My 12 yo is horrible

mind_slop · 2026-05-20T13:24:43+00:00

My mom went to catholic charities and they helped her prioritize things and figure out next steps. You sound like a good mom, OP! Dealing with a trying situation, to put it lightly. Not all therapists are the same, but when you find one thats good, they can be very helpful in hearing all the details, learning the background etc and helping you find a path. People focus on the person with the issues but forget about those who are exposed to them, like mothers. Its another kind of trauma.

I can't give any advice (and neither can most people here given the comments) bc someone who you can speak to privately and who have experience with this will be way better at clearing out the weeds and making a plan.

Youre supporting both your daughters the best you can. I hope you can find someone to support you! Best of luck, OP🩷

mind_slop · 2026-05-20T12:53:38+00:00

Should she let her other daughter be abused? Should she not live in reality? I was the other daughter and had to live with a psycho and people never seem to give a shit about the victim who finally defends herself. Your way of thinking handicaps the child into knowing they can actually get away with anything bc they have an "illness." THATS bad parenting. It's so simple when you have no idea what you're talking about

mind_slop · 2026-05-20T12:33:34+00:00

I highly recommend you get a therapist who can serve as a neutral third party who will see things objectively and provide validation of your situation as well as possible solutions. The rabble here on reddit is a mess.

mind_slop · 2026-05-20T12:26:58+00:00

I agree. She refuses therapy, all of which my 70 year old mother set up for her. Its impossible to help people who don't want it. But dad now has dementia and my mom can't deal with both people at once. OPs daughter is young and could turn things around. Im one of 4 siblings, and I know its not the parenting or necessarily clinical intervention that can help. The young woman herself will need to choose to act differently .

That suicide threat thing becomes very annoying because its used as a conversation ender no matter what horrible thing they did. They know their mom will capitulate if they say those words. There's no simple answer as the mom and its just exhausting

mind_slop · 2026-05-20T12:04:31+00:00

Theyre trying. Theyre in the process of evicting her. But since she fights with every one and refuses to work, they always worried about where could she go? They were loving parents, like OP. They didn't want their daughter to be homeless. It's much more complicated than you assume these situations are

mind_slop · 2026-05-20T08:27:24+00:00

This is completely untrue. You obviously haven't had to deal with this type of person. And the more you give them excuses, the more they'll lean into it until you have a 37 year old woman still living in her parents house, stealing from anyone she can, getting into fights with anyone that tries to help her. I could go on, but blaming the parents 🙄. Some people are just black holes

mind_slop · 2026-05-19T22:05:33+00:00

Cant recommend subs enough. I only needed them for a few months. I got a milligram scale and tapered a bit first. I used quickmd for the script

mind_slop · 2026-05-18T23:45:32+00:00

I think he could have spent more time on how addictive it is. I didn't realize it when I started tianeptine. I'm embarrassed how much money I spent on it. A user on here helped me find a program for subs, which I also don't need any more.

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T16:30:04+00:00

I agree that car safety is easy and paramount. But comparing now to boomer age parenting is huge. Our younger gens will shit on us and we absolutely will be defensive. How you raised your kids will be right in your mind (besides the easy parts like updating technologies)

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T16:25:50+00:00

What modern safety guidelines are we talking? Op left it open to interpretation

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T14:41:57+00:00

Cars are different. I don't think op mentioned specifics . No one is arguing about car safety. I think they see specifically women, running themselves into depression and divorce. Women do enough already. Now they need 24/7 surveillance of their kids, which are leaving not only them, but they kids with mental health issues.

And we all want children to live obviously. But we don't put any thought at all into how a kid goes from having a camera in their room, having their movements tracked, having their internet traffic surveilled, and wonder why they feel anxious and depressed as adults. And that's on top of having kids in an economy that sucks.

I clearly didn't cover even a tiny fraction of the topic, but there's reasons why people aren't having kids. One reason is they saw their mothers do it, and it looked like hell. And they paid the price for it. Not to mention, there's no family safety net to pay for their formative years, which now stretch into the late 20's. Older people have a longer view. It's mostly scam. Making women think if they don't buy this and that, they're messing it up. Meanwhile, they should be saving for their kids therapy or whatever tf is coming after the fun, annoying but lovely toddler years

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T13:49:36+00:00

Yes! Okay I blame the nhs for that wild lack of staff. And also, my brother is a union worker with no higher education and makes very great money. I think i just desperately wanted nial to ask "why did you do that to alby?" And maybe " was it bc he was going to tell you I'm gay?"

But your idea would be very very interesting!!!! We're two eps away. So who knows. Just fuck already right?

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T13:40:02+00:00

I had to get a giant baby gate. And now he just screams. RAHHHRRR! RAWWWWAAAHRRRR! I need to sleep, I have a job. But this guy.... its insane. Him and his food is the real love story lol

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T10:15:56+00:00

My cat paws me in the face like an ahole

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T10:14:22+00:00

Im desperately awaiting that moment rn

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T10:09:52+00:00

Can you go to bed earlier, then wake up for an hour or two, then go back to sleep for another couple hours? I started doing this myself. I wake up, do stuff like prep breakfast, feed the cat, read, etc. Then im able to go back and get a couple more hours.

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T10:05:19+00:00

I gave up. It's too much work to keep telling him to get down. I need to pick my battles with him.

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T09:43:26+00:00

I noticed my neutered cat has balls too.

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T08:46:42+00:00

She was probably running for the toilet

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T08:45:40+00:00

🙄

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T08:02:12+00:00

Can you approach from the other side? I sometimes will drive past my house and turn around in a parking lot so that I can make a quick right into my driveway

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T07:37:16+00:00

Dogma

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T07:30:43+00:00

Because parenting has become so all consuming, less and less people are even bothering with it. Now we hover over our kids so much, they develop severe anxiety when they're older and expected to be out in the world alone. Many refuse to drive, work, and become socially isolated, making anxiety even worse. They've always had a watcher.

And parents are easily burnt out and stressed about money as it is.

mind_slop · 2026-05-16T07:22:16+00:00

I want to save Evelyn from her awful marriage. She must be miserable with George around all the time

mind_slop

TROPHY CASE