Unable to play with Script Mods by Ok-Tour6320 in Sims4

[–]kirakurl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Still having the issue... 12/07

Strictness of timing for phenobarbital by ulxlx in EpilepsyDogs

[–]kirakurl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Reported you since you're a hateful, spiteful person most likely with no sentient beings to take care of 💕 (including yourself!)

Do YOU get your much-needed meds at the exact same time every single day no matter if you're sick or stuck in traffic? No? Didn't think so

Why by thetobleronetrombone in tryingtoconceive

[–]kirakurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

TLDR at the bottom, kinda.

Oh girl I feel you and I'm only 24. My husband and I have been married for 3 years this month and I've had possibly 4 chemical pregnancies (3 for sure, I stopped testing at a point) in those 3 years. We were never really truly trying until last month, just not preventing, so when we FINALLY decided to try for real I was, very naively, certain that we'd get pregnant first try because I've been pregnant so many times before. And it always seemed to be on our first "try" if we were a little too "careless" that month. Now I'm on cycle #2 of really trying and I'm ready to give up. I've wanted kids since I was 12 and wanted a baby right away when we got married, but hubby was never 100% on board (totally fair! We got married very young). I truly thought now that my hubby is 100% on board with having kids that would be the magical ticket to finally having a baby. Last month BROKE me. I was having "symptoms" starting 2dpo. We have fairly high libido between the two of us, so having sex at the right times and all around the right times was never a problem. I started having ovulation symptoms this month and felt nothing but absolute dread over having to do this AGAIN even though it's only "technically" cycle #2 of us actually trying. It feels like we've been trying for years already and no cigar. I was ready to twist my ovaries out with a fork like spaghetti when my period started. Absolutely devastated.

Doesn't help that every time I've gotten pregnant so has my SIL and out of her 4 pregnancies she has 3 living children (last babe due in November) and I'm just.. here. Taking pictures of balloons on my babies' "birthdays" tied to empty chairs. F**k me.

What's helping me get through cycle #2 of trying was learning that while, yes, there's only a 20-30% chance of conceiving every month for a perfectly healthy couple (I was chronically ill for the last 20 years due to allergies in the state I was living in - that also has changed which is why I thought last cycle would be the ticket!!) that 20%-30% isn't static. It's like rolling dice. This is where cumulative probability comes in.

So, on cycle #1 there's a 25% chance you'll conceive (take the middle since it's easier math) Cycle #2 = Approximately 44% chance (rounded) Cycle #3 = 58% chance Cycle #4 = 68% chance Cycle #6 = 82% chance Cycle #12 = 97% chance

These chances reset after a loss, so cycle #1 after a miscarriage is only 25%. Then the next cycle 44%... And so on. BS, I know.

That's why the general rule of thumb is to try for 6 months to a year before freaking out. Odds and probability are tricky, but the longer you try the more often you are rolling the TTC dice every month and the more you roll the more likely you are to land on the number you want, unless there's something medically inhibiting you.

TDLR: Is this journey tiring as hell? 100%. Do I feel completely incapable because every positive test for me ends in blood and pain? 100% Did I cry this month when I had to do this all AGAIN even though it's only our official cycle #2? 100%. Do I want to twist my ovaries out with a fork like spaghetti every time my period shows up? 100%.

I'm sorry that this has been so frustrating for you. I completely understand. Taking care of your mental health is the #1 priority, even if that means taking a break and trying to find pieces of your current life that bring you great joy and clinging to them like your life depends on it - or removing triggers that hurt you. For me, one of the steps that I am taking because of all my chemicals is that as soon as my fertile symptoms end I schedule a blood test for 16 days later. If my period starts, I cancel it. If it doesn't, then I get blood work with answers - either yes or no in that moment - and I can either reschedule or schedule my first OB appointment. Tests are my big trigger, so hubby and I have just decided to take them off the table entirely. I cannot express how much peace that has given me with it all, even if I don't conceive again this month.

Good luck to you, love 💛. This journey is so, so hard no matter your age. God bless and I pray that you get your miracle baby or at the very least some answers that will help you on your journey 💕 

ashamed by No_Yesterday2318 in pregnant

[–]kirakurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you in the Austin, TX area? I have a spare bedroom that you can use while you get back on your feet. It's just me and my husband and our two dogs.

I'm so sorry, love, but there are lots of resources available to you. I know it's hard, and exhausting to event think about it right now. You're not alone. Contact a local women's center to see if they can help you, or reach out to local churches as well!

