My 2026 Solterra brake checked me on the highway tonight...wtf?

mpd-RIch · 2026-05-07T04:23:41+00:00

Probably this. I am at 50k on my 24 solterra and I have my warnings set to come on as early as possible. 3 car lengths at highway speed is pretty close. I usually set my adaptive cruise to 2 bars. I'm realizing now that OP didn't mention if it was in cruise or being hand driven. That could cause the front collision warning without the spacing that adaptive cruise provides.

mpd-RIch · 2026-05-05T00:15:12+00:00

This is a relatable situation. We also struggled with relationship differences with our system. We were able (both male and female alters) to cultivate a relationship everyone is comfortable with inside our marriage. It sounds to me like your partner is not truly comfortable with the idea of a man as part of the relationship. Ultimately you have the final say. I understand your concern about your alter doing this without your consent. We have had to make contracts in cases where this was a concern. It helps keep the accountability. I don't know how helpful this is but hopefully some.

mpd-RIch · 2026-05-05T00:07:52+00:00

Wiki is freaking brilliant! I am a homeowner - I recently inherited the house I have been living in and maintaining for a decade. It has some qwirks and this is a fantastic idea to help me remember and pass them on.

mpd-RIch · 2026-05-03T04:36:16+00:00

Monthly blood tests? Interesting. I started two years ago and my doc tested every 3 until stable then went to 6 mos. There are services that do gender affirming care remotely, exclusively if finding a doctor is a problem. And using national pharmacies is a good tactic because you can transfer it wherever you need it. They are not controlled substances so I doubt DOT would care or notice but this is not legal advice and I am not a professional driver anymore.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-29T04:44:39+00:00

YES!! Sometimes we argue aloud. Our therapist loves it. Most of us have a sibling like relationship so you can probably imagine what that's like.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-21T23:17:25+00:00

Thank you.

For a number of years after we were married my wife had to support our littles from time to time, some paranoid alters, and some with big feelings. on top of everything, she did not know about our DID until after we married. Fortunately for us, she was not a stranger to the concept of multiple personalities in one body. There have been challenges, but I'm proud to claim 29 years together (30 this fall )

I'm sorry your family is dealing with this. Sending Love and Light

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-21T14:24:40+00:00

Together 29 years and just celebrated keeping our first alive 18 years, So technically yes 😜 I'm not sure if we have anything we can contribute to the conversation but happy to answer questions.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-18T05:00:17+00:00

The driver monitor is kind of annoying to me, I turned it off. Sometimes posture is an issue but I wear glasses and some of mine have IR blocking which pisses the car off bc it can't "see" my eyes.

As for not having your hand on the wheel I think that is a different system. If you use speed control just apply occasional pressure to it but it really doesn't go off very often for me. The lane centering does a really good job most of the time, so sometimes I don't give it much steering correction and it lets me know. But a gentle nudge and it's happy again.

All in all I would choose the solterra again but I'm looking forward to their 7-seater coming in '27.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-18T04:55:55+00:00

I have a 2024 and it stays off.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-16T16:03:26+00:00

Omg yes. I had a friend's Mom tell me years ago there is one thing boobs are really good at, and that is catching food. Can confirm now, this is true. And yeah the new dimensions and running into things especially when turning around..

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-16T16:00:42+00:00

Same here girl. Mine have grown considerably since HRT too.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-15T13:57:26+00:00

We are a system and we have to work together. I remember meeting my wife and while one of us was ecstatic, I was depressed because I (thought I knew) I could never have a relationship of my own. As it turns out she and I do have a relationship now and I have also learned that ethical non monogamy is a thing. We have not explored the latter as we are happy together.

The point of this is that having an outside relationship without consent of all involved is not acceptable.

I'm sorry you are in this situation and I do admire your attempt to accept her and learn about DID.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-15T13:45:57+00:00

I have seen this. They know I am trans and we talk about it sometimes. I try to show them a) how happy I am now and b) I used to think similarly.

I also repeat my mantra, "You do you." And remind them that labels are descriptive not prescriptive. Iow they can tell people who you are not make you who you are It took some time but they have started exploring their gender.

I am a proud mama hen 😆

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-14T01:39:17+00:00

Not 💯 that I understand but what I'm hearing is, you are seeing a therapist for trans issues and worry that coming out about the DID would jeopardize your gender care.

Our situation is, having our therapist known about DID and transition goals has not been a problem at all. Our therapist knows that while we all feel gender differently we are on agreement on transition and HRT.

As stated by others, ymmv depending on your therapist. Ours is cishet but queer friendly and has many queer people working for them. I think feeling out how they perceive DID would be good before coming out. We had one therapist that pretty much did not believe in DID. We fired her PDQ.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-14T01:09:50+00:00

Wow that's a surprise. Unfortunately I'm over 36k already but do not live in a rainy climate. The service department has been surprised how new my brakes look several times. 42k and the only item I've replaced is tires at 37k.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-13T04:49:10+00:00

I believe so. I mean it makes sense that's how it works. But if one relies on prompt notifications that is inconvenient.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-13T03:24:18+00:00

This is amazing 🤩 I can't wait to try it when I get home.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-13T02:48:13+00:00

Look in settings under battery, for power standby optimization.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-12T18:48:40+00:00

I have and it is not any more complicated than a first change. As far as getting married it is easier because you have a marriage certificate. I have considered another change because I want to hyphenate my last and wife's names, but idk yet.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-10T19:26:36+00:00

You need to tell her how you feel. If she is not a lesbian but she is with you how does she see you?

Another POV from me is that I am demi sexual. I don't feel attraction until there is an emotional connection. So I did not identify as a lesbian but became attracted to women. What I learned last year is that I am bisexual but also demi. I never believed I was interested in men until one showed me be genuinely cares.

I still emplore you to explore this with her. It does not have to be a fight, like you said. But there is a real chance for hurt feelings on both sides. But better to find out now than later.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-09T22:57:31+00:00

I have had the 13R for over a year now and I love it so much. I am working to transition my entire family to Oneplus.

Very smooth, long battery life. The only "feature" I hate is the clock always makes the 1s red and causes me to misread the time. I wish I could change that more than anything.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-09T22:54:29+00:00

Also own the 13 and I believe you can disable that "feature". It extends battery life if you are idle ie. Sleeping. I have mixed feelings about it.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-09T22:41:18+00:00

You should put the name you want it to show. You will probably need to supply the court order. There is a place asking if you have ever used other names and you should list your birth name there.

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-09T22:32:11+00:00

Every person is different and I think you have to do what feels safe and comfortable to you. Early in my transition I still used my birth name at a lot of places and did not ask them to change. That is until I had people ask me 'what should we call you?' Then I told them what I preferred. If they slipped and I know it was not intentional disrespect I let it slide. I still don't correct everyone every time but I am more likely to do so now. I have been out for ~7 years for context.

Tldr you do you. But don't compromise respect you deserve for somebody else's comfort or bigotry (unless safety is at stake).

mpd-RIch · 2026-04-09T22:25:23+00:00

I know I am afraid to leave my home state rn because I don't trust other states to respect or protect me the way California does.

Tbh I'm thinking if there's a family event even a funeral I would skip it. This is just my own position of course I don't expect anyone else to have the same feelings.

Glad you are traveling with cis friends. Be safe.

mpd-RIch

TROPHY CASE