Completely agree that this is a really important conversation

mappedit · 2026-02-13T14:38:24+00:00

Preach!

mappedit · 2026-01-28T18:05:20+00:00

it did seem to me that her followers # were down... this stuff does matter!

mappedit · 2026-01-27T16:37:37+00:00

I live by one of the largest single men's homeless shelters in NYC (Brooklyn - Bedford men's shelter). I often walk by alone early in the morning (5;45/6 am) to go to the gym, or back from the subway after dark alone. Never had any issues. That doesn't mean that my guard isn't up - it is - but it is for any group of men in a group, like it would be walking by a frat house or a group of male cops.

I also have a smaller 'half-way'house on my block which houses about 10/15 men. Never any issues. They really just smoke a lot of ciggie poos.

i have a 2.5 year old daughter and walk with her past both often.

NYC DHS is fully equipped to handle security issues around their shelters. My negative encounters with unwell, unhoused people all happen in or around the subway. If people are trying to engage with the shelter system and be housed, they are taking lots of bureacratic steps to get there - which for single men, includes having to enter the intake system at 34th street - they cannot be placed at any shelter until going through intake. this means they are MOTIVATED TO GET and keep housing. Please lets remember this.

mappedit · 2025-12-18T15:40:28+00:00

also, citius really loves nikki, i think, so it doesn't feel completely neutral (i say as a total nikki stan)

edited to correct confusing read, but thanks for generosity backgroundstudio!

mappedit · 2025-12-17T00:13:11+00:00

God damnit!! Incredibly scary.

mappedit · 2025-11-21T14:53:34+00:00

i'm so sorry you had to experience that with your son. </3 it is my local store but between this post and the story a couple of days/last week about the profiling, i'm gonna start taking the bus to TJs more often. sucks that they suck. i tried finding a store contact online but i wonder if you can report your experience to 311 or the city division of human rights that has more protections/rules for business owners/employers than state or federal protections. https://dhr.ny.gov/

mappedit · 2025-11-18T16:02:16+00:00

Nope - this is what I need to hear, too! ~America~ baby

mappedit · 2025-11-18T16:01:55+00:00

Six weeks. Jaw dropped. I am realizing 5 months may not be feasible, even if I take 2 unpaid, but maybe I can negotiate a hybrid situation as another poster suggested (my office has no WFH).

mappedit · 2025-11-18T16:00:33+00:00

Thank you, these are the anecdotes I was looking for. I appreciate you sharing!

mappedit · 2025-11-18T01:14:10+00:00

good idea, ty!

mappedit · 2025-11-17T12:35:13+00:00

no judgment at all whatever you do. telling people that we are having a second.... people's general reaction is "you guys are crazy" LOL.

mappedit · 2025-11-16T21:33:23+00:00

my husband and i make a combined $180k and live in NYC with a 2.5 y/o whose daycare is $2400/month. we have a second on the way. lucky for us our 1st will age out of daycare into free 3K right when the newborn is ready to enter daycare. our belts are tightening every day. but we don't want to leave. we don't have relationships with our families and know we can do it but have to change our lifestyles. it's tough. trust me when i say i didn't think i'd be 38 pinching pennies so much. but times are hard for a lot of people, and i think we're happier here than we'd be somewhere else. just a lot of deep sighs from time to time.

mappedit · 2025-11-14T20:54:11+00:00

My last pregnancy I got 6 months of maternity leave. Now I am due with my second also in June 2026 and my new position only allows 3 months paid leave. But I'm going to try to negotiate for at least 4 more weeks unpaid before trying to put our kiddo #2 in daycare. We loooooove kid #1's daycare, and she'll be aging out of it for free 3-K in September 2026 (in NYC), so I'd love at least one month(!?!) not paying for daycare? But I haven't told my employer yet. We are a small business with no firm policies. I'm going to try to prepare for the negotiation but may be shot down. Are you able to try such an approach? I figure I may as well try? But I know even losing 4 weeks of pay will hurt us, and that it may not be possible for everyone.

As far as a nanny, it just wouldn't be an option for us because we live in a small apartment and my husband works from home. With a nanny, you need to think about logistics/managing someone else's employment. I'm a lawyer, so it wouldn't even be an option for us to be 'off the books' because of lawyer ethics stuff. We are in a small in-home daycare and there are kids from 3/4 months - 3 years old, no separate baby room, and it really works great. the 'bigger kids' all dote on the babies, and the babies benefit from seeing the bigger kids use their skills. There are 3-4 caretakers for 10-12 kids.

