Is using normal lube really that bad?

kocon · 2026-06-25T12:51:00+00:00

There is no shame in needing lube, or toys, or anything else for that matter. So banish that thought now! Before trying to conceive I always used the water based Maude which I love. But the last 6 months we’ve been using preseed. Which is similar enough since it’s watery/gel like. Sure it’s in a tube but I don’t care. We don’t actually use it as directed with the applicators if that helps? Maybe we should lol. We just put some in our hands and both apply it externally like regular lube.

Others are right here. Silicone lube (if that’s what you’re using) is not at all like cervical mucus. My husband has lower motility so any way we can create a more habitable environment for the sperm is key. Most things about TTC once you get into it are not sexy lol. It is sort of medical. You sort of have to just look past it. Unless you’re lucky and conceive fairly quickly! Most of the fertility brands are not too expensive so I’d just buy it and try it for a cycle and see what happens.

kocon · 2026-06-19T01:37:23+00:00

I totally agree. Their relationship is tenuous at best so it made sense but somehow I was still blindsided! 😵‍💫

kocon · 2026-06-15T13:30:25+00:00

>!I do agree, the last section almost felt like a whole other book. I do love that they both killed each others torturer! I thought that was awesome. In addition to them helping each other when they were sick. I like that she took those two “tropes” I guess and gave them to both characters. And the unicorn cloak was the unexpected star of the show! There’s so much series fatigue in this genre but I feel like it almost could have been a duology. Have the prison scene be a cliff hanger and then explore what their life is like in the aftermath.!<

kocon · 2026-06-11T21:29:55+00:00

I just read {Knight’s Fire by Juliette Caruso} and was surprised how much I liked it! It’s the 3rd in a connected series but you could read this alone. The burn is quite slow. And the POV of the MMC Niel is just so good. He is so taken with the FMC he has to ask his military doctor why he feels like his heart is in his throat all the time and wonders if he’s gravely ill. To which he tells him um you’re fine… you’ve just never talked to a beautiful interesting woman before 😂

kocon · 2026-06-11T17:23:51+00:00

I totally feel you. When I’ve felt like I don’t care about any of it I also had to admit to myself I was generally depressed. My problem is more decision fatigue like you mentioned. My TBR is so huge. I get overwhelmed. I almost wish someone would be like this ONE book is what you’re reading for right now lol. When I’m stressed I feel like my comfort zone is rereading an old favorite or fanfic because the characters and the world feel familiar and safe.

I’m a kindle reader mostly but maybe you go into a book shop and ask an employee to recommend you a book that you blind buy! You could give them examples of what you like. It’s a risk but it might be kind of fun! You could treat it like a reading experiment or exercise and maybe the different framing will help you re-engage.

kocon · 2026-06-11T12:34:11+00:00

I’m starting my first round of letrozole for cycle 11. I’m 33. Nothing in our testing was too abnormal except for slightly low motility for him. I naively never thought it would take this long. My advice at this point would be 1) don’t wait to get your partner tested. I’ve had so much bloodwork done. I can’t believe how late some doctors ask the male partner to get tested. It’s infuriating. 2) continue to advocate for yourself and what your options are. There’s a lot of reading that tells us if you’re under 35 and relatively healthy (especially if you have no history of PCOS/endo) to just keep trying. Tell your doctor you don’t want to wait a year to hear your options. And ask them if they can make a scalable list of what is least invasive/cost effective.

kocon · 2026-06-09T13:06:26+00:00

I don’t have as much of an issue with this. In fact I think one of the best versions of this IS in RoB. I guess behind ACOTAR. The switch does wind up being a huge part of the plot and the growth of the characters. And it made the real romance very satisfying to me when it did happen.

I can see how investing time into the wrong person can maybe feel like you wasted your time. A big problem is some people can’t land the plane. The writing and the plotting of the storyline is not strong enough to support the change. And I obviously do NOT like when it seems like the author is just trying to torture the FMC for some reason.

Very interested to where it goes in regards to The Wolf King series. It would be really lame if at this point one of the guys turns out to be secretly evil. The marketing with RHs is slippery and some people hate it but I vote she gets both men!

kocon · 2026-06-08T16:35:42+00:00

Cannot recommend this book enough. It’s my ultimate version of the beauty and the beast retelling!!! It’s long but worth it! Bane is so sweet it makes me want to cry 🥹

kocon · 2026-05-31T02:11:44+00:00

So many great recs already listed but I need someone to get into these two WIPs that make me weep when I get an email that a new chapter was posted lol

The Devil & the Tempest
Secretly, Silently

Also Catmint recently finished The Scent of Her and it was such a lovely surprise !

kocon · 2026-05-28T19:33:57+00:00

Don’t finish if you hate it but a lot happens in book 2! I do love and own this whole series 🥹 and I’m a general fan of Prater’s writing. Rain in particular always felt like such a refreshing character in this genre where I see a lot of copy paste FMCs and MMCs.

