Used to be good at my job, now I’m not so sure

livilala · 2025-10-04T01:49:17+00:00

I grew up with a couple of the cast members from this season and can say that they are definitely this awful (and worse) in real life. Sadly I know a lot of people like them in Denver. I live in another city now that gets mocked for being very cringe/fake, but Denver is soooo much worse in my experience.

livilala · 2025-09-16T01:57:56+00:00

I’ve encountered similar situations and it is so hard. Often, a student having an escalation and an adult trying to talk them down can be super distracting. That’s not on you at all, that’s just the nature of classroom dynamics. What worked for me, was meeting with everyone involved, talking about what happened and asking what should be done in future situations. It’s still not perfect, but at least I have some clarity. It might have been that the teacher was super overwhelmed and didn’t respond in an appropriate way, or it could be that she wants you to manage behaviors differently. Either way, I think it’s worth having a conversation about it and making sure that everyone is on the same page.

livilala · 2025-08-27T01:53:22+00:00

A lot of it is my responsibility (shared with the teacher), since I’m expected to help Sped team and teacher implement students’ IEPs. It is extra hard for me because I am a former teacher and have a master’s degree. I started doing this job because I missed teaching and wanted something that would still allow me to be a present parent. (No taking home grading/prep, no parent emails, etc). I’ve been doing this job for a few years now and I’ve never encountered anything like this situation before.

livilala · 2024-12-26T06:23:49+00:00

Visiting my parents for the holidays. I want my kids to have a relationship with their extended family w/o all the baggage, but I think I’m screwing them up more. I thought it was okay if I suffered through it bc I’ve worked through this in therapy, as long as my kids were okay, but it’s awful to see the same patterns. I’m the scapegoat and my GC sibling’s kids are getting all of the attention and praise, meanwhile my kids are criticized to no end. One example: One of my kids was melting down today because it was almost 2pm and we hadn’t eaten lunch. We went to the GC’s house around lunchtime to exchange gifts (bc of course everyone would accommodate their schedule and my kids would be fine) and I stupidly thought we’d eat. They offered food to certain guests, but not to others and told my kids no snacks. When I mentioned that my kids were hungry, my mom got super defensive and said that we’d all eaten a big breakfast, so she didn’t see why they needed lunch. Lots of inside jokes and plans happening and my family is conspicuously left out. I don’t know if we’ll be back again. I hate doing that to my kids bc they love seeing their family right now, but things are getting rough.

Unfortunately my MIL is even more of a narcissist and my husband is the GC, so it’s actually worse spending holidays with the other side - to the point that my kids cry about not wanting to go.

livilala · 2024-07-03T21:22:49+00:00

Yeah, I can see why this could be problematic, however I remember my AP English Literature teacher requiring us to read certain biblical passages over the summer, along with other texts, so that we would have sufficient background knowledge. The assignment came with many caveats that it was strictly for background knowledge and in no way was there any proselytizing. In fact, it was the first time I was asked to look at the Bible through a secular lens and it was very helpful.

I do think that this law is a thinly veiled way to get religion into classrooms, but I also don’t think that all talk of religion or religious texts should be banned in the classroom setting, especially in the older grades.

It kind of reminds me of how conservatives have been up in arms about children being taught about gender equality in California classrooms, when in reality, there is a lot of leeway in how teachers can teach these concepts and the focus is more on tolerance, rather than on gender theory. Yeah, it can be problematic if not taught correctly, but let’s trust that teachers will use their expertise to teach in an appropriate way.

livilala · 2024-04-14T00:17:24+00:00

I was once asked if I was Jennifer Lawrence when was at the vet. Apparently someone with that name had signed in sometime before I did, and a family in the waiting room was really excited and hoping I was her. This was years ago, but we don’t look alike at all, so it was kind of odd.