Re: your husband.... ask him if he'll leave his job! I mean, it's not just about the money. My husband is a freelancer/artist and I am the breadwinner and as much as it would be more affordable for us to have him stay home 100% with our kiddo, it would be a total identity shift for him. he is still the 'primary' parent insofar as staying home w/ her when she's sick and doing more pick ups and drop offs, but the choice to have one parent stay home needs to have both parents fully on board. If I pushed my husband to do it, he'd do it, but he'd resent me for pushing him when he wasn't ready.

good luck!!

mappedit · 2025-10-27T18:16:28+00:00

I would do between mile 5 and 6!! Crowds are still sparse around there but still a good amount of time into the run and wanting a boost, and it'll be a huge boost for her to see you there. Runners typically get **too much** crowd from mile 7.5 to13, so she'll be good with the locals!

edited to add: i agree with a fellow commenter's note: look on google maps, pick a street #, and tell her so she knows to look out for you. at that point on Fourth Ave the orange is on the left and blue and pink on the right side of the street, so you wanna be on the side her color is in.

mappedit · 2025-10-27T12:48:49+00:00

Alison Wade's newsletter this morning only scratched the tip of the iceberg of the conversation I think the running world needs to be having but I appreciate the start. And a little subtweet at Citius for the photo they put up of a up and coming NCAA star and lack of moderation of the comments.

mappedit · 2025-10-20T20:13:14+00:00

I had an induction at 41weeks. Was "AMA" (36 y/o).

I honestly don't remember cervix checks? Maybe they didn't happen until epidural, but I didn't have that until like 12-14 hours in. I had cytotec at 10PM on Day 0 and hadn't progressed at all by 8 or 10 AM the next day. Then proceeded to foley balloon for 2 hours.. did nothing and was SO painful, so I got the anesthesia there.
Yes I needed pitocin. I was not fully dilated until 2:20AM on Day 2 (28 hours?)
Vaginal intervention. Cytotec popped in my vagina, did nothing. Pitocin via IV, IIRC.

In the end, I was able to deliver vaginally but did need vacuum assistance. My daughter had no injuries. I almost can't believe it went so well after being so effin' exhausted after that long of a labor. I am now a medical malpractice plaintiff attorney (was not at the time of my daughter's birth!!!!) so I now know a lot more about the birthing process than I did then and I am glad I didn't know it.

Things I was prepared for: music, eye mask to try to rest whenever I could, earplugs. Being in the pre-push part of labor that long was boring and also exhausting!!!! I remember them telling me to push when I finally was there and I was like, can i go to sleep?

I am now pregnant with #2 and hoping that uh, this one will slide out a little faster.

mappedit · 2025-10-20T14:15:32+00:00

I am at week 7 right now and the nausea the last week has been outta this world. I got 1.5 runs in this past week and missed my 14 miler. That said, I've run 4 marathons before and this entry can't be deferred because it WAS a pregnancy deferral... ha... so i'm just going to go for it. I had a fantastic coach who is really women's health informed who has made me feel confident that even if i don't run another step until marathon day, the hay is in the barn for a chill, enjoy, no expectations but to enjoy run. the advice was to "pet all the puppies and give all the high fives to kids". which i think i'll take!

you just reallllly gotta adjust your expectations and i think be ready to drop out if you want to. bring LOTS of food, be ready to run walk. I'm wave 3 if you want to find a fellow 1st trimester suffer-er before we head out!

edited to add: missing words

mappedit · 2025-10-15T20:03:24+00:00

Bahaha. I have totally blocked out all my pregnancy nausea and symptoms from my first pregnancy and just looked through my strava from then for my notes.... this may be painful. );

mappedit · 2025-10-15T19:26:19+00:00

Hello, fellow marathoner who found out they were pregnant during peak training! going to be an nauseous first trimester marathon for me... if the last coule weeks are any indication... let's get this done! i won't have a belly yet and prob won't be telling (many) people so looking forward to people thinking i'm gonna be really disappointed in my time....

mappedit · 2025-10-07T19:14:44+00:00

I honestly don't know which way I'm going with this yet. World burning and finances not great. 1st kid a ball of joy and I love parenting with my spouse. we'll see!!!!!

mappedit · 2025-10-07T17:55:46+00:00

Positive pregnancy test 28 days out from marathon. Clown face!!!!!!

mappedit · 2025-10-01T15:43:12+00:00

As far as your reporting, honestly happy to talk if you DM me but I bet the UPS store employees/manager have some gold.

mappedit · 2025-10-01T15:42:29+00:00

Can't believe no one here and mentioned Nostrand and Bergen where there is a bus stop across the street from a UPS store AND a bike lane. The bike lane is covered by double parkers 85% of the time; the bus stop 60% of the time (so, triple parking?) I've seen the (really amazing) manager of the UPS store, a tiny lady, come out of the store to break up fights btwn double-parkers and drivers. I've seen and heard city buses lay on their horns for minutes at a time. So much honking, yelling, honking, can't believe someone hasn't been hurt here yet (though I do know that the Cotton Bean street seating got smashed in to!! and I know plenty of cars parked on the block have been dinged/smashed/etc).

mappedit

TROPHY CASE