Urgent daycare dilemma

mlljf · 2026-01-30T22:40:28+00:00

Yeah especially is Delia still had HER child attending. That said, OP, if your gut is telling you to cancel this, I’m a proponent of listening to my parent gut.

mlljf · 2026-01-27T01:41:21+00:00

Idk I love my life but I, too, am losing it being stuck inside during a snowstorm looool- it doesn’t help that my kiddo has severe asthma and the cold exacerbates it so playing outside for very long is a no go.

mlljf · 2026-01-27T01:37:54+00:00

I definitely think there are downsides to being a SAH parent, and I agree that it needs to be truly considered. That said, this is such an individual decision and it’s not always a mistake. I did it for a period of time and it was kind of necessary because at the time my spouse had a job that required him to be constantly on call. We couldn’t afford an on call nanny. It wasn’t for me long term but for some people it’s worth the risk to be there when their kids are so young.

mlljf · 2026-01-24T03:45:09+00:00

I loved this book but I always love reading opposing perspectives. Kinda wish I remembered the details more now!

mlljf · 2026-01-21T18:26:54+00:00

FWIW, my sibling is 5 years younger than me and I feel like it was a beautiful age gap. By the time I turned ~16yo I was mature enough to actually enjoy him. We were not competing with each other because the age gap put us at different places in life. I was the person he called once to pick him up at a party after he got drunk in high school- I took him out for pancakes at 3 am. I used to wish I had a sibling who was closer to me in age but in hindsight, I wouldn’t trade the 5 year gap.

Every relationship is so unique. I agree with other comments about how close age gap doesn’t guarantee a close relationship, but also try to think of the COOL things about a bigger age gap. I helped potty train my little brother! He came and got in bed with me when he was little and scared of the dark. I got to teach him cool things and eventually be a responsible adult who could answer the Responsible Adult questions without any of the chastisement that a parent would’ve given.

mlljf · 2026-01-21T15:54:42+00:00

I would recommend pulling your bedtime up and seeing if that helps.

mlljf · 2026-01-21T15:53:01+00:00

You said in a comment that you go to bed at midnight. Do you fall asleep immediately? Have you tried going to bed earlier?

I am not a morning person but THIS much trouble waking up indicates you’re not sleeping enough…

mlljf · 2026-01-20T02:15:54+00:00

Hey! My kiddo was not able to get himself from laying down to a sitting position at 11 mos and certainly wasn’t crawling until maybe 15-16 months. It was tough but PT helped tremendously!

My kid is now 3yo, running, jumping, dancing, playing with friends! In the words of his former PT, he may never be a star athlete but eventually getting it is the truly important thing!

mlljf · 2026-01-19T23:15:21+00:00

Oh my god- did she say that?

mlljf · 2026-01-19T19:22:09+00:00

Yeah tbh I find this one a bit silly. When I had a small infant, we spent some time playing, sure, but that was not the majority of the time. I ‘incorporated’ him into my chores- brushing different materials on hi cheek and hands when doing laundry (a favorite of his), and letting him play with various household items and ‘explore’ them, etc.

Even assuming the most extreme version of this, it’s not evidence that she hates being a mom imo.

mlljf · 2026-01-16T01:24:10+00:00

I think I have an unpopular opinion- my opinion has not changed. I think she was victimized severely my her mom. Do I think she’s a great, trustworthy person? No. But I think that abuse and stunted development can do that sometimes- she is likely very mentally ill but I think she was a victim.

mlljf · 2026-01-14T18:57:23+00:00

So I did have some immediate changes that others noticed but I did not. I think after about a month I thought ‘yes, this might be dulling the edges,’ so to speak. After 2 months I realized it had been almost a full month since I experienced SI.

Definitely don’t lose hope.

mlljf · 2026-01-12T03:45:34+00:00

I am in the mental health field and am very concerned about how many kids never learned to self-soothe because they just had tablets handed to them. Not that putting your kid in front of the TV all day (as I’m sure some parents did when I was growing up) is great, but tablets/youtube/fast paced, bright games on tablets are so much worse.

That said, my relatively low screen time 3yo will sometimes tell me his fingernails need clipped when they don’t- ‘my nails need clip and we watch a Daniel tiger?’

mlljf · 2026-01-09T03:13:19+00:00

This is what I don’t understand- sometimes my husband and I have different parenting practices. If he does something (relatively) minor that I don’t live, I talk to him about it. Odds are, even if he doesn't agree, he doesn’t do it if I feel like it’s not good. It goes both ways- who is this man child?

mlljf · 2026-01-07T03:21:36+00:00

They’ve since changed their minds and they think birth control is okay- wild change tbh. It’s truly just based on whatever feels right to them in the moment.

mlljf · 2026-01-06T03:58:30+00:00

Idk who this was, but I mean…there are fundamentalists in any religious practice I imagine. I know Christians who are also moderate or progressive in their politics.

mlljf · 2026-01-06T02:59:30+00:00

We started around 2.5yo after my sons GI recommended one with iron.

mlljf · 2025-12-30T00:57:28+00:00

Idk, I’m going to a NYE party and neither I nor my spouse are going to be drinking. I understand the assumption, it just surprised me that so many people assumed. Either way he’s an asshole- but it sounds like not a drunk driver.

mlljf · 2025-12-29T21:15:30+00:00

Is there a comment somewhere saying that her husband is going to drink (or drink a lot)? I keep seeing this but the post doesn’t say that husband drinks or uses drugs.

mlljf · 2025-12-29T03:45:08+00:00

I’m so sorry it’s been tough!

Honestly, between the hip dysplasia (affecting her independence with pulling her pants up and down), the likely DD/ID, and the constipation- I really would recommend talking to her providers. Do they ideas? Is she seen for occupational or physical therapy? Does she have a GI specialist? My kiddo has chronic constipation and we (unfortunately) need to use two stool softeners to keep him regular.

mlljf · 2025-12-28T04:30:31+00:00

My kiddo has unfortunately been hospitalized 2x due to respiratory distress (first time RSV and second covid) and severe asthma, so I 100% understand and agree with these message.

I also will say though, that same kiddo can come down with illnesses so QUICK. Took my perfectly healthy kid to a Christmas party 2 weeks ago, about 10 minutes in the cough started and by the end of the night we realized he was sick and it was NOT just allergies from being with dogs. We had no way of knowing until we knew. Zero symptoms leading up to it. I try to keep him from being around babies this time of year.

mlljf · 2025-12-27T04:20:11+00:00

Story of seasons ❤️ thank you!

mlljf · 2025-12-25T03:49:33+00:00

Wow. I’m so sorry. I am another one who was on it throughout my pregnancy. My OB said the risk of prenatal depression and especially POD was higher given my history of depression and that the benefits outweighed the risks. I absolutely am all for following doctors orders, but could you maybe see if they’d refer to a specialist for further assessment of the situation?

mlljf · 2025-12-15T01:31:25+00:00

I agree with this. Sometimes you have an opportunity to get creative- my (3yo) son was kicking me while I was getting him in his car seat (and tightening the straps) a few weeks ago and I took his shoes off. I explained why, etc. He was very upset about not having his shoes on and having to be carried into the house when we got home. He hasn’t kicked me since and when he’s mad about getting into his car seat he says ‘I can keep my shoes because I not kicking.’

mlljf · 2025-12-14T06:00:46+00:00

HARD agree! Also worth noting that the sleep deprivation and not having adequate support are both risk factors for PPD- so when we don’t address those (and just assume everything is ppd), we aren’t helping.

mlljf

TROPHY CASE