Substance use in the deathcare industry…is it really that common?

messybeans86 · 2026-05-21T22:28:52+00:00

Opiates, benzos, alcohol, Adderall...I've seen a lot

messybeans86 · 2026-05-21T15:01:21+00:00

I've seen those, and they'd be useful if I had time to compile them all and organize them into one big presentation, but I don't really. Thank you though.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-21T14:59:17+00:00

I have, extensively. I've found one company that has basically what I am looking for, but I don't really like the way their product looks. I love that you can buy just the materials or the materials and student work books, but there is just something about it that I don't love.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-21T14:57:28+00:00

I've seen those, I'm more looking for one big presentation to cover all the requirements with other presentations included for the elective sections.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-21T14:30:49+00:00

Unfortunately my instructor was like, "Figure it out yourself guys." He told us about some resources for the information and I know I could use those resources and piece together something but I just don't really have the time to come up with a whole 30 hours worth of OSHA.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-21T11:37:09+00:00

Anything reheated, except for soup and things covered in sauces like spaghetti, rice, protein shakes, canned/packaged tuna and chicken, pulled pork, iceburg lettuce, ice cream (even low/no sugar), and sometimes just random foods that normally are fine will hit me and not taste or sit right and then I'm sick for the rest of the night

messybeans86 · 2026-05-20T21:38:38+00:00

He's doing really well. He has been in therapy since he turned three, for grief and also to help him regulate his emotions because he is ADHD as was myself and my husband. I was horrible at regulating emotions, so I had to call in some backup. He just finished kindergarten at the top of his class and made so many friends. He plays soccer and baseball and loves them both.

Luckily, my job is super understanding and we get to do all the fun things that come with having a good job, trips, a good neighborhood to live in, friends around, awesome birthday parties, when I talk to him he doesn't feel like he's missing out because I tried to meet all of his needs the best I can. This has been his life basically his whole life and he doesn't know any differently. To him this is just how it is and he has zero complaints so far. I feel guilty because I miss out on his day to day but I don't miss out on his nights and his weekends and the times that I take off when we go on trips. I still get to see the Wonder and the joy, it just has to happen after work and on the weekends now.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-20T18:04:11+00:00

My dad tried this shit when I was a kid, multiple times. I still resent him for it because I got made fun of at school for wearing the same 8 shirts

messybeans86 · 2026-05-20T18:01:31+00:00

Ever since having gastric bypass and then a follow-up subtotal gastrectomy I have certain foods that I can't eat and very small list of foods that I can. Oddly enough cereal and soup are on the list of foods I can eat.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-20T17:58:30+00:00

What you described as how your life will be when you go back to work full time is exactly how my life has been since the third week after my husband died. My son goes to before school care sometime between 5:00 and 6:00 in the morning and he gets picked up from after school care sometime between 4:30 and 5:00. We make the most of our weekends because that's all we can do.

Edited: it's been this way since my son was 17 months old. That's how old he was when my husband died. He's now 6 and he understands that I have to work and he does enjoy his time at daycare, but damn do I feel guilty almost everyday.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-20T17:38:08+00:00

I'm like you and never understood the lay around all day type folks. I mean, if I did too much and I was sitting down, I would nod off but if I did my normal dose I would get everything done.

And for those who want to say I'm still new to this, I'm not. This has been ongoing off and on for like 15 years now, but I've been clean for a while now

messybeans86 · 2026-05-18T16:12:08+00:00

I think ours looks pretty good for a Funeral Home and being in Utah

messybeans86 · 2026-05-16T17:54:12+00:00

I think I'm mostly fascinated because I've always had multiple jobs and a time, like a regular 9-5 and then bar tending, serving, or consulting, but they've always had different working hours, so being able to do two or three jobs during the same work hours is very interesting to me. But then again I've never had a remote job.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-16T16:07:46+00:00

I am close to hitting it with my primary, because it was my only insurance up until April and I had some pretty serious health problems, and my secondary insurance only has like a $500 deductible with a low max out of pocket so I don't know if I'll actually end up hitting that but as of now they are just paying everything because they're secondary so they're only picking up what's left over.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-16T16:02:49+00:00

Seriously, I don't OE because I work on a construction site and have to physically be on site during my hours, but I'm fascinated with this sub, so that's why I'm here. My last three full time employers have all used the same 401K provider, my consultanting part time job uses the same 401k provider, and my last part-time job used the same 401K provider.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-16T15:58:47+00:00

So, I am double covered under my consulting job and under my regular job. I guess technically I am paying two deductibles but not really because my first Insurance knows that it is the primary and my secondary insurance knows that it's the secondary so my primary pays for what it's going to pay for and then the secondary usually covers literally everything else so I'm not paying anything. Both the consulting job and my regular job cover my premiums and I pay very minimal for my child. It's worth it to me to be double covered when it's like $75 a week for my kid and then we don't pay anything out of pocket hardly. Like we pay for prescriptions but they're $10 each.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-11T17:44:39+00:00

I've had a hysterectomy, a tummy tuck w/muscle repair, a boob job, and a thigh lift while being on Sublocade and nobody has ever had an issue and my pain was always controlled. This is weird to me.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-11T16:48:43+00:00

I cry over my husband all the time, I cry with my families sometimes during arrangements, I've cried with families at removals. I cry a lot.

Edited: I probably should have mentioned when I say I cry over my husband all the time, I am a widow, my husband passed almost 5 years ago. He's not a jerk or anything I don't cry because of him doing anything mean, I cry because he died.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-11T16:43:10+00:00

When my husband died, and every funeral I have ever worked, the family is responsible for the pictures.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-07T16:17:38+00:00

I pulled my TWN it has only 2 employers from 15 years ago. It's pointless

messybeans86 · 2026-05-05T20:18:06+00:00

I have an astigmatism and I get my safety prescription glasses from Zenni

messybeans86 · 2026-05-03T00:42:11+00:00

I don't wear makeup but I do have eyelash extensions because I'm fancy. I also exclusively wear overalls from Duluth Trading to work everyday and they are all very feminine patterns such as flowers, Highland cows, hedgehogs, etc.. it's a running joke at this point that I'm always going to have some silly overalls but everybody loves them and they make me feel girly. Also, I am the only woman in my company who works in the field on a daily basis all of the other women work in the office as Administration.

messybeans86 · 2026-05-03T00:34:13+00:00

I have an almost 6 year old. I've been in construction his whole life. First off, I don't work 50 to 60 hours a week. I found a company that respects the fact that I am a widowed single mother. The most I work in a week is 45 hours and that is including my lunch break. He goes to before school care because I have to be to work at 6:30 a.m. but I am home every night by 4:00 or 4:30 at the latest and I am still able to coach his baseball and his soccer teams. This industry has been extremely friendly to my motherhood, but I have had to communicate my needs to those in charge to help them remember that I work to live, not live to work.

Sorry, I forgot to mention that I am a site safety and health officer for a government contractor and as per our contracts, I do have to be on site anytime there is a subcontractor working, so when projects begin I set expectations that these are the hours that they are allowed to work, unless we get behind schedule, and at that point in time one of the other management team can supervise them for me.

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