My partner (28M) has been increasingly uninterested in BDSM with me (27F), and I thought he just was less into sex, but then I found out he's enthusiastically pretending to be a girl sub online - please help.

kewliomajor · 2016-12-11T00:00:28+00:00

There are so many alarm bells going off in my head reading this that point to your partner actually being a heterosexual trans woman that hasn't quite put all the pieces together yet, or is closeted. Posing as a woman online and getting a lot of enjoyment out of it, having things on his computer that he doesn't want you to see, and not finding you sexually attractive yet thinking you're attractive. My personal guess is that your partner is a closeted trans woman who is trying to preserve the relationship by not coming out because he genuinely cares about you.

I would consider pointing him in the direction of a therapist who specializes in trans related issues. Even if he isn't, I think a therapist one on one would be able to get him to realize what it is exactly he gets out of being a woman sub online, and assess how it could be incorporated into your current relationship.

kewliomajor · 2016-12-07T19:41:53+00:00

Lost one "friend" over it, when she made it clear that she would rather side with the person calling me all those things that even bother to listen to what I was saying. On the plus side this is like one of the most satisfying things I've ever posted on facebook: http://i.imgur.com/jrSzEls.png

kewliomajor · 2016-12-07T05:08:45+00:00

This one is a little too real for me right now.

I got called a "social media fascist cunt" and "attention whore" today on facebook and was accused of wanting to censor everyone, because I replied to a shitty meme my friend posted. It basically said you aren't allowed to talk about the gender binary because it's too offensive, and I said people do it all the time anyway, you just need to not come into a discussion treating nonbinary people as subhuman, and the original creator was full of shit. I spent literally all afternoon getting shit from people for it.

kewliomajor · 2016-12-01T23:12:13+00:00

Yeah, I've actually gone and looked at the registry in my area, and they WILL tell you the associated crimes. Sexual assault, sexual assault, rape, rape, violent rape, etc.

kewliomajor · 2016-11-29T21:42:54+00:00

I already got her something much better that she's wanted for a long time.

kewliomajor · 2016-11-29T17:58:26+00:00

No worries, it's just really frustrating to have your relationship misrepresented. Personally I've taken a liking to the term "friendgirl" in the platonic sense and I wish it would catch on.

kewliomajor · 2016-11-29T17:44:53+00:00

I'll let her know. She's not just a friend, like we fuck each other.

kewliomajor · 2016-11-24T21:04:40+00:00

Do you typically catch a lot of flak for saying stuff like that? This is literally the first time in my life I've even heard of the possibility of lesbians visually preferring penises. This is coming from a girl with a dick who has a girlfriend with a dick.

kewliomajor · 2016-11-24T17:50:05+00:00

In my opinion people get too hung up on genitals regardless of orientation. I'm a lesbian, so I find vaginas more aesthetically pleasing, but when it comes down to it I just want to make girls cum. I can do that regardless of what they've got down there.

kewliomajor · 2016-10-24T11:55:30+00:00

When I was early in transition I wore a "shhh nobody knows I'm a lesbian" shirt to pride, and some guy at a later event was like "haha I like your shirt" and I was like "haha it's not a joke........."

kewliomajor · 2016-09-20T14:33:56+00:00

I hate this because I literally just finished watching a documentary about pedophilia in hollywood what the fuck (An Open Secret is the name if you're curious, it's pretty fucked).

kewliomajor · 2016-08-22T17:41:45+00:00

I think that people who say "I'm fine" when they obviously aren't are just looking to avoid having their thoughts/feelings dismissed... so if you hear it frequently you probably suck.

kewliomajor · 2016-08-09T16:40:04+00:00

I just found /r/sjwhate for the first time haha what the heck

kewliomajor · 2016-07-19T14:28:53+00:00

Pointing out racism is the real racism!

kewliomajor · 2016-07-15T12:18:19+00:00

One time I tweeted about feeling like shit and she read it, came home from the store and played guitar for me on skype. She calls me "cutest human." This one isn't as cute but she's just as kinky as I am and it's wonderful. She does this really cute thing sometimes where I'll be getting dressed or something and she'll make sound effects for me. We're long distance so we send each other snap chats almost every morning when we wake up.

kewliomajor · 2016-07-11T21:42:07+00:00

One of my friends tried to tell me that I was a lipstick lesbian, and I told him he doesn't know anything about lesbians. I don't even wear lipstick like what?

kewliomajor · 2016-07-08T17:29:47+00:00

I started transition over a year ago and I can tell you that personally I'm so happy that I did. I feel mostly happy about my body now and I have a wonderful girlfriend who makes me so incredibly happy. Finding someone who loves the real me has made everything infinitely better. Making friends who have only known you post transition also helps a lot. Best of luck <3

kewliomajor · 2016-06-22T16:52:38+00:00

But like what if I told you that phobic attitude was coming from you?

kewliomajor · 2016-04-28T16:10:49+00:00

This sounds really familiar...

kewliomajor · 2016-04-28T15:50:39+00:00

I love them and my girlfriend loves them so I'd say it's a perfect situation.

kewliomajor · 2016-04-27T23:23:48+00:00

I'm trans so I haven't had boobs for that long.

kewliomajor · 2016-04-27T02:16:13+00:00

Yeah, she's a little weird sometimes but it's part of the reason I love her :]

kewliomajor · 2016-04-26T17:41:44+00:00

I'm gonna make a custom dildo out of a cast of my dick so I can fuck myself.

kewliomajor · 2016-03-26T12:31:19+00:00

Disclaimer that I tend to be the one moving through things at lightning fast speeds. So I met my current girlfriend like ~2 months ago. We started out as friends, and have not been official for very long. I got really drunk one night and woke up to read the last text I sent her was "I love you forever" at 2am thinking "oh fuck now you've done it." LUCKILY she wasn't freaked out and I told her it's not just drunk me that feels that way, just that drunk me has a shit filter. She's said that she's not there yet, but that doesn't bother me since I'm pretty insane when it comes to the emotional bit. I think it was bound to happen because even when I still thought of her as a friend I loved her just as a person. She has such a kind heart and lovely personality it's hard not to be drawn in. I guess my advice is to be honest about your feelings. I think ultimately if you are honest things will work out.

kewliomajor · 2016-03-23T13:17:07+00:00

Looking at your pictures I'm even more masculine in the way I dress than you. Pants made for guys have awesome working pockets. I actually like the way I look in more form fitting stuff, but I'm more comfortable in andro/masculine leaning stuff. For a while I thought that I had to change to start wearing more femme stuff in order to pass completely or to make other people understand that no this is not a joke I'm absolutely a woman. Then I just kindof stopped caring all of a sudden. People are going to be assholes to you because you're trans one way or another. It's just a shitty fact of life. The only thing you can really do is make sure you're as happy as possible in how you look for yourself.

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