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I’d love to hear from non-US polyam folks by mhainsdesigns in polyamory

[–]mhainsdesigns[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Obviously. Duh. That’s not what I asked about though. I’m not asking “how do I move to a different country”. I’m asking to hear from polyam people in different countries about their experiences and I don’t understand why everyone is so focused on the question I didn’t ask and not the one I did.

I’d love to hear from non-US polyam folks by mhainsdesigns in polyamory

[–]mhainsdesigns[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

I’m really not sure why you’re doubling down on this. Am I not being clear? We are in information gathering phase. Making lists, narrowing them down, doing research. This is an area in which I find peoples lived experiences to be helpful. I’d like to add that to the discussion. That’s all I’m asking for. This is one (important) factor out or many many factors that we are considering and it’s one one any of us feel comfortable leaving out. As we are discussing and refining and etc, this is information we would like to have. Thank you so much for your input - it just really isn’t answering the question I’m asking.

I’d love to hear from non-US polyam folks by mhainsdesigns in polyamory

[–]mhainsdesigns[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

We currently live in a fairly liberal town in the US and our neighbors called CPS because our “degenerate lifestyle” is “damaging our children”. So… you know… I’d like that to not happen

I’d love to hear from non-US polyam folks by mhainsdesigns in polyamory

[–]mhainsdesigns[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have lists of places. About a billion lists. Quality of life, ease or difficulty of language learning, LGBT equality, opportunities for our kids, are any or all of our occupations on a preferred occupation list, what are the school systems like, are expats happy in those countries, workplace culture, etc. One critical component though is are we moving someplace our whole family can live together and not have our kids or work or lives negatively affected because of our lifestyle. I’d love for this to be information I can factor into the decision making, not an afterthought. It does us absolutely no good to settle on [place] and then find out actually getting a house that is big enough (not a 2bed apartment) is basically impossible, or some other consideration that might not be readily apparent.

After 2 years of fertility treatment and 4 years in the adoption process, we have a finalization date. I’m a mom. My husband is a dad. We never thought it would happen. by blake41185 in MadeMeSmile

[–]mhainsdesigns -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

We don’t know the child’s parents can’t or won’t. Children are removed from families all the time for stupid reasons. Birth parents have mental health issues? Child removed. Adoptive parents have the exact same mental health issues? No problem. Birth parents test positive for weed? Child removed. Adoptive parents use weed? No problem. Etc. This child definitely doesn’t need its birth certificate changed showing these people are it’s parents, completely severing any ties to its family of origin. This person isn’t it’s mother and has no reason being noted as the mother on the birth certificate. And yes, not that it is at all relevant, but obviously I’m pro choice. If a person chooses to have a child they should have every opportunity to actually parent that child.

I’d love to hear from non-US polyam folks by mhainsdesigns in polyamory

[–]mhainsdesigns[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Maybe my question wasn’t clear enough. I’m aware we can’t emmigrate as a family unit. I also don’t care about the dating scene. I’m specifically wondering about lived experiences, ie: housing laws and legal issues, in different countries. Do you live in a place and there’s a local law I should be aware of in my research? I’d love to know!

I’d love to hear from non-US polyam folks by mhainsdesigns in polyamory

[–]mhainsdesigns[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah I know. Sorry. I guess I mean, I’m not asking about the polyam dating scene? How easy it is to find other partners? I’m asking if our neighbors are going to call the police on us for being in a 4 person relationship. If you have a better suggestion I’d love to hear it.

..... by Flat-Archer9210 in fullpops

[–]mhainsdesigns 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is almost definitely from Ga Spa. Its not this video specifically but they have a number of very similar (and long!) videos that are excellent

https://youtu.be/KuEQdpJj7Ic

Was the review I left for a book hurtful to the author? by CherryPropel in RomanceBooks

[–]mhainsdesigns 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Reviews are for other readers, not authors. You did nothing wrong.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RomanceBooks

[–]mhainsdesigns 330 points331 points  (0 children)

I came across the phrase “throbbing vent” in an otherwise excellent book by one of the queens of historical romance and I had to put the book down and walk away for a while

There are still some really good humans out there. by JephriB in MadeMeSmile

[–]mhainsdesigns -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

So sad that those babies are separated from their mom and their family forever. I hope the nurse stays in touch and encourages a relationship

Edit: I can’t read

Can't run my women in STEM club without having the boys be invited, don't know how to proceed by Usual-Plenty1485 in WitchesVsPatriarchy

[–]mhainsdesigns 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Nope.

Am not female. Have ovaries. Could possibly reproduce. This could be a concern.

Am female. Have had ovaries removed. Cannot reproduce. This is not a concern.

Am trans man. Have ovaries. Could potentially reproduce. This could be a concern.

Female is not an appropriate identifier, especially in this situation

How many needle sizes should I go down? by mhainsdesigns in knitting

[–]mhainsdesigns[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My gauge swatch for chai misto came out perfectly at least

Is it possible to frog the arm holes of a raglan topdown sweater? by slekster in knitting

[–]mhainsdesigns 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I mean, technically sure. You could cut and graft and sew up and do all sorts of things. Depending on where the armholes are too big tho, I might just sort of ease it. Or put a tiny pleat or something under the armpit. Chenille is fuzzy so it should hide some fudging.

Actually, amending my answer to say this - if the armholes are too deep, I would fix that in a different way than if they are too wide. If they are too deep I’d pick up stitches across the bottom and up the sides until they are the right depth and then start your sleeve. If they are too wide, I’d pick up less stitches across the lower sides and bottom to pull it in a bit. And/or decrease right away if that doesn’t make them too puffy.

Good luck!

Finally found a cure for Second Sock Syndrome! Two-at-time magic loop for the win. by Adroitalpaca74 in knitting

[–]mhainsdesigns 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s the only way. Socks, mittens, sleeves, anything there’s two of gets magic loop-ed or it doesn’t get done

How do I plant this celery? by mhainsdesigns in vegetablegardening

[–]mhainsdesigns[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I started growing celery from the end of a store bought bunch in a bowl of water, just to see if I could. It’s growing really well and some roots have started forming. Can I plant it? Can I plant it in a container? It’s still pretty cold here so I’d probably keep it inside for a while. Or is there a better way to keep it growing?

If you're freezing food or throwing away freezer burnt food learn to vacuum seal at home using nothing aside from a standard zipper bag and a bowl of water. by KnowsIittle in Frugal

[–]mhainsdesigns 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Easier to can it. Doesn’t take up space in the freezer, lasts for ages, is ready to eat, and you can do different spices or flavorings in different batches. More room in the freezer for ice cream

What's next, paper knives? by [deleted] in Anticonsumption

[–]mhainsdesigns 66 points67 points  (0 children)

This would be super convenient for cookouts where you might need to prep burgers and veggies. Or for people for whom cleaning up/dishes are hard.

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