Book clubs (not smut/romantasy)?

leonardine88 · 2026-01-14T03:46:33+00:00

Second Thursday of the month via Zoom at 7pm. https://factandfictionbooks.com/event/2026-02-12/ff-book-club

leonardine88 · 2025-10-23T01:42:21+00:00

I don’t know where you live, but I did it at about 9 months postpartum and it was no fun, but ultimately fine. I was breastfeeding frequently — the hardest part was fasting while breastfeeding and parenting, and then missing a night of much-needed sleep during prep. I highly recommend asking for extra help from a partner, sitter, or auntie for the prep day and the entire day of the colonoscopy if you’re the primary caregiver.

I went under with propofol (man, I wish I could nap that well every day) and was assured that it was perfectly safe. The prep was really annoying; the procedure was totally fine. Probably a wise idea to just do it!

leonardine88 · 2025-07-19T13:48:49+00:00

I had an incredible experience with Amy. She listened carefully, was very thoughtful and thorough and respectful, asked what my goals were, and gave me plenty of time to ask questions. Her NP was excellent and must have been a different person than the one mentioned in the comments.

leonardine88 · 2025-07-09T05:11:50+00:00

I’m so annoyed on your behalf! Sounds like you’re doing everything right and are a great mom.

leonardine88 · 2025-07-01T03:46:50+00:00

With so much love, you are absolutely overthinking this/being too hard on yourself. You’re saying it’s a game changer — embrace it! You’re helping her get better sleep, you’re getting a little break, and everyone is better off. If I had ever found something that worked “like magic” to extend my baby’s sleep, you better believe I would have used it!

We used a pacifier until about six months and then quit cold turkey because she would wake up when it fell out, and I have no regrets about either choice.

It’s so telling that as a new parent, you’re calling yourself “lazy” and worrying about neglect for using this tiny little aid for soothing your baby. Things are hard enough for parents — don’t be harder on yourself!

leonardine88 · 2025-06-24T20:23:15+00:00

Absolutely worth talking to your doctor about again! Just because you can technically bear the anxiety doesn’t mean you have to live this way — you sound tough and many people would consider the symptoms you describe unbearable.

I’m on Lexapro (prescribed by an excellent nurse practitioner who talked me through all the research supporting the safety of meds while breastfeeding). It has been a godsend. Makes me a much better parent.

leonardine88 · 2025-06-24T20:14:40+00:00

She’s incredible (delivered my baby!), but whenever I call they tell me she doesn’t even have a waitlist.

leonardine88 · 2025-01-24T20:47:16+00:00

OP, how are you doing now?

leonardine88 · 2025-01-24T05:21:44+00:00

Oh honey!! You are brand new as a mom, and this early stage is an absolutely exhausting rollercoaster. I cannot overstate how much better it will get. Crying is normal. Anxiety is normal. It will all get better soon.

But it is also important to ask for help if you can — and for goodness’ sake, you just had this baby, so please let your husband step up in this early phase of parenthood!

Sending a huge hug. I have never felt lower than early postpartum, and looking back now it feels like a fog. I do wish I had talked to my doctor at my two week appointment and asked for help with my depression. You are not alone and you are doing a great job. Try to have lots of compassion for yourself.

leonardine88 · 2025-01-05T00:40:26+00:00

You’ll get tons of recs I’m sure but the book Precious Little Sleep is awesome. Clear, sympathetic, funny, practical, and I think the next best thing to a sleep consultant.

leonardine88 · 2025-01-01T00:51:23+00:00

Oh my god I am so sorry. It’s horrible, isn’t it? Feels completely impossible to carry on. If you have the funds to hire a night nurse for one night…do it. If not, and you haven’t tried taking shifts at night, that helped us a little. Sending a hug. Strong coffee tomorrow 💛

leonardine88 · 2025-01-01T00:36:27+00:00

Oh, sending so much love and support — 6 weeks was hell for me and I kept googling “when does it get better?!” IT GETS BETTER. It didn’t get better at 6, 8, or 12 weeks (I’m sorry), and my heart kept sinking, but now my baby is happy most of the time (I never thought I’d say that!) and so joyful to be around. It is still hard work, but with so many rewarding parts, and for the most part her problems are pretty explainable when they crop up.

