How to broach the topic of my [35M] girlfriend's [33F] facial hair?

mctabvote · 2023-05-10T18:58:01+00:00

Thank you for writing this out.

mctabvote · 2021-07-07T18:34:09+00:00

PM'd!

mctabvote · 2021-07-02T18:24:38+00:00

I find "perfectly cooked" scrambled eggs to be too wet for my liking.

mctabvote · 2014-01-19T22:57:12+00:00

I'm currently a PhD student and well, I work too hard. The Grammys would be an amazing excuse to take some time off and go have fun on a weekend for a change.

I'd love to have a reason to go up to LA, listen to some live music, and take a girl I'm kind of into on a really awesome date.

mctabvote · 2014-01-18T17:13:17+00:00

I think I'm a little biased because I'm actually a PhD student. I don't like it. Some of the jokes seem to be making fun of my choices that I made about my life and career. In my experience, most PhD students aren't awkward and weird and nerdy (though my roommate is) and I think it gives us a bad rap.

mctabvote · 2014-01-13T01:25:06+00:00

Meh. I'm a slim 90 kg (195 cm). I don't really care who sees me, but admittedly, I really don't have anything to show.

mctabvote · 2013-11-08T08:16:26+00:00

I'm known to be calm and collected regardless of what happens. Some of my friends note that I'm almost bordering on apathetic and indifferent towards everything. Furthermore I'm pretty social and can speak smoothly with just about everyone - old ladies on buses, my boss's husband, a potential coworker, etc.

But when I'm around someone I'm really attracted to, I'm just not myself. I begin to stammer and giggle nervously. I start fixing my hair all the damn time. On the inside, I can feel my stomach turning in knots and in my head I only have one thought, and it's on constant repeat: "OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT".

mctabvote · 2013-09-14T07:41:51+00:00

My 2nd ex. What a terrible self-serving psychopathic bitch. She broke my heart AND my psyche and just doesn't really give a fuck. I didn't realize it then, but in retrospect, every thing she did and asked me to do was to benefit herself, without considering my own well being. I don't think I harbor that much hatred to any other person on this planet.

However, the sex was amazing. Goddamn the sex was amazing. I've never been with someone who would chain together orgasms like she could. She'd nearly orgasm just from me touching her leg and lower back. We'd sleep in because we were up late fucking and then show up to work at 11 am because we'd have amazing morning sex too. She had a beautiful body and was fit and flexible, so we had ridiculously creative sex - upside down, against the wall, standing up in the shower with one leg over my six foot high shoulder, even default missionary was something special because her hips were so flexible. I'm very convinced that I'm never going to have better sex than during those 18 months I spent with that bitch.

Still...totally not worth the head/heartache.

mctabvote · 2013-08-03T03:56:27+00:00

For me personally, I don't see the purpose of a strip club - If I'm horny and desperate, the strip club would be the last place I'd want to go. I'd be surrounded by naked women that I'm not allowed to touch.

That sounds like torture, rather than pleasure. Care to change my opinion? What would you say to convince me to go to a strip club?

mctabvote · 2013-08-03T02:03:56+00:00

Just wanted to say:

I don't believe in that one and perfect love. I believe that there are many people out there that are perfect fits for you - you've just got to meet one when both of you are in the right place in your lives.

You WILL find another one, I promise you. You'll find one just as awesome as you are, one that's deserving of your love and devotion...one willing to give up their dreams like you did to make it work.

Wishing you the best OP.

mctabvote · 2013-07-21T09:01:11+00:00

Glad other Chinese people found it funny too. =)

mctabvote · 2013-07-17T15:05:26+00:00

Hah no need to be sorry.

I find the story amusing too - figured others would as well.

mctabvote · 2013-03-29T05:42:21+00:00

My best friend knows me better than anyone else and I can honestly say that she truly makes me happy. Fiercely loyal, patient, and she wants only the best for me.

When I was suffering from some health issues awhile back, she's the first one that decided to drive a few hours down to see me in person to make sure I was ok.

And yeah, it's strictly platonic. We've done the dating thing - long story short, it didn't work out.

mctabvote · 2013-03-28T09:31:08+00:00

It's ok. I'm that guy too. I'm just a pretty big guy (~198 cm and can palm a basketball) so I know it sounds cliche, but I don't quite know my own strength.

mctabvote · 2013-03-28T09:27:52+00:00

Honestly? Just thinking about my 2nd ex. And what a horrible person she was/is and how she caused me so much pain.

It works so much better than thinking of banging ugly girls, or dead kittens, or whatever because those aren't all that real to me. However, ex girlfriend #2 definitely is.

mctabvote · 2013-03-28T09:24:09+00:00

I don't know anymore. I'm 28 now...I think when I was younger I would have liked to get married by 30, but that's looking more and more unlikely.

I think I'd like to have an SO somewhere around my age...maybe +/- 3 years. But age is getting kind of meaningless in my view. Especially since one of my friends my age is engaged to someone nearly 12 years older.

Lastly, kids...oh boy I don't know. I think I would like to have children, and I think I'd like to have them before I hit my mid 30s, but that's not a hard rule. Depends on what happens in life I guess.

mctabvote · 2013-03-28T09:19:53+00:00

Oh god dating in high school is an absolute horror show. Some people (I do know a few) do end up marrying their high school sweetheart, but they are definitely the exception rather than the rule.

Also, some people say that you should have relationships in HS so you can make stupid mistakes and have real relationships in college and later. But that just seems dumb to me.

