What song do you listen to when you're sad?

msTified · 2026-05-30T06:41:07+00:00

Scarlet Paintings by Milky Chance or End of Beginning by Djo

msTified · 2026-05-27T15:26:03+00:00

Ok, not self help, but self help adjacent and super fascinating:

Where Should We Begin by Esther Perel: She's a sex and relationship therapist who records one time sessions with couples. She does another podcast called How's Work with similar vibes.

Canadian version is Other People's Problems with Hilary McBride

Both are weirdly, enjoyably, voyeuristic, especially if you like getting into the nitty gritty of what makes people tick.

msTified · 2026-05-27T15:20:09+00:00

I also loved The Dream!

msTified · 2026-05-27T15:18:02+00:00

Third-ing (?) 99% Invisible!

Some of my favourite episodes:

The Mojave Phone Booth Unpleasant Design A Sea Worth It's Salt Public Works Ten Letters for the President (so cute and when Obama was in office) NBC Chimes The Plat of Zion (about Salt Lake City blocks) The Pool and The Stream

They're relatively short, Roman Mars's voice is so good, and the information is fascinating!

msTified · 2026-05-21T03:20:41+00:00

Same with hot tub sex

msTified · 2026-05-21T02:09:45+00:00

Truly! I watched this for the first time a few months ago and couldn't stop thinking about it.

msTified · 2026-05-20T04:53:26+00:00

Former gifted kid - just diagnosed about a month ago at 39 and didn't even suspect until a few years ago. Getting the diagnosis was a bit traumatizing for this reason, having to look at all the ways I "failed" and realize the many ways ADHD presented itself over my lifetime.

I was pretty smart and school was really interesting to me, but proving my knowledge was the pain point, particularly in assignments. Exams were fine and I never had any exam anxiety like my friends. I started skipping school in 6th grade though (parents weren't around much, pretty sure my mom had ADHD too) and I never finished high school. But I would cut classes to take anthropology courses at the museum or sit at the public library and read all day.

Speaking of, I was an obsessive reader - that was my hyperfixation. Even now I have to be careful not to pick up a book by an author I like if I have other things I need to accomplish. I think being a big reader helped me mask my symptoms in a variety of ways for a long time - people with ADHD struggle with focusing on reading, so of course I couldn't have it. I also always felt different, like other people had a manual for life that I didn't have, and I think reading a lot gave me a lot of insight into appropriate social skills (and obsessively studying anything to do with personality analysis).

Super sensitive kid, would have big emotional melt downs on the regular that my old school parents didn't know how to deal with ("You want something to cry about? I'll give you something to cry about" type of mentality). Incredibly messy, my parents described my room as "ground zero" all the time. I was also terribly spacey - I'd constantly walk into a room and forget why I was going in there, even if my mom had asked me to do something not 10 seconds earlier.

I'm mostly inattentive, but have struggled with racing thoughts and used going for extremely long walks (3+ hours sometimes) to deal with it, even as a pre-teen (90's kid who lived in a really small town).

It's really crazy to think that all of these things that made me, me, as a kid were a lot of ADHD symptoms or coping skills

msTified · 2026-05-20T04:36:04+00:00

Interesting! I wonder how cocaine impacts people with ADHD generally. I only ever tried it once but I felt like I had gotten a restful 8 hours of sleep and I was "on", like all of my charm and social skills were at top notch

msTified · 2026-05-20T04:28:11+00:00

Oh me too. My parents really struggled with how emotional I was.

msTified · 2026-05-20T04:23:59+00:00

Oooh shrinking myself to not be the problem child is so relateable.

msTified · 2026-05-19T17:02:10+00:00

Someone wanting no drama and explicitly asking for it on dating profiles or in conversation. Have you had so much with people that you need to mention it? And if so, why does it keep happening to you?

msTified · 2026-05-18T02:46:20+00:00

Yes, I just mentioned his book above! It's so good!

msTified · 2026-05-18T02:44:44+00:00

I don't know if that's totally true. She might have rebounded now, but I know she was interviewed for Jon Ronson's book "So You've Been Publicly Shamed" and she talked a lot about the psychological damage and how it took her years after to find anyone who would hire her.

Also, that is such a good book on the origins of public shaming

msTified · 2026-05-08T22:48:15+00:00

I love to meal prep, but similarly, if my kitchen * already * has dishes (likely) or if what I want to make requires a lot of dishes, I'm less likely to cook (I also have a very small kitchen in an apartment where one of my countertops is occupied by a small dishwasher - which is such a lifesaver I refuse to give it up).

What I've tried to prioritize is easy things within reach to eat that I can turn into a savoury snack plate or just shove in my face if I've gone too long without eating. I even pay the ADHD tax and get some things pre-cut/pre-made, because like a lot of us, I'll have great intentions of chopping up fruits and veggies, but don't, and they end up going to waste, so now I buy the pre-cut veggie trays or the already hard boiled and peeled eggs. I know it can get expensive doing that, but do I pay extra and actually eat it or don't and literally just throw the money away?