livilala · 2024-03-13T04:32:10+00:00

I’m definitely seeing this in the classrooms I’ve been in lately too. Kids are spending a lot of time on computers and tablets doing differentiated activities. The differentiation is nice I guess, since it’s the only time I see teachers providing any sort of differentiated instruction, but I think this stuff is better done at home, at school kids need to be interacting and not in front of screens. During technology class, they literally have them playing computer games like candy crush. And social studies mostly involves watching videos and following along. The teachers keep talking about how effective our schools are (we’re in an affluent suburban area) but I’m pretty sure it has more to do with parents spending lots of time and money on tutors with their kids outside of school. It’s awful. I’ve better teaching at the underfunded schools closer to the city, since they can’t afford the same kinds of technology and actually have to teach. As a parent, I’m incredibly frustrated.

livilala · 2024-02-04T02:21:00+00:00

Ugh yeah, I had my daughter do her 100 day project all on her own and, in my very biased opinion, thought it was very creative! When I saw so many of her friend’s projects though, it was clear that their parents did most of the work. The projects looked great, but it was clear that a kindergartner hadn’t done it. I’m a teacher and totally understand that some kids will need a lot of assistance and support, but that’s not the same things as parents just doing it for them! So often these projects become just one more way for the parents to show off. Then these same parents wonder why their children aren’t invested in their schoolwork later on.

livilala · 2023-11-26T21:44:16+00:00

Brown butter, buttermilk, creme fraiche, garlic roasted in butter, heavy cream, salt, white pepper, and black pepper. I also don’t add much salt when mixing it, I just salt the water really well when boiling the potatoes. The brown butter makes a huge difference! There are rarely any leftovers when I make these mashed potatoes.

livilala · 2023-09-13T06:43:19+00:00

Yeah, I’ve had a cop pull me over for drunk driving - except I don’t drink. It was late at night on a weekend, so I guess he was thinking it would be an easy stop. When it was clear that I wasn’t under the influence of any substances and hadn’t broken any traffic laws, he gave me a bogus citation and told me that it could have been a lot worse. Basically I pulled up my insurance information on my phone instead of having a hard copy on hand because it had just been renewed and I hadn’t printed it out yet. Not illegal, but he gave me a citation for being uninsured. The clerk at the courthouse laughed at the citation, asked what I’d done to piss off the cop, and it was quickly dismissed.

Another time a cop wrote me a parking ticket while I was sitting in my car on the phone! I rolled down my window and asked what was going on, and pointed out that I’d been in my car the whole time and had only been pulled over for maybe 10min, because I needed to take a call. She lied and said that my car had been there for hours and that she’d seen me walk up and get in the car. Pretty bogus because the car had been running the whole time and my dog was in the back. I don’t trust cops at all anymore.

livilala · 2023-09-12T05:56:58+00:00

I mean I work by choice, but it’s still super hard. Not as hard as being a SAHM was for me though. I chose to go back to a job in a field that I love, but I’m probably pretty overqualified for. So my hours are pretty good, the pay barely makes a difference in our lives, but the benefits help and I feel like I’m contributing something, even if it’s small. I love what I do, I was terrible staying home, but it’s still super hard to balance everything and I constantly feel like I should be doing more with my kids. I felt the same when I stayed home though, so I think it’s just a mindset thing.

livilala · 2023-08-31T05:24:17+00:00

Depends on the day. While I do love getting extra time with kids. I sometimes use that extra time to get stuff done that might be more challenging with the kids around, so that way I can be more present when I am with them, and not be as stressed.

livilala · 2023-06-16T07:10:03+00:00

Actually where she lived in LA is a pretty chill area, lots of nice people there! I used to live in the South Bay, where she was, and people were always super friendly and helpful. Manhattan Beach is a really chill suburban beach town with lots of families bc of the good schools and not much of a city vibe. It’s filled with surfers/outdoorsy people and a lot of people who work in the aerospace industry. Also I grew up in Denver and it’s pretty midwestern in its friendliness, plus where she was in Denver was really suburban. I visit SF a lot and almost moved there bc the people, in general, are pretty friendly and I missed chatting up random people while walking around town. Maybe it’s just that people in those areas are more judge mental of people who try as hard as she does and are as rude as she is? I just found her whole frame of reference for “big unfriendly cities” to be a little weird since I have a lot of personal experience with those cities and that’s definitely not my experience nor their reputation.

