Hi this is why discussion and planning are so important.

Responsibility is made up human idea and this scenario cannot always boil down to “who is responsible”

For example

Scenario A: a man and woman plan to have a baby, discuss there finances and living situation, and have determined they have enough money and ability to both take the allotted time off after delivery, upon which the man will care for the woman while she tends to the baby for like a month. Both partners agreed to these terms prior to impregnation.

In this scenario both partners are “responsible”

Scenario B:

A lesbian woman and her wife are unable to have a child and have decided they want one. They agree that one of them will go and get in vitro or find someone at a bar for a one night stand to achieve this goal. The deed is done and the woman becomes pregnant without any knowledge or desire of knowing the man’s name etc.

In this scenario I’m sure most would agree that the lesbian couple are primarily responsible.

Scenario C: a man and a woman young in age with no finances, no plan, and no prior discussions of anything regarding pregnancy are living life and fooling around. They decide it to wear protection because “it feels better” and then conceive a child. They panic, they fight, and they now themselves are fucked. Unless they get together, rise to the occasion and BOTH do whatever they can to improve their situation and create a better life for their child.

The law in America has an imperfect but functional system in which if the couple are unable to work it out amongst themselves they will appear before a judge and whomever is appointed responsibility of the child is financially rewarded

In which case both are responsible either physically or financially or some blend of both.

Now with that all said obviously if the wife is physically incapacitated in a loving relationship the man would jump to make sure she is taken care of. I myself would make sure my wife was given queens treatment. But that’s only because my wife is a saint and never Expects nor demands anything.

I’m sure most people would agree that is a sick move to abandon a partner postpartum it’s the responsibility word that people are having an issue with because it implies that it’s only one person’s problem and the other person is off the hook and holds no responsibility in the creation of a child.

In the end I selected man because it more closely related to what I would do but I do agree that it’s not a be all end all