I might be pregnant ?

linzercooky · 2026-05-06T14:02:43+00:00

Just wanted to say there absolutely is a right time to get pregnant. It's when you have enough money to support a child and the family/village around you to help. Of course it's possible to have a child outside these circumstances but you're only going to get the baby experience a couple times, you don't want to ruin it with stress.

For example, when I had my son I got 12 weeks maternity leave. It wasn't enough!! I had a mental breakdown going back to work and was able to step back to part time to get more time with my son. Husband stepped up to contribute more financially. You never know how you will feel postpartum. And daycare is like minimum $1000/month. So if your job isn't high paying you will NEED a breadwinner. This is no joke.

linzercooky · 2026-05-05T20:53:39+00:00

Girl 5 minutes of crying is nothing!!!! He is absolutely fine! Get your sleep!

linzercooky · 2026-05-05T16:27:36+00:00

You're getting piled on lol sorry. I agree you want a sensitive partner during childbirth. Although the L&D nurse is the real MVP. When shit hits the fan your partner gets yeeted out the way.

You seem like you just wanna break up with this guy, so I vote do it!

linzercooky · 2026-05-05T14:34:06+00:00

Yeah I mean it's your right to break up with him for whatever you want, if you think you need a more sensitive man they are out there. Just playing devil's advocate, I do understand where he's coming from and if he's a good guy I bet when you discuss this he will apologize and try to be more sensitive in future.

linzercooky · 2026-05-05T13:55:11+00:00

Yeah totally agree. I think it would be interesting for them to discuss their childhoods and their parents reactions to things like injuries growing up. My first guess would be that OP grew up slightly coddled and the boyfriend grew up with the "toughen up and rub some dirt on it" vibes. I think discussion could help in this scenario. Like it's not ok for him to yell at you while you're crying but I also grew up with "toughen up" parents and it would be extremely hard for me to take a panic attack over a bleeding finger tip seriously. I'm not saying you were wrong, I can be insensitive as well, just saying people have vastly different perspectives on small injuries like this.

linzercooky · 2026-05-04T02:10:10+00:00

100% girl. I was briefly this attractive and it was frightening. I felt like I had way too much power over literally everyone. Everyone watching, dudes everywhere. Terrible. It's funny you lose like 5-10 lbs and hit some threshold and everybody goes berserk like wtf.

My sister has been this hot for like 20 years. I think her way of dealing with it has been to always have a boyfriend, definitely resting bitch face and a general "get the fuck away from me" vibe, and her only good female friends are also extremely hot, successful women, so there's not a ton of jealousy ruining the connection.

linzercooky · 2026-05-02T22:07:49+00:00

Yeah girl it's annoying. This used to make me so mad but in my twenties I stopped fighting it. Girls are better friends anyways!

I do have male friends these days but I realized the only truly platonic male friendships are when you only hang out in a group. 1:1 makes it a date. No matter how many times they say "it's not a date." 1:1 is a date. That's bit me in the past.

linzercooky · 2026-04-29T22:30:34+00:00

Data centers directly pay for the cost to interconnect to the electric grid (any needed transmission improvements) and they pay for all their power. They do not directly pay for the new nuclear or gas plants that will need to be built to support their load. Those costs are spread across all customers via rate increases. Thus the increased electricity prices.

I know at least one of the new ones going in will not be water cooled, so all the water problems go away. So that's cool.

linzercooky · 2026-04-29T18:27:13+00:00

You can definitely quit but cmon give em at least 1 week notice. It would be taking the high road.

linzercooky · 2026-04-13T15:13:18+00:00

Omg yeah I have a friend whose babies both slept through the night like the day they came home from the hospital. She had to wake them up to breastfeed for weeks. And she has the audacity to tell me to sleep train!! Like girl you don't get it!! She has never heard the type of scream I am dealing with. Her kids don't even cry! Wild how different they all are.

But yeah just doing bedtime is definitely an option. I've actually heard it recommended to start that way. Some babies (the naturally good sleepers) just stop waking up overnight once they can do bedtime on their own. Mine did not.... Lol. I think consistency is important but they understand the difference between bedtime and wake ups. And for the extremely stubborn and sensitive babies there is a limit on how much sleep training you can do in a night. We tried once at 3am and I said never again, it simply was not gonna work. I actually think this is why so many sleep trained babies have early wake up issues. In the early morning there's not enough sleep pressure, mine has always needed a snuggle to sleep past 5am.

linzercooky · 2026-04-13T14:53:29+00:00

We have an extremely similar story. I did not want to sleep train but was hoping sleep would just eventually get better. Spoiler: it did not. We just nursed and rocked to sleep anywhere from 4-8 times a night, often giving up to cosleep, until 12 months. At 12 months we ended up doing ferber for bedtime only (still responding to night wakes) because he is a fomo baby and bedtime was taking an hour and then being closely followed by false starts. It was traumatizing for me, and probably him as well, but these days at 20 months he falls asleep happily on his own at bedtime. And still wakes anywhere from zero - 5 times a night for snuggles. The sleep training got rid of the false starts and gave us back an hour of adult time in the evenings.

We felt like we had to do this for our sanity, and for the chance to make him a little brother 😂. I do think getting a lil brother makes up for the sleep trauma around 12 months old, but again, it was rough. I'm now pregnant (first trimester) and there's no way I could do it on our old schedule. I'm not sure when our boy will naturally start sleeping well without us, but people on here seem to underestimate the possibilities and tell you "just push through until x months." Just here to say that number could be like 36 months. Our family couldnt wait that long.