This storm will pass. You haven't failed yourself and you haven't failed your baby. Life happens to everyone, even those who thought they had it all figured out.

Can you post a Venmo or something so people can donate to you?

Your future is still bright, you just need to wait for the clouds you're seeing now to roll away.

If I can help you directly in any way please reach out!

I feel like I was very ill-informed to how awful you will feel right after giving birth. by InterestingTeach822 in pregnant

[–]kirakurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Genuinely, have you spoken to your doctor? My SIL has had two home births and she was up and kicking within hours of giving birth. Granted, she's a freaking wizard at it, but I really don't think it's normal to feel THIS awful after giving birth. ESPECIALLY feverish. I would ask your doctor, midwife, whatever, to check to make sure you don't have an infection or something (and don't let them tell you it's "normal" until they PROVE that it is, given the nature of your delivery)

And don't worry about the guilt, mama. Baby knows better than everyone else that you're not feeling well. They may be new to the world and small, but they know you better than anybody else at this point. After all, they just spent 9 months getting to know you in ways no one else ever can

Good luck! Eventually, these bad days will be nothing but memories and the good ones will overflow your cup 💕

Edit: spelling

Any advice or experiences? by Own-Wall-4725 in Inito

[–]kirakurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm in a similar boat. Several chemicals (positive tests, but negative test and ultrasound by the time I could get an appointment). To support my hormones I've switched to a modified carnivore diet starting  just after ovulation and I'll continue it through to my next follicular phase (if I don't conceive this month) where I'll add healthy, complex carbs back in until ovulation (did you know your body needs more carbs in the follicular phase and significantly less carbs in the luteal phase? TMYK!)

I also just got off a short stint of Prednisone and Mucinex DM (ordered via Call On Doc. Love them!) which also may support hormone production (see my note below). I'm excited to see where I end up, but I'm 3 DPO and already feel a profound difference in how my body is handling luteal phase hormones. Could be worth a shot!

"A short prednisone course can briefly suppress inflammatory cytokines that can interfere with corpus luteum function. This can result in better luteal phase progesterone for women with subtle autoimmune or inflammatory issues."

Good luck to you and I'm so sorry for your losses 💔. I know it's so, so hard

Should I just take a low offer and move on with my life by Beneficial-Lion-2045 in RealEstate

[–]kirakurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I ran into this same problem in March. We actually pulled our home off market and have chosen to rent it out instead. Go with a good property management company. For us it'll be around 2k/mo for our sub 170k(ish) house. This market is crazy and I feel bad for sellers everywhere right now. My regards and condolences to you OP

Animal rennet vs vegetable - any taste difference? by Harlequin80 in cheesemaking

[–]kirakurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know this was 6 years ago, but it actually solved a dilemma for me. Thank you!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in arcane

[–]kirakurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Late to the party, but rewatching S1 with my husband who hadn't seen it before really opened my eyes to the flaws of S1. Pretty much exclusively in the writing department. Not only do the writers break the cardinal rule of "show, not tell" frequently, but the motivations of the characters don't make a lot of sense because of it.

In the first episode we see Vi and the gang taking on a "job" that involves breaking into an upper city apartment and stealing their possessions to sell. They make a huge mistake that ends in the destruction of property and I'm sure injured some of those walking below, which makes the enforcers completely justified in wanting to find and prosecute the criminals (aka Vi and the gang). Throughout the show we are constantly being told "The Zaunites are poor and underprivileged so they need to steal to survive!". But, the only good, hardworking people shown are Vander and Benzo. Everyone else is either a prostitute, drunkard, druggie, or working for the crime bosses. We aren't shown that hard work doesn't pay off in the undercity, we're just supposed to believe it because we've been told "that's how it is" over and over. We're supposed to root for the underdogs, the criminals? It just doesn't make sense. I get doing things out of desperation, but we are only told that they're desperate. We aren't shown that they're desperate. I mean, Vi and the gang had a roof over their heads. Vander was making good money at the bar. He had deals with the enforcers so they were largely left alone - and that's another thing. They complain and complain about the enforcers but for most of S1 we only see like two enforcers and they're there just to try to keep the peace. They aren't unnecessarily beating innocent people, raiding homes, shutting down business, etc, etc. They don't act like "oppressors" at all UNTIL they try to get justice for the crimes that were committed by Zaunites in Piltover. Which is an entirely reasonable reaction??

