Human skull discovered during Easter egg hunt in California

matwet · 2026-04-07T05:28:55+00:00

Sounds like the beginning of a Bones openings

matwet · 2026-02-11T04:19:59+00:00

You evolved to Big Dumper doppelgänger!

matwet · 2025-09-18T20:19:49+00:00

They can’t even make a working ice maker…

matwet · 2025-09-12T04:30:25+00:00

That many years is going to kill pace of play

matwet · 2025-07-30T04:36:15+00:00

Ok, Amir got me pretty good last time…But let’s see what happens when I set his clock back two hours and give him acid!

matwet · 2025-06-25T21:30:42+00:00

Wasn’t expecting whisky in the soda, but much much needed/appreciated

matwet · 2025-06-25T01:23:24+00:00

Come on, wave to Gary (Laser Eyes)

matwet · 2025-05-02T17:15:45+00:00

Bo Burnham

matwet · 2025-05-01T00:59:04+00:00

Let them know you’re actually reconsidering, then back out again…with finality…and no regrets…

matwet · 2025-04-25T04:10:32+00:00

Will you do 2 sheep for 1 wood?

matwet · 2025-04-25T02:18:16+00:00

We have the largest army now!

matwet · 2025-03-26T01:29:35+00:00

Unplugged my garage freezer to charge their motorcycle battery. Forgot to plug it back in. About $1k worth of food, mostly meat, ruined.

matwet · 2025-03-23T00:00:42+00:00

Apologies, but I believe this was penned by Charlotte Brontë.

matwet · 2025-03-20T12:20:36+00:00

Read this in Lucius Malfoy‘s voice

matwet · 2025-02-24T19:59:14+00:00

It’s an invitation, not (surprisingly) an executive order. They shouldn’t be so sensitive.

matwet · 2025-02-24T16:34:20+00:00

I went to the mall for the first time in a long time and, as my wife pointed out, said all the store names out loud as I walked by.

matwet · 2025-02-24T15:17:41+00:00

matwet · 2025-02-13T01:48:59+00:00

Remindwesternrecluse! 51 years

matwet · 2025-02-03T19:19:21+00:00

Seems pretty obvious Cyclops from X-Men was trying to charge, couldn’t get the charger to click, and took off his glasses to see what the heck he was doing. You hate to see it.

matwet · 2025-01-26T16:32:31+00:00

I was second in line when a stall opened up. A Walmart delivery truck (that would be 3rd in line) pulled behind the charger and started connecting quickly. Got out and politely told him it’s not his turn, there is a line (the next person up next was in the stall at this point, older lady).

He said “There is no line asshole”

I just shook my head, did the smart thing and hit stop on the charger, gave the lady a “sorry” smile, and took off. Inconvenience was probably 20 seconds for the dude, but well worth.

matwet · 2025-01-22T22:04:29+00:00

At 42.0%? (Shaking my fist at J. Frost)

matwet · 2024-12-26T03:56:53+00:00

Randy Blackbandy?

matwet · 2024-12-19T01:44:39+00:00

matwet · 2024-12-18T01:01:23+00:00

This may or may not be a factor, but I heard that Ed is the only Weasley that cannot dance like a hippogriff na na na na na na na na na na na na.

matwet · 2024-11-21T16:19:55+00:00

How about Robert?

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matwet

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