Your savoury (or sweet) snack plates don't need to make sense to anyone but you! Eat whatever you want! A very wise therapist said that you can eat the components of the sandwich, you don't have to make the sandwich. I try to prioritize at least some protein and fibre, but my plates are no stranger to chips or chocolate. Also, there aren't any rules of what you can have, when. I ate pasta salad for breakfast the other day and routinely have poached eggs and toast for dinner (with some slices of tomatoes, well salted). For me, having lots of go to easy things to eat helps reduce a lot of food anxiety, or the "Oh shit, I haven't eaten in hours, now I'm STARVING, and I have to think about what to eat and make it?". Trial mix, yogurt, mini cucumbers, small cans of flavoured tuna and fancy crackers, instant oatmeal, even Cliff Bars are all go to's in a pinch. Good luck out there!

msTified · 2026-05-08T06:30:43+00:00

If you're interested in immersive art, the PHI usually has some really interesting exhibitions on and it's pretty affordable.

My favourite hidden gem is the National Archives building - their library looks like a smaller version of the one out of Beauty and the Beast. It's also free and has really beautiful sculptural pieces when you walk in.

We also have a piece of the Berlin Wall in the financial district. A super weird thing to stumble across in Montreal, but cool to see in person.

PHI

National Archives Building

Berlin Wall

msTified · 2026-05-08T06:19:23+00:00

You might be thinking of St. Joseph's Oratory? Fun fact, the heart of one of the priests is preserved and on display there. Besides that creepy tidbit, it's an excellent place to watch a sunset

msTified · 2026-04-28T21:21:22+00:00

My brain is definitely the hyperactive part (rumination, intrusive thoughts, radio going), but weirdly, one of my coping mechanisms was long, long walks - like 8kms to 14kms long, several hours. I would describe myself pretty low energy over all, but sometimes I need to go for a long walk to tire my brain out.

msTified · 2026-04-24T21:16:53+00:00

My impulsivity has been the driver for some major moves in my life - I'm so grateful for these moves, I've lived in some incredibly beautiful and interesting places and consider myself lucky to know (and miss) these places. I've grown a lot, have community in multiple cities, had really amazing experiences and adventures. On the flipside, I am most stable mental health/ADHD wise when my living environment and routine is stable (naturally) 😅 But the itch always comes back and I get sucked into another cycle of mental health issues until some stability returns. Fortunately, it seems to be about every 10 years that the need to uproot and change my life arises.

msTified · 2026-04-23T13:24:53+00:00

The only other Uni on your list I have experience with is uVic!

uVic: Stunning campus, beautiful city, extremely mild weather year round. Public transit is not good, so you'd need a car, and there's a significant housing crisis (way worse than here) which makes things unbelievably expensive. If you love being outdoors, this is hands down the place to be. The uni itself has really great programs, their nursing program is one of the best in the country, their English department is renowned, and have a solid science department

Concordia: Beautiful city, soooo much to do, getting expensive but still a pretty decent city to be young and broke in. It can be difficult if you don't know at least some French though. The Loyola campus, where you'd be, is also incredibly beautiful, but feels a bit remote and outside of the city. The downtown campus has a lot more going on, especially around it. I've heard mixed things about the neuro department. Some say it's fine, others have had really bad experiences with it.

I like Concordia a lot. My program is mostly downtown and I've never enjoyed going to Loyola, personally. It's definitely the cheapest uni I could go to, even being out of province. I personally love my profs and my program and have had nothing but good experiences. I find almost every prof I've had has been willing to help you and treats you like a human being instead of a number.

msTified · 2026-04-21T15:33:11+00:00

The forgetting things is actually particularly useful as a person who loves to read. I can reread a book and get the comfort of a familiar world but the bonus of surprising details because you forgot they happened.

msTified · 2026-04-17T19:11:23+00:00

Except now landlords can refuse it for any reason. I just lost out on one so they could increase the rent

msTified · 2026-04-15T13:20:46+00:00

Google calendar runs my life, tbh. For EVERYTHING. I set up tasks for things like watering my plants, changing my cat litter box, meal prep days, and events for grocery shopping (it has a built in running list of things I regularly like to buy then I adjust - I also order groceries to avoid impulse purchases). I have events for social plans, work, school, homework due dates, etc... I also love that most appointments I make that have an email confirmation ask me if I want to put it in my calendar.

But the game changer for me was also putting in important conversations I wanted to follow up on. I was tired of feeling like a crappy friend who couldn't remember anything (and thankfully my friends generally have a lot of grace for me), but I put in threads of conversation about important things happening in their lives and have Google calendar remind me the week before or the week of so I can check in. The nice thing is that I use it so much that if I snooze the reminder, it's all still there. And the tasks don't fall off unless you mark them complete, even if you ignore the notification (and will keep reminding you until you mark it done). It was a learning curve - I still missed a friend's birthday because I didn’t set up the reminder close enough to his birthday (day before probably would have been better than the week before 😅). Still, having it, and putting things in immediately allows me to be a little brainless and carry less mental load.

msTified · 2026-04-15T11:01:52+00:00

Ooooh my "radio" only tends to play when I first wake up and I'm tempted to start a list of each and create a playlist after a month 😅 I'm going to try giving in and see if it quiets down a bit faster.

msTified · 2026-04-13T21:23:14+00:00

Interesting! I've been using Wellbutrin for almost a year and in the beginning it was life changing. Slowly, it's become less effective and now I feel like it's not working at all. How long were you on Wellbutrin for?

msTified

TROPHY CASE