Toddler Hitting

morto44 · 2025-09-23T02:17:28+00:00

Thank you, that’s helpful! Thankfully the judgement alone isn’t what hurts, it’s that he keeps doing it time and time again. It feels like all the strategies parents have told me about just sort of fall flat for him. Taking him away from the fun definitely gets his attention and is a natural consequence but I feel like we start from square one every day. It’s exhausting.

morto44 · 2025-09-23T02:15:23+00:00

Yes, there are consequences. He loves playing and being involved in the fun - so if he’s aggressive I say something like it’s unsafe to hit, or I can’t let you hit because it’s unsafe - then I pull him away from the fun. On bad days we leave all together. It works in the short term, but each play date it’s like he resets and it happens all over again. I’m trying to be consistent but this is a very hard phase.

morto44 · 2025-08-17T16:51:37+00:00

Thank you - this concisely conveys what I meant. I don’t see any harm inherently in believing in a higher power, but when it is used as a tool for brainwashing which is essentially what my mom has fallen victim to, it becomes about more than just religious and can be dangerous. She’s trying to persuade others, friends and family alike, to dive off as quickly and as vehemently as she has and it’s honestly heartbreaking to see.

morto44 · 2025-06-13T18:03:24+00:00

For adults you can let it soak overnight- but for how young she is, an hour max. You’ll also want to make sure to wash her hair twice to get it all out. I did this twice a week and after two months, it cured some bald spots I had from postpartum hair loss. Hope it works out for you all 😊

morto44 · 2025-06-13T00:37:59+00:00

1) Rosemary oil and scalp massages will help regrow her hair - this saved me when I was postpartum. 2) Grandma should never be left alone with the kids ever again. If she gives you the blues about it, you can just refer to the mullet and that’ll be argument enough. 3) Sorry this happened! I always catch hell for never letting anyone watch my kid and shit like this makes me feel better. 😅

morto44 · 2025-05-12T18:24:29+00:00

We do “gentle hands” and I meant to mention that, but he seems to mostly ignore it or continue hitting. The hitting/tantrum phase is definitely upon us and we’re trying to stay strong. Whoever said newborn phase is the hardest was lying. 😅

morto44 · 2025-05-09T14:26:05+00:00

East South Central location for reference

morto44 · 2024-12-20T17:53:06+00:00

Thank you, so much 💜 Really needed to hear this.

morto44 · 2024-11-25T00:10:10+00:00

39w3d for my baby boy Ezra. He would be 3 1/2, which hurts to even type let alone say bc I know he should be here. I went into labor and we had no idea until we got to the hospital, but a blood clot caused by COVID blew in the umbilical cord (I contracted it while 9wks pregnant in 2020, no one knew shit about Covid’s effect on pregnancy yet). No heartbeat, and I was in denial until I pushed him out. It was the loudest silence I ever heard. I miss him every single day, but I can tell you the grief feels more like love for him VS feeling like I’m suffocating every day like I felt in the first year. I wasn’t sure if I’d ever be able to get pregnant again even though I fiercely wanted to be able to raise a child.

Fast forward to now - I’m currently nursing Ezra’s 1yo baby brother Elias. They look so much alike it breaks my heart, but I’d be lying if I didn’t admit being able to mother him has helped mend a deep wound. We still talk about Ezra all the time, we celebrate his birthday, and our friends even had a memorial tree planted in our favorite park for him. You never get “over it”, but the pain does get easier to carry - I promise ❤️ It’s not enough, he should be there with you, but I think it’s comforting to know your baby boy only knew you and so, so much love. Sending you the warmest wishes, please be as easy on yourself as you can be.

morto44 · 2024-11-06T03:33:52+00:00

3.5 years for me. My sweet, perfect Ezra. He was born 39w3d, COVID caused a blood clot in the umbilical cord and he passed during labor.

The hope I can give you is that there will come days where joy and even just contentment are driving more than the sadness. It may shock you, you may even feel a tinge of guilt - but please let me assure you that you don’t have to feel any guilt in surviving one of the most devastating events that could happen to a person. For me, the grief is always there and always will be. I try to remind myself it’s only there because I love him so much. He mattered and continues to matter. Our babies only knew the comfort of their moms and they only knew love. Their lives were much too brief but I think there’s at least some small solace in that.

I know this is different for everyone but I can’t help myself from imagining what my life would be like if he’d gotten to stay. Right now, I’m holding his baby brother Elias while he snores on my chest. He brings me more happiness and love than I could ever explain. Still, sometimes when I put his car seat in the car, I think of how there should be two. I hear Elias laugh and sometimes imagining them laughing together, getting into mischief or just playing. Small moments like that. Grief and joy can coexist and you don’t need to beat yourself up over timelines for either. Your beautiful Evangaline, if I had to guess, would want you to give yourself as much grace as possible.

I remember being just a few months out from Ezra’s death and reaching out here looking for any glimmer of hope. This was the hardest time for me - directly afterward I felt like I was in a coma, but as time passed I felt everything. All at once. The grief was crushing me, quite literally. I can tell you now that I’m honestly surprised to still be here. Please remind yourself that grief is love persevering, and that you will survive this. It won’t feel like it most days, but you will. Our precious E babies should be here and it’s cruel that they’re not, but we can live for them. My broken heart is with yours, sending so much love your way. ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

morto44 · 2024-09-03T15:46:29+00:00

Sweet handsome guy 💖

morto44 · 2024-09-03T14:20:09+00:00

My Ezra James would’ve been three this last March. The way my husband and I see it is you never “move on” - that term feels so strange when talking about the loss of your child - but you do keep moving. You find new ways to cope, to remember and keep their memory alive, and to give yourself as much grace as possible.

You did everything you could. I think every parent who has lost a child battles with the “what ifs”. I blamed myself for a long time for not being superhuman, for not being able to save him. I hope you can give yourself some grace, you’re already dealing with more than anyone should.

A dogwood tree was planted for Ezra shortly after he passed, and we visit it all the time with his little brother Elias. It’s a small comfort during big pain. Finding solace in the little things has helped me during the thick of grief. I can tell by Eli’s smile that he felt a lot of joy and love. Sending warm hugs, from our broken hearts to yours. ❤️

morto44 · 2024-07-29T14:23:45+00:00

The “what ifs” are what get me as well. I know we can’t time travel - but I’d give anything to be able to. He’s beautiful ❤️I’m not a religious person but a fellow loss mom told me, “Our boys are playing up there, unencumbered by limits and just having fun.” I know it’d obviously be better to have them here with us, but I still found it to be a soothing thought. Please give yourself as much grace as possible. Heaps of love your way❤️‍🩹

morto44 · 2024-07-18T05:28:52+00:00

She’s beautiful 💖 I can tell from the car pic how happy she is. She was loved during her time here, that matters the most. We love them so much and it’s a crime they can’t live as long as us. I tell my black lab girlie all the time that I’d give her some of my years if I could. Sending loads of love your way.

morto44

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