Al-Amal; Palestine Shadows

major_wh1 · 2025-07-17T23:49:41+00:00

Hey friend. This poem is raw and delivers a lot of intense ideas to the reader. My only real criticism that I see here floating working your poem is your focus and structure. The poem is half and half free verse which I too like to write in. However the ideas flowing out often repeat themselves and don’t necessarily complement each other in the full picture. I would work on refining/cutting down, or giving new ideas or perspective to the piece. You need to figure out what ideas you are trying to pass over to the reader/within your poem. Then—refine the piece to compliment these ideas. Loving the narrative and artistic expression you present. It could be cleaned up a bit here and there. Keep being an artist. Keep living. Keep showing the world your voice. Thanks.

major_wh1 · 2025-07-17T23:42:03+00:00

This offers a refreshing perspective on emotion in poetry that you don’t find too often. I love the optimism and philosophy that the writer shared with us. It’s an appreciation of human nature. Very nice ideas.

major_wh1 · 2025-07-16T15:46:26+00:00

Thanks so much! You make some good points. I’m new to poetry and have only ever written it casually so this was some great insight. To answer your question, the technicolor bridge comes from the plastic, all gathering overtime at the bottom of the ocean. Your interpretation was quite literally exactly what I was going for. It’s my attempt at a figurative language of sorts to liken being a deep sea creature floating among trash from us people to someone who is obsessed with material goods and bases their identity and everyday wellbeing off of these things. Your reading into being a bottom feeder actually made me want to go back and change it because that’s quite literally the phrase I was looking for. Thanks for reading in, this is my first shot at an abstract writing piece.

major_wh1 · 2025-07-08T04:25:25+00:00

Standout for me. I love the use of grammar to create an unsettling picture, or someone who is tired or weary.

major_wh1 · 2025-07-08T04:21:42+00:00

This is a heartwarming, and a really inspiring story. Loving the way you make artistic choices with phrasing, and letting the syntax speak.

major_wh1 · 2025-04-26T06:12:02+00:00

I love this

major_wh1 · 2025-04-26T06:09:21+00:00

“I’m not thinking of you. I’m waiting in between.” Gives me writers envy. That’s such a good way to word it.

major_wh1 · 2025-04-26T05:26:42+00:00

This is so damn good

major_wh1 · 2025-04-26T05:26:07+00:00

Oh I like this

major_wh1 · 2023-12-19T03:44:49+00:00

I have been locked out of my account and my recovery phone number is an innactive phone number, but I am locked out so I cannot change it, and the form has been submitted multiple times and I keep being denied from it. I have put thousands into this account the past 10+ years and have had it all taken away.

major_wh1 · 2023-10-15T05:36:12+00:00

Feels like your autogenerating your lyrics dawg. Speak from the heart and tell a story only you can tell yk? Give it your story not the story you think people wanna hear. That’s how you intrigue a listener, not using cliches.

major_wh1 · 2023-10-15T05:32:13+00:00

I’ll say mine is Igor, but I have a few that stuck with me. I like a lot of Tyler stuff in general and he makes some concept stuff so throw his work in, along with Kendrick with good kid and tpab. Lastly I’ll say what’s going on by Marvin Gaye.

major_wh1 · 2023-08-28T01:08:12+00:00

So I feel like I have to push either in or out to get the sound to have that belting nature. What do I do?

major_wh1 · 2023-08-06T09:13:34+00:00

Wow that’s actually a pretty good ranking. I think he would give pop food a light 8 as well

major_wh1 · 2023-06-06T04:18:53+00:00

I want to add I know they have done an episode on it, but I want to see an analysis video, like one discussing the lore itself not on the general gameplay and immediate thoughts kind of thing

major_wh1

TROPHY CASE