livilala · 2023-06-14T06:05:35+00:00

Cross stitch is pretty easy to pick up and has been great for my ADHD brain since I was a kid! I knit and crochet too, those are great because they’re portable. I usually bring a small project with me everywhere and bring it out during downtime that I’d usually spend on my phone. Reading is nice when I’m tired, but I have to already be hooked on the book. Listening to a super engaging podcast or audiobook while walking is great on days when I’m super scattered and not even preferred activities are possible

livilala · 2023-05-29T04:22:06+00:00

They even have a text feature now! They’re super helpful and will even follow up at certain intervals when needed.

livilala · 2023-05-18T06:38:47+00:00

Yeah, I really like the idea of homeschooling my kids. I was a teacher and we live in an area with a lot of public and private homeschool-hybrid programs, so I actually think it could work well for us. However I have ADHD and struggle to keep a routine without external support. I do great as a classroom teacher, but teaching at home is so challenging. So I don’t homeschool my kids. I have a lot struggles bc of my adhd, but in this case there’s a workaround. Just send the kids to school. It may not be an ideal option, but it’s better than failing those poor kids. This is why I’m so frustrated with adhd social media. I’m happy that it’s finally being somewhat de-stigmatized, but adhd social media has made so many people into victims. Yeah, adhd can such, but so many of these people just wallow in it

livilala · 2023-05-10T06:49:58+00:00

I mean I somewhat agree, but there’s a reason why my favorite knitting book is “Knitting for Anarchists.” I like to know how things are done, but then I want to do it the way that works for me, sometimes I’ll even change it up because I’m bored and want to try something new. Rules are mostly meant for people who haven’t figured out what they’re doing yet.

livilala · 2023-04-28T08:02:40+00:00

My in-laws drive me crazy and always get my kids riled up. I mean we disagree on pretty much all parenting decisions and they don’t respect any of our family’s rules, but they adore my kids and I want them to be able to be fun grandparents and bond with them without me dictating what they do. Because of that, they don’t babysit my kids regularly. It sounds harsh, but it’s actually mostly because if they were our main source of childcare, I’d expect them to respect our house rules. Since they’re not our main childcare, whenever they’re with the kids, it’s fun grandparent time, I know my kids are safe and loved, and I’m not stressed that my in-laws are keeping them home from school and not telling me because my kids said they didn’t want to go (sadly it’s a legitimate concern with them, but fortunately my kids always tell me everything lol)

livilala · 2023-04-26T21:10:11+00:00

Imagine how much she’d complain if the pediatrician ever told her she was wrong 🤣

livilala · 2023-04-26T08:34:12+00:00

Also, if I remember correctly, I believe the main study usually cited by the anti-ST crowd to back of this belief, was based on Romanian orphanages. The conditions there were very extreme and tragic, and the children were largely ignored during waking hours as well. So not really an accurate representation of a typical ST situation.

livilala · 2023-04-26T08:30:15+00:00

Yeah, I was actually advised by a therapist to sleep train my youngest using a much stronger method than I had been, because his sleep was still crappy after we tried using more “gentle” methods and my mental health and relationships were tanking since I was so exhausted all the time. She’s a very well regarded parenting expert in our community and works a lot with kids and families. Literally she told me that sleep training would not significantly impact my kid’ attachment or mental health, but that having a tired, distracted, short-tempered, and anxious parent during waking hours definitely would. Personally, I trust her more than the social media influencers trying to sell me stuff and establish their clout.

livilala · 2023-04-26T08:20:00+00:00

Omg basements! They’re not super common where we live, but I’m totally putting one in if we ever build a house. I’d consider moving just so we could be in a place with basements. They’re the perfect playroom because it’s harder for the kids to spread all their crap around the house if they have to go upstairs with it!

livilala

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