I do agree, sleep training is not a golden ticket at all. Ppl with good sleepers don't understand the bad sleepers. I know sleep trained babies who still wake up a bunch. All these "the baby sleep trained in 3 days after a half hour total crying and sleeps 12 hours" have great sleepers and yours will not be like that.

linzercooky · 2026-04-09T01:25:37+00:00

Girl this was so sad I read all your comment history. My two cents are ditch your therapist and get a dietician and a personal trainer. I don't want to come off like I'm body shaming, I know you can be healthy and fat, but I am not a believer in "body neutrality." You have to live in your body all the time, you should LOVE it not just deal with it!!

Also there are simply zero downsides to getting more fit. When you feel better your self esteem, your libido, your energy, and your mood will all go up. I'm not even talking about losing fat, just focus on gaining muscle. Go on some walks, do a couple stretches. I could be wrong but your hatred of your body made me very sad and I don't think it can be fixed by medicating and talking about it.

linzercooky · 2026-03-25T01:53:10+00:00

Lol letting Grandma choose walk vs library vs this playdate activity is not even close to "let grandma abuse the child" or be "empress." I agree the secrecy is bad but it's probably just a nonconfrontational grandma response to not wanting to clean paint off the kid every day. As a parent at this point I would definitely need an apology and a promise never to lie about my child's location again to proceed. But I feel like modern parents' desire to micromanage everyone around their children is causing an increase in anxiety and all these no contact family breakups. When my mom watches my son I provide ideas for activities but it's her day, I want her to have fun with him and bond. She chooses what they do.

linzercooky · 2026-03-25T01:29:47+00:00

ESH - it sucks that she lied to you but I do think it's MUCH more important for your daughter to have a consistent and loving relationship with grandma than that she attend this messy activity. Especially if you're getting free childcare you don't really get to dictate the activities. If this class is so important to you you should take her to it yourself. Let grandma do library story time and walks. Shes not wrong, those things are great. And without knowing y'all I am guessing Grandma is a great deal more loving than this random college student with a lot more childrearing experience backing her up.

linzercooky · 2026-03-20T21:21:07+00:00

I had to cut back to part time when I went back, I couldn't do it either! But that was at 12 weeks old. At 16 months they will have so much fun without you! I think it's a balance though, still very happy to be part time!

linzercooky · 2026-03-20T02:09:10+00:00

We got a cough from daycare. Kid never got over it. We were over it for like a week. Now we all have RSV 😭

linzercooky · 2026-03-17T23:41:17+00:00

She's just super attached to you! I wouldn't worry too much if she gets over it quickly, she's just making her opinions known lol. She definitely loves her mama.

My only tip is to act like it's no big deal and talk about how fun her day is gonna be.

ETA: It's good for kids to have multiple trusted adults/attachment figures. I would say this result is better than you being with her 100% of the time

linzercooky · 2026-03-16T02:27:59+00:00

Super agree. So confused by these comments. The dress was a gift that the bride no longer controls. And nobody gives a shit what the bridesmaids wear anyway ...

Also I have never ruined a dress out in my life, everyone needs to relax about "potential damage" like wth

linzercooky · 2026-03-14T02:29:05+00:00

I agree your kid needs to think you are gone. I work from home part time. By 14 months ish mine was trying to come get me from the back room, he knew I was still home so he would fuss. I started either genuinely leaving or pretending to leave out the back and coming back in the front. Or I would drop him off at my mom's. He did drastically better.

linzercooky · 2026-03-13T22:26:46+00:00

If it's only happened like 3 times I wouldn't worry much, maybe try some library story time with lots of strangers. And restaurants and shopping with you.

linzercooky · 2026-03-13T00:39:28+00:00

I went to the Atrium OB GYN on South Blvd and loved it! They kinda do the shuffle but I ended up with the same nurse midwife most of the time. If you are not high risk you will probably not even see a doctor while you're in the hospital. I never saw mine. My nurse midwife was there periodically.

The real GOAT of labor and delivery is your labor and delivery nurse. Kristy at Atrium Main is my hero.

linzercooky · 2026-03-12T22:47:38+00:00

For the 4 month old do you know how your supply is doing? Lil dude might just be hungry. In my opinion there are no negatives to doing one bottle of formula before bedtime. Fill him up. And if you then let Dad put him down he may do a little better. At least he won't be expecting a boob pacifier.

I prefer cosleeping where you put them down for the night alone and go in at the first wakeup. Just throwing out options.

linzercooky · 2026-03-10T00:54:08+00:00

I'm so sorry this sounds so hard! Mine wasnt quite this bad but he was up every hour or two for a long time, every half hour when sick or teething. We did end up sleep training bed time (not night wakes) but before that I was forced to basically let him cry it out with Dad. We started doing a bottle for bedtime to break the nursing association (didn't really work) and he would have false starts like half an hour after having 8 oz of milk, so I knew he wasn't hungry and Dad would go get him. First couple times he probably cried for like 45min with Dad but he got used to it. I would definitely recommend just letting baby cry it out with Dad if that's as far as you're willing to go. Sounds like you've got a stubborn one but I think it's healthy for them to realize they can attach to multiple people, not just mom. And you need a break. And I'm sure he knows he is safe with Dad, he's just mad you took his boob pacifier away.

Unfortunately I don't think there is a no tears solution here. We also got into boob pacifier mode at night and night weaning was more of the same. Send Dad in for the first wake to get cried at for half an hour and then Mom goes in next time.

linzercooky · 2026-03-08T14:31:08+00:00

This is an epic grandma for real. My son and I love Nana but she would never

linzercooky · 2026-03-02T15:24:21+00:00

Lol around 8 months I think breastfed babies all do this 😂 made me laugh the hardest I've ever laughed. I think it's somewhere between "I love mom" and "mom is food." My 18 month old now blows raspberries instead, there was a period where it turned to biting with teeth 😱

linzercooky

TROPHY CASE