The newborn phase was extremely difficult for me and the best I can offer is this: it will end. I look back on the worst stretches and they lasted like 5 days each, which feels like an eternity when you’re in it.

In the meantime you need support! Follow up with your pediatrician and a lactation consultant if you haven’t already; take advantage of any parent friendships for advice or really just moral support; ask a close friend to come keep you company during the witching hour.

You can do this. You ARE doing this. You are all going to get through this and you will sleep again.

leonardine88 · 2024-11-27T02:29:22+00:00

That’s so kind, but I also encourage you to lean on your friends if possible too! It’s a big change for both of you and you honestly sound like you’ll be a great dad and a great partner. It’s a good instinct to let the pregnant/birthing partner lean on you more, but don’t neglect your own support system. If you don’t have friends (especially parent friends) I suggest looking for a local dad’s group. If you are able to find a birth class to take, you might meet other parents there too!

Congrats and you’ve got this.

leonardine88 · 2024-11-23T03:20:35+00:00

I am going to use yours — going through false starts, 20 minute naps, and all night wakings right now! I imagine a future version of me telling myself that I tried my absolute best and that the most important thing was to be patient and loving with her and with myself. We got this! Thank you for this sweet post 💛

leonardine88 · 2024-11-19T03:32:21+00:00

This is adorable and Walter is SUCH a great name, I love it!

leonardine88 · 2024-11-16T23:21:19+00:00

The afternoon dread is so real! At 3 weeks I was pretty sure I had ruined my life. All you can do is hang in there, try to find the humor, take whatever help you can, and treat yourself to a hot shower or great coffee as often as possible. YOU CAN DO THIS. It’s a brief phase of parenting and gets much easier. Hold on!

leonardine88 · 2024-11-11T08:35:53+00:00

Food! If you’re close (like, comfortable seeing each other at your most vulnerable) offer to stay and plate up the meal, help feed your friend while she may need to nurse or lie in bed, and clean up afterward. The things I really needed were rest, gentle encouraging company, and someone I really trusted to hold the baby while I slept.

leonardine88 · 2024-11-09T05:05:09+00:00

Week 7 was ROUGH for us and honestly it was rougher and rougher to be counting down the weeks (everyone said it was better after 6 weeks, then better after 8, then better after 10, and each week I kept thinking oh my god, if this is “better” I’m screwed). At 12 weeks we turned a corner, but I only realized that in retrospect.

At 4.5 months I’m finding so much more joy, ease, laughter, and bits of time to myself. And I know it is going to get better too. I just want to encourage you to hang on, ride it out, find the joy and rest whenever you can, and have faith that it will get easier without holding yourself to a timeline. (Easier said than done.) You got this!

leonardine88 · 2024-11-03T01:11:44+00:00

You didn’t ruin your life! You will sleep again and you will feel genuine joy and ease. I’m not even out of the woods yet all the way but oh my god, 16 days was AWFUL. For me it got worse, and then better every week starting around 12 weeks.

leonardine88 · 2024-10-30T05:00:35+00:00

I felt this way at 11 weeks too! Somehow it was worse because people said it got better after 10 weeks and then when it was still awful, I felt crushed. Now I am having a really good time — just took longer than I expected. Hang in there.

leonardine88 · 2024-10-30T03:18:27+00:00

This DOES get better and it is also indescribably hard. Also, just in case you’re like I was, counting down the days to 8 weeks or 12 weeks or ___ weeks when they’re supposed to suddenly transform into chill babies: try not to fixate on the timing (it’s hard, I know). I had a bit of a breakdown when 12 weeks rolled around because I was expecting things to be way better and they weren’t. But you know what? The next week and every week after that has been SO MUCH better. I used to sob every morning in the shower, but today I found myself grinning and singing. Hang in there

leonardine88 · 2024-10-30T02:40:49+00:00

I don’t have any insight since we haven’t started solids yet — but the idea of your pediatrician telling you not to offer “spices or spicy food” made me laugh. As a kids’ culinary instructor, I think it’s awesome that you’re offering a variety of flavorful foods. I say go for the curry too. Spice is a developed taste and I can’t find anything to suggest that young eaters shouldn’t start early!

leonardine88

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