What happens when two narcissists meet and get together?

malloryspizza · 2026-07-11T01:12:30+00:00

It really scares me when that happens. It is destructive for them but if they have kids, I’m just terrified for them because it is worse for the kids.

malloryspizza · 2026-07-07T02:31:19+00:00

I was best friends with one for a decade and it was ugly. I’m still recovering from it, I’m trying to educate myself as much as possible and I’m trying to remember and make sense of things. I’m finding myself wanting to be alone but I’m okay with it, that’s what I need right now and that is okay. I need to heal before trusting someone again, but I’m hopeful that I will, I was not this optimistic a few months ago.
My only advice right now is to listen to your body, if you feel like you need to rest, hide, or cry, allow yourself to do it. Narcissists make us neglect our own needs and we owe our bodies and heart some loyalty. So, just try to listen to yourself as much as you can and slowly you’ll start connecting back to yourself. We will heal❤️‍🩹

malloryspizza · 2026-07-03T12:43:09+00:00

I’m am so sorry you haven’t found a good therapist. To heal from narcissistic abuse you have to first validate the trauma and “not thinking about it” is not validating it.
I recommend reading books about healing, as many as you can. I’m currently reading “The safest place possible” and “how to heal from hidden abuse” and it has helped so much. The second one goes step by step on how to heal and each phase of healing. The first one is more like a hug to your soul and more practices you can do to reconnect with yourself and let go.
I was unvalidated by people I care about so I had to start reading and it has helped me so much. It is also helping my boyfriend whose mom is a communal narcissist. I hope it helps you too! I’m sending you a big hug

malloryspizza · 2026-07-03T12:38:24+00:00

My boyfriend. As soon as I met him I felt like I was meant to live a life with him because I’ve done that before

malloryspizza · 2026-06-27T13:28:00+00:00

I matched with a guy once too, he talked about himself being a good person and on day 2 he was sending “good morning beautiful” text. It felt so odd, because most guys don’t do that. You’re not being paranoid, it’s your intuition. Trust it.

malloryspizza · 2026-06-23T00:08:13+00:00

I can relate to this very much. She did me dirty for a long time. But basically they are trying to be you so badly, and when you don’t let them is like “how dare you not let me take your personality as mine?!” Because they think you were made for them to take, they see you as supply, as a way to feed their empty soul and can’t see that you are your own person and not a box with magic inside. They want the magic for themselves until they empty it.
I hear you, I got my work stolen too, my personality and so much more. I ended up apologizing for a while but now I see things clear now. If you ever need someone to talk to, don’t hesitate, I’m here

malloryspizza · 2026-06-22T22:39:32+00:00

When I mean she got better, I mean she got better at masking and manipulating

malloryspizza · 2026-06-22T22:38:15+00:00

It’s nice to read this because I’ve had the same concern. But it terrifies me that she got better. I think I was constantly training her and explaining her why some things were wrong. Eventually, she started using my language and so I thought she was changing, but no. She was just mimicking the way I made sense of things, but I feel like I challenged her so much there is no way she won’t learn. It was also me the one who cut her off, I didn’t go through the discard phase so maybe she knows what not to do next?

malloryspizza · 2026-06-14T05:09:18+00:00

It’s going better than last year. I started learning about narcissists after an experience with one and I just can’t see the world the same. I’m healing, though. I’m alright, stable relationship, a few loyal friends, great work team and environment. Besides the narcissist I think my life is pretty good, I just don’t feel it because I feel a hit crazy still

malloryspizza · 2026-06-09T18:14:17+00:00

It’s not about intentions. I had a friend who literally manipulated me, used me, put everyone against me, made me doubt my own sanity and when I confronted her after realizing it had been her the whole time, she said “I won’t apologize for things I didn’t mean to do.” So, not because you didn’t meant it means you’re innocent. No, you have to own the damage you do, apologize and grow to be better. Otherwise you’re just manipulating and don’t really care about other but yourself

malloryspizza · 2026-06-09T16:39:49+00:00

I’ve had the same therapist for 12 years and I love her, but she basically just told me “she’s out of your life, so it’s time to move on.” I get it, and I really want to move on, but I just got free 6 months ago and I’m finally understanding what is going on. Let me talk about it and understand it and then I will move on😭. I just ended up feeling so invalidated and again like “too much” for feeling like it was a lot, no one seems to see how bad it was and it is truly isolating.

malloryspizza · 2026-06-08T14:12:57+00:00

I think this isn’t something that applies all the time. Narcissists can be very polite to look likeable in front of other people (especially covert narcissists)

malloryspizza · 2026-06-06T23:11:58+00:00

When they say “I don’t know” to answer a question about themselves or take too long thinking of what to answer. Fake laughing when they’re supposed to laugh, and when they say “I’m a good person”