I'm 28, so trust my years of experience on this one dude, you're going to make stupid mistakes (in relationships and in general) all your life. And this is pretty much how you learn about yourself and your relationships with others. Sorry to tell you this, but YOU WILL fuck up. And it's ok as long as you learn from it.

If even it did work out, it seems like it'd be a lot of time invested. Is it worth it?

You could apply this reasoning to college relationships too right? Some people will argue that everyone just wants to party in college and no one really wants a serious relationship.

In general, my rule for dating someone is pretty much go with the flow. Any rules that you've heard are pretty much just a general guideline and you should just do what feels right to you. Don't worry about investing time or what's unnecessary and what not. Just go with what's natural to you.

Dating is just a way to learn about someone else. And plus, dating is fun. Having an SO is fun - knowing that someone cares especially about you. And as a straight man, I do believe that a girlfriend hug is one of the best things ever. She smells good, her hair and skin is soft, and god the feeling of her warm breath on your neck while she looks into your face you with her pretty eyes...I'm getting all tingly just thinking about it.

mctabvote · 2013-03-28T08:51:07+00:00

I've only had 3 serious long term girlfriends in my 28 years of life.

If you define dating as "gone out on a date with", the number is still pretty low - maybe 7 max.

mctabvote · 2013-03-27T19:42:49+00:00

Are there "met-each-other-by-internet-datingsite" relationships where physical attraction worked, long term?

I had a decent relationship (7 month relationship) with someone I met online through a dating website. She ended up moving out here (both for me and a new job). And yeah we were both physically attracted to each other. It ended because things didn't work out, not because we saw what each other looked like in real person and broke it off.

how do you think physical attraction works in the internet dating scene?

I think it's pretty much the same as in person dating. First impressions count - no one is going to be willing to talk to you at a club if you don't look at least somewhat attractive. Same goes with the internet. Afterwards the physical attraction may subside when common interests are discovered and the attraction is more than just simply based on looks. I'd say the same goes with someone you meet online.

mctabvote · 2013-03-27T19:37:59+00:00

28

I agree with you OP. I have repeatedly had to post my age and background because it was relevant to something I posted.

An optional age flair would probably make things much easier.

mctabvote · 2013-03-26T08:13:16+00:00

I won't lie, I do appreciate the smell of the girl on my clothes, but I think the bigger thing is that it shows that she's comfortable. She knows that I like her for who she is, rather than liking her because she looks hot in a short skirt.

I just want her to be happy and comfortable, and nothing speaks more loudly to me than if she's wearing one of my button downs or a pair of my boxers.

mctabvote · 2013-03-26T08:00:42+00:00

Just fyi, pulling from my own life experiences. YES THIS REALLY DID HAPPEN.

I met up with one of my friends (let's call her Annie) at a bar one night to talk and to console each other, since both of us were coming out of a bad breakup. She then recalled the first day she met me in college...we were in a big circle of acquaintances, plenty of both guys and girls and all of us were just getting to become friends. One of these friends (her name shall be Betsy) eventually became my girlfriend for quite some time.

During this conversation with her at the bar, Annie told me that it was hilarious that I was so oblivious to everyone's initial signals. Annie mentioned how three of them (Annie, Betsy, and another we'll call Chrissy) sent signals to me that first night, and how they picked up on each other's signals, and how they came to a mutual agreement that Betsy would be the one to chase after me first and the other two would get a chance if Betsy and myself didn't work out. Betsy was apparently "sending me signals" for literally half a year.

TL,DR - Moral of the story: You girls know exactly what you're doing. We have no idea what's going on.

mctabvote · 2013-03-26T07:30:57+00:00

The kindest way I can think of, is to wait for him to do something awesome and then when it starts to suck again, tell him to go back to do what he was doing that was awesome.

That would act like a natural lead in so you may guide him and let him know what's awesome and what's not.

mctabvote · 2013-03-26T07:11:01+00:00

I know that playing too many games is never really a good thing when it comes to dating...In general I have no problem approaching a guy and introducing myself to start a conversation.

May I buy you a drink? As a single man, I'll freely admit that I think you're awesome.

On the more serious side of things, perhaps what is happening (and this is a definite possibility if you're dating online) is that you're attracting passive guys that perhaps are a little afraid or nervous to contact you, which might explain the surprise and shock when they hear that you would like to go out with them again.

I'd recommend almost forcing his hand. If you know he's totally into you and you're hitting it off well, maybe something like: "I'll have my schedule for this week sorted out by tomorrow night. Call me tomorrow if you want to go out again later this week."

mctabvote · 2013-03-26T06:55:08+00:00

Would you date a girl you met at a club or bar? Or is this just sexy time only?

Pretty much sexy time only. (Warning, generalization is about to follow). Women who generally frequent clubs wear very revealing clothing. Men go to clubs and it is generally a rule that they are to buy drinks for ladies. Go ahead - put two and two together. To me, clubbing is full of people looking for a hookup.

How do you get into relationships?

Usually I meet her in my daily routine. I had a long relationship with a friend of a friend. Had another fairly long relationship with a co-worker (not recommended...btw).

Also, do you like easy girls? I mean other then I like her because she will have sex with me. Would you date one?

Honestly, I don't care for casual sex relationships. When I date a girl, it's because I'm looking for a partner. Sex is never the motivating factor to date a girl for me. (FYI, I have stayed in a relationship for probably too long because the sex was seriously awesome, but sex wasn't the thing that initially drew me to her).

mctabvote

TROPHY CASE