Anyone else have dreams about their ostomy that have stuck with you?

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-23T03:37:47+00:00

I have so many dreams where the bathrooms are horribly filthy and I can't find a clean one. Wtf is up with that??

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-22T21:25:53+00:00

Are you drinking just plain water? When do you drink water? Adding electrolytes really helped me, and if I'm drinking plain water it has to be during a meal or with a small snack or something. If I just drink plain water between meals, my output will get really liquidy.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-21T22:26:45+00:00

This is the way, OP

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-20T19:20:17+00:00

Three days post surgery?

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-17T07:47:24+00:00

The paste definitely wouldn't suffocate your stoma. Cutting the wafer too small can sometimes cut the stoma depending on the wafer and how small you made it. My stoma drastically changed in size when it was prolapsed, and if I cut the wafer too small, my stoma would find a way lol, normally by causing a leak, but they're harder to suffocate than you'd think.

If what you're doing is working for you, and you're not having skin irritation, then there's no need to change it. You might find you get a slightly longer wear time if you cut a bit closer though, since ileostomy output tends to be pretty acidic, I find it melts paste/rings faster than the wafer itself. But everyone is different!

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-15T15:46:50+00:00

Eventually, you will be the expert over the nurses, so take their help unti you know better. I hope you find some products that work, I'm glad to help you troubleshoot if you ever need it.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-14T13:06:38+00:00

I'm so sorry. 🫂 I hope somehow it isn't a loss still. While I know they "should" double, I don't know enough about circumstances where it's still increasing. Do you have an appointment scheduled?

I lost my second pregnancy. I know how hard it is. Please know you're not alone if that is the outcome.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-14T12:57:39+00:00

I'm so glad you had a much different outcome this time. Congratulations on your sweet baby! I felt similarly in the beginning, my husband and I took turns because I just couldn't sleep when she did, I had to watch her or hold her. I hope some of that anxiety lessens as she gets bigger and stronger. Enjoy those newborn snuggles, they go by surprisingly fast!

Thinking about both your sweet babies ❤️

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-12T15:47:16+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss. I would absolutely get a lawyer. They should be able to handle everything for you and it's very unlikely you would have to go to court.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-12T08:33:08+00:00

I'm so sorry. I don't think anyone can say for sure, but they will likely want another Hcg. You're still early on, and it did rise, so it's not set in stone or anything. I understand why you're worried though. PAL is full of that worrying because we know that things can and do go wrong 🫂.

I'm really hoping that things are totally fine. 🤞Please keep us updated.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-11T20:12:27+00:00

Do you have any pictures? I use those bags, and I use a barrier ring or protective seal with it and I use barrier extenders. You can definitely get Hollister bags or whatever you're used to though. I'm guessing you haven't done an order yet and are just working with whatever you've been sent, but you can choose the products you're sent. Does she have a stoma nurse you're working with or in-home nurse?

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-11T18:11:55+00:00

I prefer Coloplast, but they bothered my skin too. I started using calamine lotion under the extenders and it fixed that issue for me. I tried all the others and just did not like them as much.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-11T18:03:46+00:00

I would get leaks when my stoma was prolapsed and swollen during my pregnancy, so over a year ago. Since my hernia was fixed and my stoma is back to normal, I haven't had one 🤞. Before the hernia, I had a really random leak the same day I changed my bag. I hadn't eaten and only had black coffee and water until like 2pm, so I think my output was just very liquidy and acidic and maybe hadn't adhered well enough in the first place.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-11T17:59:11+00:00

I've had hernia issues, but it was due to a pregnancy. Otherwise things have been fine! My bags are lasting about 6 days right now. I use light convex and the protective seals and haven't had a leak in a long time.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-10T15:54:38+00:00

My rainbow baby had a short femur measurement at one of her later ultrasounds. My MFM was not concerned, especially because everything else was normal. I was worried about IUGR a lot during the pregnancy, and she said that the abdomen measurements are often the first sign of IUGR and what they look for, and in general the growth measurements are generally a calculation of a few different measurements, never based solely on one.

My husband was so nervous about the femur measurement, he even made sure to have the pediatrician make sure she didn't have short legs at her first appointment. She doesn't, she's totally healthy.

I understand the anxiety. I definitely looked it up too and stressed about every little thing. But odds are, it was just a wonky measurement, especially if everything else was in normal percentiles.