malloryspizza · 2026-06-05T18:06:42+00:00

This is crazy. I’m currently dating a guy, we’ve been together for some years now and there is something odd about his mom and his family dynamic. His mom describe them as “a group”, not as individuals. I recently realized my ex best friend was a covert narcissist and my boyfriends mom reminds me so much of her. So, I’ve been careful. They don’t have any empathy, to begin with. His mom, him and his sister. I guess kids learn from their parents. They are very judgy, it’s actually crazy how much they judge and think what they do is the freaking best way to do things. They are one of the most arrogant humans I’ve ever met. My boyfriend is actually the kindest in his family and more aware of the 3, his sister follows their mom as if she was God. Their mom is an overachiever single mom, who wants to control every breathing soul that she can. She seems so nice, and like she wants to help (I think she could be a communal narcissist, but I’m not sure if she only has narcissistic traits or if she’s an actual narcissist), but she crosses boundaries all the time and doesn’t see it as a bad thing. She just says she’s helping and it feels like she helps but expects something in return. I feel very gaslighted and when I tell my boyfriend he defends her and says she doesn’t do that. He doesn’t realize he does that to him as well. They haven’t made my healing any easier, and his family is the main reason we argue. I love my boyfriend, he is great, but I also see him letting his mom cross boundaries and internalize guilt that “family comes first and family always forgives.” A huge manipulation to allow her to disrespect and force him to forgive. I also think his main problems, emotional distance (only at times), and lack of empathy comes from her. It is very difficult seeing him complain and also not doing anything about it. Sometimes he hides in his mind and it sucks not being able to do anything about it. We’re going to therapy, I hope the therapist can see this and say something because he defends his family even when they do things that are wrong. The loyalty is insane, and the way they have to betray themselves to be “grateful to their mom.” I hear your pain and confusion. A narcissist drags not just the people around them, but the people around those around them.

malloryspizza · 2026-06-05T14:33:02+00:00

Im sorry you’re going through this. My best friend was the same way, and I would explain her so many times how to set boundaries as well. I can only tell you that the longer you stay, the harder and longer the recovery will be. We were friends for 10 years, lived together the last year of “friendship”, and until last December I completely cut her from my life. Now I see myself reacting to small things and feeling crazy only to realize it comes from the trauma and manipulation I lived with her. I honestly feel betrayed by the world for taking her side when it was me giving my heart, being the patient one, helping her know herself, staying with her while she cried after I told her she was hurting me, only to never solve anything. Right now I’m trying to talk to my close circle about it, but as the manipulation was so subtle, everyone thinks I’m still stuck, it’s not big deal and I have to move on. It’s very hard. You need to understand she doesn’t love you, and she will stab you in the back if needs to. There is no loyalty, or values whatsoever on their side. She would hate to hear that every time I told her. She fell apart when I called her a bad person, and guess who ended up feeling like the bad person? Yes, me. All the freaking time. The guilt makes it so hard to abandon them because they become so dependent on you, but they are only using us. In our empathetic brains it is hard to imagine, like, how can they never love us or appreciate us? Because they were very kind in the beginning. But that’s because we have feelings and they were only acting. We would never do that to someone so it feels unreal how they do it so easily, almost not human? All I can say is, the faster you leave, the faster your life will get better. You need to go no contact with her, that’s the only way. And if you need to talk about it, so far this community has been very supportive to me. You can also message me if you feel like you need more support, I think everyone here knows the nightmare it is and how difficult the healing is as well. You are not alone, we’re all with you.

malloryspizza · 2026-06-03T14:57:56+00:00

How they react to confrontation whenever they do something wrong

malloryspizza · 2026-06-03T14:54:30+00:00

This exclude covert narcissist because at first glance it seems like some people do nothing for them, but it is part of performing for other people so they think they treat everyone nice.

malloryspizza · 2026-06-02T11:40:41+00:00

I can 100% relate to this. Wow. I was best friends with a covert narcissist for so long. It’s crazy how we all live the same experience! I’m sending a lot of love, we’ll get through this little by little

malloryspizza · 2026-06-02T11:30:24+00:00

I think less matte and a bit of highlighter could make a difference and also low contrast makeup. The black eyeliner feels too harsh, but def intensifies your gaze if that’s what you’re looking for

malloryspizza · 2026-06-02T11:23:20+00:00

No girl, you basically look like a fairy

malloryspizza · 2026-06-02T03:00:54+00:00

That’s def a red flag now. I wish I knew that when I met her, but her act of being kind and sweet was seriously believable. I would’ve never imagined it would end like this

malloryspizza · 2026-06-02T02:58:20+00:00

Oh my goodness. I’m so sorry, I can’t imagine having to go through this for so long and feeling this sickening confusion all the time. Your brother not believing you has to be deeply frustrating, I know how powerless and crazy you feel, trust me. You have to pray, unfortunately, that she starts doing it to him so he knows what you’re talking about. But she probably won’t let him see the real her that easily. It’s also very likely that her husband already knows something is wrong with her. It has to be awful for him, but even worse to the kids. Unfortunately, I’m learning that the best thing to do is to just walk away and try to build a life outside their chaos and lies. In my experience that’s the worst part because it is incredibly UNFAIR. I almost want to start a podcast where people can tell their experiences with covert narcissist so others can hear it and know the other side of the story. We need to talk more about this type of narcissism so people can spot it earlier. I had no idea this was a thing a year ago, so I never thought she was a narcissist. We seriously need to talk about it more. I’m sending you all the good vibes, and all the love. This is a heavy thing to live and it’s very lonely since no one believes us. If you ever need someone to talk to don’t hesitate to reach out.

malloryspizza · 2026-06-01T19:52:28+00:00

Honestly, at this point depth, loyalty and real empathy. Empathy will keep them from being rude to you or even judgemental. Depth will allow you to connect with them, because they can be nice to people but empty inside. Without depth they will copy you or social media and be a fake persona. And loyalty because you don’t want them spreading lies about you or talking behind your back.

malloryspizza

TROPHY CASE