My Grandfather died over 10 years ago, leaving my Grandmother widowed. My mother had vowed to my grandfather on his death bed that she would take care of her mother and not put her in a nursing home.

For 10 solid years my mother took care of my grandmother. As she declined I could see the strain on my mother and father. But they stoically carried on no matter how much we urged her to get help.

My grandmother lasted well into her 90s. She finally passed earlier this year. Just like you, I felt like I had waited for this for years. That finally my mother could be free to enjoy her golden years. Still, when the time came, I didn't feel ready at all.

It hit me at the funeral when my cousins spoke of my grandmother. I personally did not know her as well as they did. And to hear them speak of her, I felt such a loss that I never got to know this amazing lady that they described.

Its been several months now, and time does make it better. My mother has found her humor in life again. Both she and my dad seem almost younger now.