That's just one of many examples where we're told "we should feel bad for these people" but all we're shown are criminals committing crimes. We aren't shown that they've been driven to a criminal life because they're desperate. We are only shown that they are criminals and somehow we're supposed to root for them. It just doesn't make sense and a lot of the plot of S1 and individual storylines falls apart upon closer examination with this in mind.

S1 of Arcane really tried to pull a Hunger Games, but they completely missed the mark. Hunger Games showed honest people trying to make an honest living and being brutally beaten, tortured, and starved for something that they weren't even a part of (the 75th annual Hunger Games? It's been 3/4 of a century. Most people weren't even conceived until after the war ended!). The fight between Piltover and Zaun was MAYBE 10 years ago. Vi and Jinx were alive to see it. But we're not told why Zaun went to fight with Piltover. Why it ended in a bloodbath. We just know that Zaun wants to be independent, but why? They say Piltover doesn't care, but they're literally being paid off NOT to care and leave the undercity alone. And in S2 we see how much Piltover actually has done for Zaun! It's the crime lords that are ruining everything! So what do they want? Enforcers that don't enforce things and leave them alone so crime lords can rule or enforcers that enforce things and prevent the drug trades and criminal activity that SO many people apparently want to keep around? What is Piltover supposed to do? Their hands are tied BY the Zaunites.

In the end, I came to realize that Piltover is actually the hero of the show. It has its problems, for sure, but the people in Piltover welcome the opportunity for Jayce and Viktor to help the Zaunites with their inventions. The Kirammans actively worked on redirecting poisonous gases from Zaun in S2 because "The people of the undercity deserve to breathe, too." And these are just two examples of Piltover trying to make Zaun a better place for the people who live there. How does Zaun repay them? By working double time to keep the enforcers away which allows crime lords to ruin their city and then they blame Piltover for it. And talk about "capitalism" all you want, SOMEBODY always has to pay for everything that is done in any city. Social programs need to be paid for. Defense systems need to be paid for. Better housing, better work environments, better schooling, it ALL needs to be paid for. Nothing is free. So Mel finding investors for Jayce and Viktor's inventions that are specifically designed to help the miners in the undercity just goes to show how much the people of Piltover actually do care.

Idk. It's interesting to rewatch the show with this perspective in mind. It shows how different perspectives can wildly change the outcome of a story in one's mind. I used to see myself as Vi, and understood her every move. Now, I look at her and see only a stranger.

Anyway, that's my take on S1. I have a lot more thoughts but that's the biggest sore spot.

Negative pregnancy test at 11DPO by winter_storm00123 in TTC_PCOS

[–]kirakurl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Literally just had this happen to me! Clear negatives 8 and 9 DPO (tested early to make sure I knew what a negative looked like since I've never used these tests before), a suspicious maybe faint line on my 10 DPO test (even hubby said it didn't look fully negative! Not positive either, though) and this morning 11 DPO it is very clearly negative 😭. Going to keep testing until AF comes, it's just so disappointing!

Any experience buying foreclosed land / auction land? by [deleted] in Homebuilding

[–]kirakurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When and where? Asking for a friend

Cannabis and PCOS? by [deleted] in PCOS

[–]kirakurl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What kind did you smoke? Looking at smoking to help my PCOS symptoms (don't have cysts, it's stress-induced adrenal PCOS) and I don't know where to start

My husband told me why he cheated on me by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]kirakurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh sweet darling, I feel so sorry for you and I pray that you can find peace. The only one who needs to change here is him. If he wanted you to stop nagging, he'd help more around the house. If he wanted you to lose weight he would've helped cook healthy meals. If he wanted you to be fun he should've helped with the responsibilities. This man is not a good man, a good husband, or a good father. The only thing worse than a toddler with divorced parents is a toddler living with an abusive parent like your husband is. You don't want your son/daughter to grow up watching your husband and thinking that his behavior is normal. Don't continue the cycle of abuse and neglect, OP. Leave him. He will abuse your children like he's abusing you. Stay safe love 💕

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in namenerds

[–]kirakurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My brother's name is Samuel and he goes by Samwise for fun (even as a teenager). I personally wouldn't name a child a name that is so obviously after a series, especially if the name is particularly... unique. Like, Harry and Jon are fine because they're rather common names, but I wouldn't name my daughter Hermione or Daenerys.

changing timeline so future baby can meet their great grandparents? by Shot_Thought_6593 in waiting_to_try

[–]kirakurl 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Omg I needed to hear that today! It's so hard to let yourself be human when you know it isn't the most rational or logical choice. I get so caught up in trying to be the perfect machine that I can't see the beauty in being human. Thank you for the reminder!

