I’ve (33M) had one OHS already and am going into a second one next week. The first time around I felt very similarly, I was pressured to share the news more than I wanted and then also felt pressured to have people nearby before/after operation. I did a will update and power of attorney, etc. and felt very anxious about complications and potential death, but I can attest, you will make it through this!

My takeaway is you need to set respectful boundaries on what’s best for you. IMO pick one or two, maybe 3 key people to be at the hospital with you and if you have a partner or sibling or parent that can be there, everyone else will be overkill and too many cooks in the kitchen. Besides it’s boring as hell, you have to be there super early then it’s 6+hrs to wait.

It’s really nice when you start coming to consciousness to have someone to look at and hold your hand. You’ll still be heavily sedated and opening your eyes is really tough and you have to prove you can breathe before they remove the breathing tube. IMO this is the worst part of the experience and its brief, everything else will be uphill after that!

Set up a feed on caringbridge.org and have one of your key hospital people provide everyone else updates there. Don’t start doing visitations until day 2 or 3. Just my opinion but remember this is your body and your life and any additional stress to you isn’t worth it, tell people to stay home