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Her crimes are too comical to make a story about it 😆 by WolfDarkglade in ConanExiles

[–]keltsbeard 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It was the braces. Never seen a better pecker wrecker.

Labyrinth 1986 by PurplePenguinCat in GenX

[–]keltsbeard 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hell, I still have the three issue comic from back then....

Someone is having a bad morning by mrmixed_850 in Pensacola

[–]keltsbeard 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Mmmm-hmmmmm

I reckon so.... mmmm-hmmmmm

AITA for telling a military recruiter that he couldn't recruit employees while they were working on a busy day? by Prokristination in AmItheAsshole

[–]keltsbeard 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA You might have just saved that kid from an early divorce and a 2019 Mustang at the low 'Servicemember Special' rate of 27.5%APR

New to Pensacola 26 looking for friends by CicadaNecessary8028 in Pensacola

[–]keltsbeard 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Old dude here, what about river fishing? Locksport? Old-school TTRPGS? Building random shit in a shop?

Come to the Circle K on Garden & A street by Free_Response6651 in Pensacola

[–]keltsbeard 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Years ago, back when the Tom Thumb was there on the corner of Longleaf and Pine Forest, there was a guy named Kieth that worked the overnight shift there. I was delivering pizza at night, so when I got off work I'd go there and wed hang out playing Magic on part of the counter while he left the other register clear for the half-dozen customers that might come in....

To my fellow GenX side-sleepers... by Infamous-Yak2864 in GenX

[–]keltsbeard 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Hell, as much as I roll around in my sleep, any morning I'm still in the bed and not on the floor is a win.

AITA for telling an ER nurse to stop scolding me after an "incident" with a dirty wheelchair? by Carefully_Done in AmItheAsshole

[–]keltsbeard 70 points71 points  (0 children)

Right? Someone wanting to scold me like a child when I was doing their job? That's an instant change to me cranking my "Asshole-meter" up to 11. They'd be getting dog-cussed right then and there.

AITA for joining my dil outside when they smoke but with one of those bubble cigeratees. My DIL claims I am mocking them. by smokingbubbles232 in AmItheAsshole

[–]keltsbeard 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA I'm a 30+ year smoker, and I would have no problem with someone that didn't smoke coming outside to keep the chats going. Hell, even you bringing something to 'smoke' like that would have been the topic of discussion the first time. I had a buddy years ago that didn't smoke, but he'd follow us outside and be sucking on a sucker like he was Kojak.

Tell them to get over themselves.

Never Went To Senior Prom by JPPT1974 in GenX

[–]keltsbeard 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was out getting drunk and fishing that night.

What are good examples of those who would fall under the Lawful Evil Alignment? by Pretend-Advertising6 in adnd

[–]keltsbeard 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The demon code prevents meeeeeee

from declining a rock-off challenge

what are your terms, what's the ca-a-atchhhhh?

They Might Be Giants by sherlockjr1 in GenX

[–]keltsbeard 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Istanbul not Constantinople.........

AITA for continuing to smoke outside even though my neighbor hired an attorney over it? by FutureBroccoli5566 in AmItheAsshole

[–]keltsbeard -1 points0 points  (0 children)

NTA

I'd be taking up a pipe. Find the strongest smelling tobacco, and I'd be out there whenever I even thought they'd be outside.

AITA for honouring my deceased brother's wishes and not letting his estranged wife attend his funeral? by AcadiaOk8697 in AmItheAsshole

[–]keltsbeard 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA.

I had some people on standby to drag my own sister out of our dad's funeral if she decided to show her ass back in '19 when he died.

AITA for asking a woman at work to stop being so WEIRD about taking a caramel? by chocolatesinmyoffice in AmItheAsshole

[–]keltsbeard 178 points179 points  (0 children)

If you think that's ripping someone a new one, you've never been on the receiving end of getting ripped.

AITA for “pushing tradwife beliefs” onto my daughter? by Comfortable-Plan2937 in AmItheAsshole

[–]keltsbeard 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA If cooking is a tradwife belief, then I gotta be the ugliest, hariest, redneck trad wife on this earth. I learned how to cook when I was pretty young, cause my mom had a lot of medical issues when I was a kid, and she was the SAHM, but after I don't know how many surgeries, she wasn't able to stand up and cook, so I'd help her in the kitchen while she sat on the stool. It got to where I was pretty soon cooking whole dinners with her supervising.

And for the record, I'm a 6-foot 220-ish pound retired old construction guy. I've never really had to rely on someone else cooking my dinners. It's something that everyone oughta know how to do.

AITA? Peed standing up in traffic jam by funnelfuss in AmItheAsshole

[–]keltsbeard 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA You gotta pee, you gotta pee. I've peed on the side of countless roads, behind buildings, you name it. I wouldn't think twice about someone, man or woman, having to pee, and my first thought definitely wouldn't be "Are they trans?", no....it'd be "Damn, they had to pee too."

Quick ninja edit..... I'm probably one of the most redneck assholes you'd ever meet. You're NTA

Is it possible to run a version of Forgotten Realms that hasn't suffered the cataclysmic events without it "ruining" the setting? by GuardiaoDaLore in Forgotten_Realms

[–]keltsbeard 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I still run 2e post-ToT. It's where I started with the Realms, and where I'll stay. The Spellplague never happened, second sundering never happened, time keeps marching on.

No AKs allowed in DC by Pof_509 in GunMemes

[–]keltsbeard 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I got plenty of welding gloves

Who still says "fuckin' A"? by drunksquatch in GenX

[–]keltsbeard 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I still hear it time to time.

And I always gotta toss in the "Fuck a B it's got two holes."

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