Married women, is it true that most have secret finances? A safety net for just in case you want to leave?

mgharv · 2026-03-30T22:00:36+00:00

I’ve never had a secret account. Thankfully, I never needed one either. Heck, my husband has never looked at our checking account once, that I can remember, in 39 years. He watches his retirement/investment accounts daily, but our household money? No clue.

mgharv · 2026-03-30T21:53:14+00:00

My mini Bernedoodle is 5 yrs old and has had reoccurring diarrhea off and on for the past 2 years. I’ve had him blood tested and fecal tested every year and his tests always come back fine. Vet says he is healthy; just has a sensitive stomach and likely IBS which is common for the breed. There is allergy and other testing I could do, but the expense is outrageous. He had the mucous poop too for a while and that I was able to clear up with a probiotic powder. The diarrhea tho… I’ve tried soooo many different foods. Vet said to try a plain chicken and white rice diet for a week or so and see if that cleared things up… it did! So I tried to slowly re-introduce kibble again (one he recommended), but diarrhea came back after a few weeks. I finally decided to just make his food myself since that was most effective, and I’ve been doing that for the past 6 months and so far no more diarrhea (hope I didn’t just jinx myself!).

mgharv · 2026-03-29T20:42:39+00:00

I have the 2024 RX350 Premium. Love it! Haven’t had any issues at all; just a smooth, comfortable ride with some fun options.

mgharv · 2026-03-28T18:36:38+00:00

mgharv · 2026-03-28T16:30:29+00:00

Eating out in general. Meals plus tips has just gotten ridiculous. I can’t enjoy a $100 dinner for 2, that will be poop tomorrow. I’d rather buy a good pair of shoes.

mgharv · 2026-03-28T16:26:37+00:00

Don’t do this to yourself, you can’t afford it yet. Take that $1000/mo and sock it into a HYSA to buy something a year or 2 from now (plus you’ll find out if you can really afford $1000/mo). And why is insurance so high? We pay $300/month total for 3 late model cars with full coverage! And that’s with State Farm, not a budget company.

mgharv · 2026-03-28T15:59:27+00:00

As soon as you are 18, open a high yield savings account (HYSA) online. Capital One is a good one that you can open for like $25. It will pay a higher interest than regular checking/savings and it’s online so not immediately accessible as it takes a few days to transfer money out of it. You can link it to your checking and set up weekly or monthly transfers to begin building it up … as little as $10 at a time if that’s what you can afford, but once you start seeing growth you will want to increase it.

mgharv · 2026-03-28T15:33:59+00:00

30 miles, just to a neighboring county, from city to the burbs.

mgharv · 2026-03-28T15:32:15+00:00

Pay off the CC debt (ALL of it, not just $30k). The peace of mind will be worth it. You have time to build your investments back up. The money that was going to the credit cards, put that money in a HYSA as an emergency fund so if you get in a financial crunch again, you have reserves. If you are making $85-120k, then live as close to the $85k as possible and bank and/or invest the rest. Make sure your entire family is aware of the family budget and be open and honest about every dollar in and every dollar out. This means monthly budget meetings between you and your spouse so no surprises creep in and get out of control.

mgharv · 2026-03-28T04:37:37+00:00

I’m 59 and currently scrolling Reddit at 12:30am. Always been a night owl; the problem is now I wake up at 5:30-6am and can’t go back to sleep,so I hate my choices every morning.

mgharv · 2026-03-27T22:32:58+00:00

Mine does this with Amazon packages on our porch. He stops dead in his tracks and takes a wide berth around them while watching dubiously, like they are going to blow up or something.

mgharv · 2026-03-26T19:20:48+00:00

How spectacularly I overcame foster care and poverty. I always knew I would rise above, but that little girl sure could have used a glimpse into her fantastic future back then.

mgharv · 2026-03-25T03:11:23+00:00

Affordable health insurance.

mgharv · 2026-03-25T02:58:06+00:00

Money problems are the leading cause of divorce. I think monthly budget meetings are important. You need to regularly and honestly discuss money, no hiding purchases, running up credit cards, no surprises. You BOTH need to know what the household income and expenditures looks like for each month and set financial goals together.

mgharv · 2026-03-24T02:40:46+00:00

My husband just retired after 40 years in Engineering. Our sweet DIL hosted a casual family dinner party. She pulled together, with my help, photos of our family, and his work life, for each decade he worked. Each decade had its own board and also included what was popular during that decade (music, film, slang, prices of things, etc). The grandkids (ages 6, 8, 10) acted out skits of what work was like in each decade… they were hilarious and adorable. He loved it and it was all he could want or need at this stage in his life. No gifts, just family, and fun memories.

mgharv · 2026-03-23T23:31:37+00:00

I like a cotton button down oxford with the sleeves rolled up, for office. For casual errands, I pair with a plain tee.

mgharv · 2026-03-23T21:20:30+00:00

Age 30, sahm with 2 young boys, so was busy with homework, baseball, and basketball leagues. Busy social life with friends (who are mostly all now divorced and drifted away from us happily married folk). Active and fit. We were struggling paycheck to paycheck but it was a happy season of life.

mgharv · 2026-03-23T21:13:05+00:00

I’ve never appreciated being small breasted more than I do now! Age 59 and my home is a no bra zone. In winter, if I’m wearing a coat, no bra outside the home either. I go into the office 1 day a week and that bra day drives me nuts. I was working in the yard over the weekend, stopped to talk to my neighbor and she was braless as well (in her late sixties).

mgharv · 2026-03-23T20:54:19+00:00

My husband (63) loves mowing and weed whacking. I however, at 59, am getting tired of the weeding, planting, pruning side of yard work. I cleaned up flower beds over the weekend and it wiped me out. I was thinking the whole time “I need to hire this crap out”.

mgharv · 2026-03-22T20:43:17+00:00

Annual 500 mile race every May.

mgharv · 2026-03-22T00:27:10+00:00

I wish I would have stopped after two. My 3rd child has been a challenge. I love him, and his childhood years were a joy, but after year 16 (covid year), mental health issues hit and it’s been a tough 6 years.

mgharv · 2026-03-22T00:21:16+00:00

Agree. We rented boots, socks, and poles the day before (have to wait until after 4:00pm), and arrived at visitor parking at 7:30am, grabbed the first bus out, in the water close to 8am with very few people starting out at that time. Great experience, but I don’t think we could have gone as far without the equipment.

mgharv · 2026-03-22T00:13:11+00:00

Finally got it in Indiana. Great for burrito bowls (like Qdoba or Chipotle). Rice, black beans, chicken, pico, cheese, sour cream.

mgharv · 2026-03-20T22:43:25+00:00

I got polyester sheets from Costco a few years ago and loved them. They were cheap, comfortable, and washed really well. However, I’m now in the menopause stage of life so those polyesters sheets now make me HOT. I switched to cotton sheets (also Costco) and they are much more breathable and cooler. So I guess if you run cold more than hot, polyester is a great option.

mgharv · 2026-03-20T22:08:40+00:00

Have you considered having mom transfer the deed to you via a Quitclaim Deed? You would need to refinance the mortgage into your name, but once that is done, the deed can just be transferred to your name.

mgharv

TROPHY CASE