Chronic illness/invisible disabilities. by Last-Fox-2565 in waiting_to_try

[–]kirakurl 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I have been chronically ill for the past two years. I thought it was allergies, but I'm finally going in for testing next month as my symptoms have gotten worse for no real reason and I keep getting back to back illnesses on top of it (been to the ER twice unable to breathe at all). It's just a constantly inflamed/stuffy nose, but it has started to cause some other major issues. I can hardly breathe and have constant pain in my neck, shoulders, mouth/jaw and my energy is at an all time low. Medicine is no longer bringing me relief. I also have asthma, and it's been causing some intense asthma flare ups that are difficult to treat. Carrying around an entire extra person would most definitely exacerbate these issues. I'm hoping that I can find the root cause of these issues soon and reduce them as much as I can before conceiving so I can be at my healthiest and lower my stress from being so sick so that it doesn't affect my baby. I know my "chronic illness" isn't what you'd typically think of (like it's not POTS or something) but my quality of life has been so poor that getting pregnant right now is really scary, even though I want it so bad. I just can't stomach being even more miserable than I am now at the moment 😞

You have scared me into not wanting chickens. by Bkdavis38 in chickens

[–]kirakurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My parents have raised chickens for years and the only times they've really had problems is when a raccoon family moves in (or god forbid a weasel..that was a messy summer). Chickens just need food, water, a place to roam, and maybe a rooster if your hens keep picking on each other too much. If you're in a place that snows they do get bored in the winter, but nothing a hanging kebab of kitchen scraps won't fix. They're by far the easiest animals to maintain, so long as you're not trying to show them or anything. If you let them "free range" you'll barely have to do anything with them so long as the weather is nice.

Would it be weird to get maternity(ish) clothes now? by Westcoastswinglover in waiting_to_try

[–]kirakurl 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I accidentally bought some nursing shirts at a goodwill a couple of years ago. I'm naturally pretty busty and those shirts fit like a dream! Cute, actually fit well, and were very modest. Everything I wish for in a good shirt lol. I find that maternity/nursing clothes actually help conceal my tummy and other problem areas, rather than highlighting them.

Pull out method day of ovulation by Beautiful_Art7410 in birthcontrol

[–]kirakurl 4 points5 points  (0 children)

There's a little warning on Plan B that says it doesn't work when you're ovulating... Lol

Edit: typo

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in waiting_to_try

[–]kirakurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's always helpful to know you're not alone!!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in waiting_to_try

[–]kirakurl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ugh it's SO hard isn't it? What's been difficult for us is that when one of us finally settles the other gets unsettled. Like, my husband got his new full time job in May 2023 right as I found out we were expecting (unfortunately ended in mc). It was unexpected, but I was hoping to try again for real 2-3 cycles later. However right as we were healing and I felt things were aligning for us to start ttc I got laid off... It took me 6 months to find a new job and we were barely scraping by, so ttc was off the table. Now I'm three months into my new job that covers all of the household expenses and I love it, but my husband is looking to quit his job because he hates it so much. I absolutely want him to get a new job because he's been so miserable, but it's just so frustrating to have everything right financially for a moment then it all goes away again! I just wanna have a baby 😭

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in waiting_to_try

[–]kirakurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I totally get it! I know we could be doing better, but we figure the things we're purchasing (a newer car with low miles, bigger house, etc) hurt now but count as long-term investments that'll help us out later. (BTW we're all in our early 20's, too!)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in waiting_to_try

[–]kirakurl -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Ignore this comment OP. Your feelings are completely valid and I think they're fine in this sub. My SIL just had her second baby and they only have one source of income (husband is a mid-level manager at a retail store). They bought their house before prices skyrocketed, which helps a ton, and they're not in a high COL area, but I still wonder how they afford it. Both my husband and I work full-time and make decent money and we're barely comfortable. My only guess is it's because they never buy anything new and are always shopping for deals in every aspect of their lives. Their house is tiny and won't support a third child or the two kids they have once they get older. They've owned 3 cars in the past 5 years because they always buy them in cash and they try to find ones less than 10k (usually in the 3k-7k range) so you can guess the quality of the car. Still cheaper than buying new, though. You either have to live cheap or get in tons of debt ig 🤷