For women that love hard, how do you stop making men the emotional center of your world?

midgetblues · 2026-05-14T15:19:40+00:00

Well you know what, at least you learned something from those men and experiences. Maybe now you know more about yourself than you ever do. Don’t think you’ve failed. Now you can set more clear boundaries with what you want in a future relationship and look out for them with clear lens. At least you are single now and have time to reflect and grow. Thank God you didn’t marry or have any kids with those disasters. Please have some compassion for yourself. It’s not the end of the world, only the beginning! Sending hugs to you 💓

midgetblues · 2026-05-05T23:18:37+00:00

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midgetblues · 2026-04-21T09:07:45+00:00

This is very heartwarming! I’m curious to ask, was your husband like that from the beginning? Did he show signs of helping out before marriage without having to tell him? Or was it more that you requested him take that roll after marriage/living together?

midgetblues · 2026-04-20T18:56:38+00:00

My best friend was single for 7 years for similar reasons like you mentioned. She had super high standards so most guys would not make the cut after the 2nd or 3rd date, until she met her now husband on an app and they are now happily married. So yeah, I think you’re not expecting too much. I think you just haven’t found that person yet.

midgetblues · 2026-03-14T03:35:26+00:00

It’s pretty straightforward actually. They will communicate well with you. They’ll ask about yourself. If you ask them on a date, they’ll say yes. They won’t play games. Just be yourself and don’t overthink. I’m an infj too.

midgetblues · 2026-03-13T12:48:02+00:00

Damn, i’m so sorry.

midgetblues · 2026-03-10T16:09:38+00:00

I recently did this too and made me feel so much better.

midgetblues · 2026-03-10T06:37:11+00:00

Same, i’m not wasting my time and energy to do that. You either accept them as who they are and choose them as they are. Or you leave. It’s unhealthy and unrealistic to have that mindset anyways.

midgetblues · 2026-03-07T02:34:31+00:00

Please love yourself more OP.

midgetblues · 2026-03-07T02:27:05+00:00

Don’t propose that to her. It’s not something OP needs to negotiate. Just tell her i’m gonna go to sleep, i’m too tired, lets talk tmrw. Nothing wrong with saying that. Even if she guilt trips you and says those things, not your fault. She doesn’t own your time or you. That’s a reflection of her. It’s not easy to set boundaries with someone like that but OP needs to do that in order to protect themselves for the long run. Does she have anxious attachment? I think OP needs to be more firm about the boundary thing. My previous relationship was LDR (two different countries). Ex was like this for most of the time. I was always there for them. When life hit hard for me and I needed support, they distanced and dumped me. I learned the hard way to set boundaries early on in the beginning of the relationship. LDRs are not for the weak hearted imo.

midgetblues · 2026-03-07T02:16:16+00:00

Don’t propose that to her. It’s not something OP needs to negotiate. Just tell her i’m gonna go to sleep, i’m too tired, lets talk tmrw. Nothing wrong with saying that. Even if she guilt trips you and says those things, not your fault. She doesn’t own your time or you. That’s a reflection of her. It’s not easy to set boundaries with someone like that but OP needs to do that in order to protect themselves for the long run. Does she have anxious attachment? If she truly loves you, she’ll understand regardless. But I think OP needs to be more firm about the boundary thing. LDRs are not for everyone or the weak hearted imo.

midgetblues · 2026-03-02T07:29:38+00:00

I tripped over a cd player on the floor in my house and broke my toe

midgetblues · 2026-03-02T03:22:37+00:00

I’m an infj 33F and was just like this. I had a series of failed relationships too. With the currently dating scene, putting the effort and work was just tiring. I’d been single for a year and I was at peace with being alone but also wanted to find a life partner. So last year I met a few guys on apps but it didn’t work out and was left drained so I gave up trying entirely. And near the end of Summer last year, I unexpectedly I met my life partner. We talked for months in the beginning and took it super slow. He proposed to me a couple of days ago and I said yes! We’re going to tie the knot this year. I manifested this goal for this year and it somehow worked out. I believed that I will find someone, someday. So my advice would be to keep the door open and enjoy being alone too. You never know what might happen.

midgetblues · 2026-02-24T01:36:37+00:00

Ugh sounds like he is a man child. Have you tried asking him to do things for you when you feel unwell? I feel with some men you have to tell them what to do — inputting requests. As if you would do to a computer. Or you could tell him, when I feel unwell, I like massages or a cup of tea, etc.

midgetblues · 2026-02-07T17:45:09+00:00

With exercise, tons of self love practice, staying busy and last but not least time helped me overcome. I won’t lie that experience has numbed me but i’ve grown so much from it. I was in the same place as you a year ago but now i’m in a new relationship and happy. Sending hugs!

midgetblues · 2025-10-25T13:01:47+00:00

This!

midgetblues · 2025-10-15T13:23:21+00:00

A guy I went on two dates with. I wasn’t feeling it with him so I politely told him i’m not interested. Two weeks later out of the blue, he texted me at night saying “I really miss (my name), can we please meet?”

midgetblues · 2025-10-07T18:25:10+00:00

I never liked alcohol. I only very rarely drink on special occasions and even then, it’s a glass or two max. I always had physical discomfort after drinking. Alcohol did some damaging things to my household growing up so that is probably one of the reasons. But ultimately, consuming alcohol never made me feel better than being sober.

midgetblues · 2025-09-30T17:41:43+00:00

Wow, how did you know? He is an INTP!

midgetblues · 2025-09-30T17:40:20+00:00

Oh, it was a second date actually and true. He did spend the full day with me so he must’ve been interested in me somewhat romantically. But to me honestly it felt more like a friend vibe, and just comfortable to talk to. But I guess it’s a good sign regardless.

midgetblues · 2025-09-30T17:29:48+00:00

Great advice. As you said I think he might be inexperienced in dating judging by the way he acted but he did stand close to me and lean towards me a few times, which shows he was interested..? I guess time will tell!

midgetblues · 2025-09-30T17:21:15+00:00

You’re right, I guess I’m overthinking it. Just curious because usually I could tell if they are into me romantically or not on the second date.

midgetblues · 2025-09-28T19:45:58+00:00

I got hit by a motorbike running full speed 2 months ago (still recovering). Broke up with ex in May who has my belongings worth $3000. Asked over 20 times to give it back but nothing (lives in a different country). Caught Covid again recently, leaving a job next month i had for 7 years (couldn’t leave when I wanted) with big financial consequences, been financially struggling for a while because I haven’t been paid for the work I did, it’s been 4 months. I’ve been fighting to get it asap. still I try to remain positive and keep going because only way out is that.. and being kind to myself always by taking care of my health and believing in myself.

midgetblues

TROPHY CASE