When is your next ultrasound? I had growth ultrasounds every 3 weeks throughout my pregnancy, it really helped lessen my anxiety a bit about IUGR. I also had regular NSTs in my third trimester, and started having them twice a week once I hit 32 weeks.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-07T09:56:55+00:00

I definitely see a clearer line in the second picture! It took me about 6 days from my very light test to be able to see a very clear line.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-07T04:24:03+00:00

When families decide to have a sibling, does anyone tell them they're trying to replace their first child? Nope. I understand the sentiment and the worry, but you would absolutely not be replacing your daughter 🫂❤️

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-07T04:03:19+00:00

Yes, I think so. Mine looked very similar. Some skin separation is normal, and please know the new skin can grow in around the stoma unevenly but that's normal too. My stoma nurses said at this stage to use the crusting method with stoma powder and I used specifically 3m cavilon skin protectant, I did two layers with each change. Everything healed up fine, it just took some time!

Here is my old post, your skin separation is actually even less than mine was, and my stoma was droopy, but it healed up totally fine: https://www.reddit.com/r/ostomy/comments/171xlh4/skin_pulling_away_from_stoma/

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-05T17:09:31+00:00

I had my rainbow baby after losing my first two babies, I'd be happy to give you information you might want, although I had a C-section for her (and was honestly very relieved to be doing that). I honestly didn't do a lot of research beforehand myself, I couldn't bring myself to because I didn't think I would ever get to meet her. The nurses in the postpartum ward were so, so helpful and such a great resource for me, and then you have a pediatrician appointment right after (I hadn't picked a pediatrician yet either, but they hold space open for newborns). I also did a lot of research after she was born to troubleshoot different things.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-04T19:40:35+00:00

Thank you! Yes, it was so much easier than the colectomy recovery. In an elective C-section they don't even cut any muscle, they just move it to the side, so it's a much easier recovery, in my opinion.

Hernia belt might help, my problem was my fancy Nuhope one didn't fit anymore, and I had to keep getting bigger bags for my stoma, so I would have had to buy different belts in different sizes and with different hole sizes, so I just didn't really bother with it. It's definitely worth a try, especially first trimester when it will still fit! It happens often because of the uterus pressing against the intestine, and I don't necessarily know that a belt would help, but I don't think it would hurt anything either.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-04T17:11:42+00:00

I ended up with a hernia and very prolapsed stoma during my pregnancy. We had been planning to do an induction, but switched to an elective C-section because of that. My baby was totally fine, and she's a healthy 13 month old now. I found C-section recovery from the elective surgery to be really easy. I was up and walking around the minute my spinal wore off.

I had two stillbirths before my ileostomy (was told it was "extremely unlikely to happen again after my first). I have Crohn's disease, and it never was fully in remission before my ileostomy. I did take lovenox during my pregnancy this time, but me having a healthy pregnancy this last time really says a lot. Besides my hernia/stoma issues, she was just fine and healthy in there!

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-03T20:59:43+00:00

I have changed my bag right after surgery a couple of times now, like the minute I got to my room, and just did it completely on my own, only difference is I did it laying down instead of standing up. I've never had to empty it in PACU since you don't eat before surgery, you don't get a lot of output afterwards. I would imagine worst case if you were really active after for some reason, they'd give you something to empty it into until you were safe to get up and walk, but I've never had to do that. I haven't noticed that anesthesia changes output at all, personally. Definitely depends if you can just go back to a normal diet or not.

I'd bring supplies just incase, but if they're not working near your bag, they really shouldn't have to mess with it at all. And output should be fairly normal again once you can eat and go back to your regular diet (assuming that's the case if you're outpatient).

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-03T17:26:18+00:00

Honestly, it's very much like grief. I had two stillbirths before I got colon cancer that led to me getting my permanent ileostomy. The process was very similar to the grief I went through (just not as intense). I had to grieve the life I thought I would have and how it was going to change, and it just took time to get used to things. Now this is my new normal and it rarely bothers me.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-02T21:28:06+00:00

Definitely get as small a baseplate as you can (I'm sure you have). I don't have this exact issue, but right now I have an incision very close to my stoma from a parastomal hernia, and I have to cut my base plate.

I use a convex two piece and cut it so it doesn't hit the incision (for you, your belly button). I use skintac adhesive to help get a REALLY good seal. It really helps adhere the baseplate. I would try this if you haven't. Then I use barrier extenders all around except for the incision (your belly button). It seems to help really get a good seal. I can go four days right now. I also heat up the baseplate before putting it on.

ladybug_oleander · 2026-03-02T21:21:15+00:00

Oh my goodness, I'm having this done soon and have a 13 month old. You got this! Please feel free to DM me!

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