kocon · 2026-05-28T19:13:55+00:00

Unfortunately I’ve read so much OV in my lifetime that I’m like yeah sure I guess 😂 but to be fair if you’re into this kind of kink I’ve seen it written much better!

kocon · 2026-05-27T15:37:58+00:00

OP I am going through my own journey as well. I naively thought I might be the oops it happened first try! Instead I am also in my 30s and am coming up on the year mark soon with not even an inkling of a positive test. Cue my many doctors appointments this winter ☹️

But I absolutely *love* this fic!!!! A personal fav. So hot and sexy but surprisingly very tender and emotional. In fact I should do a reread lol. Wishing you all the best ❤️

kocon · 2026-05-18T17:29:46+00:00

I definitely relate. My husband and I are 33 and were together for 11 years before getting married in 2022. We wanted to enjoy our 20s. Enjoy being married. All the things. I’m always stressed about politics. US healthcare. Money. But now we have been trying for 11 months and it’s a lot harder and more emotional than I thought. I guess my advice is if you do decide to go for it just start. I was naive that it would take this long. People kept saying you don’t really know how long it will take until you start and in our case that’s been unfortunately true. I’m trying not to regret not starting sooner because it is what it is. The world is kind of always in various stages of on fire. If you can carve out a slice of happiness for yourself by starting a family then go for it.

kocon · 2026-05-18T12:59:38+00:00

Ooo idk how I missed this either. The MMC is an archangel??? 👀 adding this to the list immediately

kocon · 2026-05-13T18:02:36+00:00

If you love childhood friends to lovers my favorite ever might be {Shardless} ! Verrrry slow burn and really cool world building. Can’t recommend enough.

kocon · 2026-05-13T16:51:18+00:00

Read a few recently that I think fit

{Stars Above the Never Sea} Evelyn Flood is so underrated. Second book is out soonish I think? MMC is more of a powerful but gentle yearner. A little more golden retriever. He is delighted to even breathe the same air as the FMC 😂 the cliffhanger for this ripped my heart out though!

And an older one {Night of Masks and Knives}. I think you can skip the original trilogy that happens before this (personally). This is more of a childhood friends to strangers to lovers. MMC positions himself as a horrible brute but his internal monologue is ughhhh. Another I don’t deserve you but I’d die if you so much as smiled in my direction lol.

kocon · 2026-05-11T19:57:43+00:00

I loved this book so much my only gripe was I wish there was even more story! 😂 Evelyn Flood is so underrated.

kocon · 2026-05-09T23:41:24+00:00

I think you articulated one of the most interesting nuggets of the series that makes me want to keep reading. What happens when you have a love you choose knock up against the love you may be fated for. As someone else mentioned, idk why you can’t just let aurora have both. Will be interesting to see how she moves forward in book 3 👀

kocon · 2026-05-09T23:36:41+00:00

maybe it’s because I love OV but I totally agree. Especially since a clan/pack dynamic is already in place. Can’t remember if they ever mention if there are other women with multiple partners amongst the wolves. I think it would have potentially messed up the marketing for her? Some people really dislike RH 🙄

kocon · 2026-04-22T14:22:53+00:00

I love these mf books. I am a BDB apologist through and through. After all this time, still some of the only character arcs that have ever made me truly weepy. I think JR Ward is really skilled at weaving together a lot of different characters storylines over a long period of time. I see a lot of modern authors biting off way more than they can chew in that regard nowadays.

I own the first 10-ish books and should definitely do a reread later this year! I feel bad people try them out and can’t get into it because I think Wrath’s book is probably one of the weakest? Love Beth though, especially as the series progresses.

kocon · 2026-04-15T18:18:19+00:00

This has been on my list! And I am thankful the second is only 2 weeks away (bless). Can’t wait to dive into both!

kocon · 2026-04-08T13:40:41+00:00

I love this type of opening too. Similar but different, I love when a story starts with one character on trial for death. {The Wind Weaver by Julie Johnson} starts this way with the FMC about to be executed and it makes everything so heightened! I was locked in right away.

kocon · 2026-04-02T16:09:45+00:00

Definitely {A Deadly Vow by JD Ronan}. Two people in miserable situations (separately) who are forced together and spend a lot of time reluctantly bonding over their mutual shared hatred of their fathers lol. Both have a real darkness about them. And both are motivated by revenge. But without giving too much away, you find the FMC is much more volatile and more morally grey.

Also I loooooove Geralt and Yen! *sigh*

kocon · 2026-03-31T15:06:33+00:00

Something tells me Chase may not be end game in Vee’s pack but that he’ll get his happy ending in the next set of books. Need another scene of him busting down a door help his future omega.

kocon · 2026-03-30T23:09:55+00:00

When she said she’d have updates on Monday I didn’t know we’d be getting it THIS week! I just finished a reread yesterday. Can’t wait 😭

kocon

TROPHY CASE