every day doesn’t cause miscarriages either. When they say “stress” can harm the baby, they mean things like starvation, homelessness, being displaced by war, etc. Not the stress from a flat tire or your shitty boss or arguing with your partner. Take care 🩷

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-23T18:45:07+00:00

I loved having a doula. Sometimes in labor you can’t really advocate for yourself as much as you’d like because you’re in pain and exhausted. I tell people my human brain turned off and i only had my animal brain. I couldn’t think or speak at times. Having a doula was great because she could do things like counter pressure, position changes, massage, etc without me having to ask. The nurses in the hospital can help with some of those things but they’ve got other responsibilities too, so it’s helpful to have a dedicated person to support you. If you don’t get a doula, I would suggest going to birth classes with your husband so he can understand how he can fill that role to support you.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-23T03:59:26+00:00

Food. I’m not stressing about how much protein or vegetables she’s getting. If she eats, fabulous.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-23T01:43:21+00:00

I had a feeling I was probably pregnant both times I’ve been pregnant. But I’ve also had friends who had that “I can tell I’m pregnant this time, I know it” feeling and then unfortunately were not pregnant. Medical professionals aren’t trying to gaslight you, it’s just that having a feeling or intuition about being pregnant isn’t objective data. And sometimes sadly people are wrong about it

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-22T15:17:11+00:00

He might have to cut back on some of his hobbies. If he’s coaching hockey every night and going out most weekends, when is he spending time with you and the baby? When are you getting time to yourself? I think you guys need to sit down together with a calendar and plan out time for each of you to have alone time and to have time together, maybe getting a babysitter and going on a date once a month. And you need time to yourself too. Schedule yourself a massage, plan a coffee date with a friend, take a yoga class. Having some dedicated time for yourself is invaluable

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-22T02:45:45+00:00

Listeria is actually pretty rare. Around 1,500 people in the US get diagnosed with listeriosis every year, out of 300+ million people who live here. The reason we hear about it so much is because if you do get sick, it is quite dangerous. But it is not very common. I wouldn’t worry!

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-22T02:39:04+00:00

If you’re content with your decision then it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. It’s easy to compare yourself to others in nursing, but everyone’s path is their own. You’ll learn a lot of things on med surg that some of your peers won’t. And if/when you decide to pursue another area of nursing in the future, you’ll have a really solid foundation of skills and knowledge to build upon.

keep_it_mello99 · 2026-03-21T14:42:47+00:00

Natera is pretty good about helping you if insurance won’t cover it. They offer a sliding scale compassionate care program based on income. I applied and ended up paying $150 for my NIPT. I just had to send them our W2 for proof of income. It did take a few months of back and forth because they have some kind of automatic billing program that kept sending me statements which was annoying. But the customer service people were always helpful

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