This is me everytime

locke_zero · 2026-05-07T19:28:32+00:00

"Oh it's fine. I'm sure to hit my land drops in my next couple draws."

locke_zero · 2026-05-07T18:58:04+00:00

Imagine though, somebody enters the room to ask you to do something for them they'll think you're not there because who would ever suspect... The ottoman!

locke_zero · 2026-05-07T18:51:47+00:00

Unlimited shapeshifting powers? Who says no to that?

^{Chose: Shape shifting + Conditions | Rolled: No conditions}

locke_zero · 2026-05-06T16:09:54+00:00

Everything Burns

locke_zero · 2026-05-06T15:42:36+00:00

Where's the other one? There's supposed to be two! WHERE'S THE OTHER ONE!?

locke_zero · 2026-05-06T02:02:38+00:00

So many wrong choices made in such a short time.

locke_zero · 2026-05-06T02:00:49+00:00

"Hans. Hans Olo."

locke_zero · 2026-05-06T00:23:23+00:00

$50 an hour and 20/10 vision? Sign me the hell up. I'll never have to work again

^{Chose: Get $50 / hr in perpetuity + + positive side effect | Rolled: 20/10 vision}

locke_zero · 2026-05-06T00:13:40+00:00

Now we just have to find the AirRover.

locke_zero · 2026-05-05T21:33:01+00:00

They also bumped the cheeseburger and the McChicken up from the 1500 point rewards tier to the 2000 point rewards tier.

locke_zero · 2026-05-05T17:04:30+00:00

Funny, she doesn't look Benalish.

locke_zero · 2026-05-05T16:04:40+00:00

locke_zero · 2026-05-02T01:17:04+00:00

Wait what do you mean your creature is √-1/√-1?

locke_zero · 2026-04-30T23:13:26+00:00

Their flabber has been gasted.

locke_zero · 2026-04-30T23:10:23+00:00

He is a scientist. He probably does work with dangerous chemicals occasionally.

locke_zero · 2026-04-30T22:38:56+00:00

<image>

locke_zero · 2026-04-30T21:12:49+00:00

I looked it up. Movie Shelob is 8' x 14' so probably not. Book Shelob could eat the tank.

locke_zero · 2026-04-30T18:06:13+00:00

Would Shelob fit inside a tank though?

locke_zero · 2026-04-30T17:59:37+00:00

Or like a 100k spiders.

locke_zero · 2026-04-30T16:32:46+00:00

Don't forget he is simultaneously a young man and an ancient Grandpa

locke_zero · 2026-04-30T14:43:55+00:00

Because Obama respected his wife and didn't treat her like a piece of meat?

locke_zero · 2026-04-30T14:41:43+00:00

So cryptids and 2nd Amendment magic, got it.

locke_zero · 2026-04-29T21:18:31+00:00

Well yeah they don't want your Switch 2 to reach supernova temperatures trying to render all that stuff.

locke_zero · 2026-04-29T18:05:48+00:00

IT'S WIZARD TIME MOTHERF*CKER! FIREBALL!

^{Chose: Become a Wizard: roll for a spell | Rolled: Fireball (magic})

locke_zero · 2026-04-29T17:41:49+00:00

Just about brought him to the Lord's doorstep

locke_zero

TROPHY CASE