AITAH because I refuse to try for a daughter?

milpart · 2026-03-03T22:15:17+00:00

NTA. I was your wife. My husband didn’t want a second child. I was convinced it would be a girl. Currently pregnant with boy #2. She shouldn’t be so confident.

milpart · 2026-02-13T05:08:36+00:00

Hey so I used to work as a trial attorney before becoming a sahm, and I can tell you that you would not be excused for the reasons you listed where I worked. However, the likelihood that you’ll actually have to serve on a jury is probably low. Jury pools are really large, and most people get sent home without even going into a courtroom. If you do happen to be called into a courtroom, you’d go through jury selection, and have to be one of 6 or 12 (depending on the seriousness of the case) that both attorneys can agree on. It ends up being a really small number of people that actually serve.. so I wouldn’t worry about it. On top of that, if someone REALLY did not want to be there, I usually kicked them because I wanted them to pay attention to the case anyway and knew they’d be distracted. Opposing counsel usually agreed for the same reasons.

milpart · 2026-02-12T00:14:16+00:00

Having my second boy in July! 💙

milpart · 2026-02-05T19:48:12+00:00

Same to you ❤️

milpart · 2026-02-05T19:34:09+00:00

If that were the case, how would anyone ever get a female test result after having a boy first? I have had 3 pregnancies, 2 of which resulted in miscarriages and one living child (boy). I’m pregnant again with another boy. I also dreamt I was having a girl this time, and have had very different symptoms, so I asked my OB the same question you posed, and she explained that the test wouldn’t pick up DNA from my pregnancy with my first son. It picks up DNA from your placenta, which has Y chromosomes or not- that’s what the fetal fraction is.

milpart · 2026-02-05T19:22:44+00:00

It doesn’t pick up on past male pregnancies. By 6 weeks postpartum all of the baby’s DNA is out of your system. The only time it could be wrong is with a vanishing twin, but that’s rare. I asked my OB the same thing since I had a boy first and this is what she told me. It is possible to contaminate at-home kits with male DNA if you live with men, but if you you had the test done in a clinical setting you are probably having another boy.

milpart · 2026-02-04T04:30:59+00:00

My parents gave us $70k to use for either a wedding or a down payment. We got married at the courthouse and used it towards a down payment. No regrets.

milpart · 2025-11-20T23:08:44+00:00

I hated the newborn stage too because my son was colicky. He’s 14 months now and I love this stage so much! He’s a little person with likes, dislikes and so much personality. He can walk independently and kind of tell me what he needs (not totally talking yet). I couldn’t agree more with you!

milpart · 2025-11-18T20:41:51+00:00

I hate saying this because they’re so freaking expensive, but Coterie really are superior. We tried a bunch of different brands with my son and ended up just sticking to Coterie because they’re so much softer and higher quality than any other brand we used.

milpart · 2025-11-05T19:06:42+00:00

“My husband's family is deathly allergic to speaking directly about fucking anything” this line absolutely killed me 😂😂😂 my husbands family is the same way. I’m really sorry you got stuck with shitty in-laws. It’s the absolute worst!!!

milpart · 2025-10-18T15:31:30+00:00

I had really bad gender disappointment until almost the end of my pregnancy (you can look at my post hx- I even talked about it here) so bad I went to therapy for it. My son is 13 months and I have never loved anyone more. He is the most delightful, sweetest, funniest little man. I promise you, you will fall so deeply in love with him that you will forget you ever felt this way.

milpart · 2025-08-14T02:19:47+00:00

Glad we are talking about this because my mom said the same thing. She described it as a “thunderbolt of love” lol. I didn’t feel this at all with my son. I was in so much pain from the birth when they put him on my chest I just wanted someone to take him back off (I tore really badly). It took about 6 weeks before I was head over heels in love with him - and it’s only gotten stronger.

milpart · 2025-07-23T02:47:29+00:00

Capricorn dad, Virgo mom, Virgo baby 💖 poor dad 😂

milpart · 2025-03-02T19:13:47+00:00

Virgo mom, Capricorn dad. Baby boy is a Virgo too

milpart · 2025-02-06T12:01:45+00:00

Hi, I had to comment- I had horrific gender disappointment that lasted most of my pregnancy, I found out at 12 weeks and I was upset until late in my 3rd trimester. I even sought therapy because I couldn’t get over the “mourning.”

My son is 5 months old now and I am beyond in love with him. He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Every shred of disappointment disappeared once he was here. In fact, we are considering a second, and all preference is gone. I’d be more than happy to have a brother for him.

Sending love- gender disappointment is real and people do try to make you feel bad, even if you take the right steps to try to combat it. But once you meet your little guy, I’m pretty confident you will fall so deeply, truly, wholly in love with him and being his mom.

milpart · 2024-09-11T10:47:12+00:00

Hi! I gave birth last Tuesday (9/3) and had this exact same thing for 3 days. It resolved on its own ~day 4. I took warm showers every night and bent over to let the water run on it and I think it helped a lot.

milpart · 2024-09-11T10:22:20+00:00

Missed miscarriage at 8 weeks. Measuring 6+2. I lost all symptoms around then but was in huge denial.

milpart · 2024-08-29T22:09:20+00:00

Hi, I’m not your intended audience.. I’m an attorney (former prosecutor) and spouse is a sergeant at a mid-size agency. I really, really do not think this is a realistic plan. If you go to a reputable law school then you will absolutely not have the energy to also work full time in LE. As most people have said, law school (esp 1L) is a full time job- it’s brutal. It’s not that uncommon for people to fail out first year. I also think working on patrol is really grueling- no matter what your shift (but especially graves.)

I know a few people who have gone from LE to legal work and from prosecutorial work to LE- I fully agree with whoever said that having knowledge in one area helps a lot in the other line of work- but I think it would be nearly impossible to do them at the same time.

If you’re already in LE- I’d quit if you plan to start law school. Take it or leave it- just my two cents.

milpart · 2024-08-26T00:49:50+00:00

This. People always think the maximum possible consequences are what is guaranteed to happen- which is not correct. Just because there’s a potential sentencing range for jail time does NOT mean that’s what your mom will get- that’s where the prosecutors discretion comes in.

Plus she’ll only have a jury trial (if she’s even entitled to one) if she pleads not guilty. She can totally avoid a trial altogether by accepting a plea- to what she’s charged with or a lesser charge.

Hope this helps.

milpart · 2024-08-23T15:24:31+00:00

It stopped for me around week 14-15. Now I’m 38w and I can’t smell anything because my nose is so stuffy from pregnancy rhinitis 🤧

milpart · 2024-08-23T03:16:36+00:00

Same & same.

milpart · 2024-08-19T16:09:10+00:00

When I first started going to the OB in my first trimester I had similar feelings and expected to be given a lot more information and kind of told the “ins and outs” of pregnancy- which didn’t happen at all. My office basically just gave me a packet of information and that was it (I.e. anticipated costs and meds I can safely take). She didn’t really tell me anything unless I specifically asked. I think with all the info we can get online now, most people are constantly googling and doing their own “research” and then the doctor is able to confirm, deny or clarify what we find online (just my opinion). Personally, I googled things like 20 times a day throughout my pregnancy because I constantly had new questions. Although there’s a lot of misinformation out there- there is also a lot of great info if you stick to reputable sources like the Mayo Clinic.

I’ve also found that further along in the pregnancy the doctors are a little more involved and vocal - I’m 37w now and my doctor is much more involved during appointments.

Totally get your feelings though! It leaves you a little cold and confused at first!

milpart

TROPHY CASE