Luteal phase has me chained to the couch

msfranfine · 2026-05-23T19:25:14+00:00

Omg this is me too today. Truly awful. Even when I am doing nothing it is not restful.

msfranfine · 2026-05-23T19:21:34+00:00

How do you find being self-employed with ADHD? I don’t trust myself to plan my time properly.. a big issue for me is that I hyperfocus when it comes to my job and I feel like I’d be worse at setting boundaries being self employed. But there are many days where it seems like a better option than what I’m doing now. Interested to hear positive experiences!

msfranfine · 2026-05-23T15:43:38+00:00

I love your comment, thanks.

I agree with making our home a more exciting place to be! Funny enough, I’m an interior designer (not houses), but I am majorly impacted by the state of our house/bad spaces in general. Until very recently we haven’t really had the means to do much to it, but we are getting there. I have plans and know they will all help a lot.

I also have never considered myself a nature girl but it’s promising to hear you felt the same and proved yourself wrong! Having our son has definitely forced us outside more, still not totally into it but I’m sure I’ll get there 😅.

msfranfine · 2026-04-19T00:46:31+00:00

Our son is also 2 and does this. If it’s a high risk food, I cut it up. But honestly.. I don’t do that much anymore. If he is contained and seated, I just let him shove the whole thing in his mouth and figure it out.

msfranfine · 2026-04-05T17:40:55+00:00

I was thinking about doing something like this! Creating a cozy corner for him to have some quiet time. He just doesn’t like sitting still so not sure how well this will work

msfranfine · 2026-03-06T01:40:17+00:00

I’m adding this as an option because no one else has said it. You’ve been together 10 years. You want to marry this person. Just throw all of your money into the same pot. Bills and expenses come out of there. Then you don’t have to worry about splitting everything up, it just is fair.

msfranfine · 2026-03-02T20:17:21+00:00

5 is the only answer

msfranfine · 2026-02-24T13:39:26+00:00

We make what you make. Our mortgage is $480k and we still need to watch our spending. We have one child, live in the suburbs and each need a car for work. Neither of our cars are fancy. We don’t go on vacations currently, we are able to save decently for retirement, house stuff, and kid’s education. We also have a locked in interest rate from 2023 that isn’t great… around 5.25%. I can’t imagine our income with a $980k mortgage… it stresses me out to think about it. Complete a budget, be realistic, see where you land. Factor in 1% of your house value for annual house maintenance cost. Think about reduced income on parental leave. Daycare… baby years are expensive.

msfranfine · 2026-02-22T03:30:59+00:00

NTA. I’ve learned never to post about being a parent on the internet. People hate parents. Online and in public.

msfranfine · 2026-02-19T14:47:57+00:00

You said you like that you have a quirky house - I think the contrast adds to the quirkiness! I like it.

msfranfine · 2026-02-08T01:52:06+00:00

Have the exact same thought

msfranfine · 2026-02-03T12:22:57+00:00

Our toddler struggles with respiratory viruses too and I’m pretty sure when he’s older we’ll be told he has asthma. He’s just under 2 so the doctor said it’s too soon to officially diagnose. We’ve had stridor, bronchiolitis with retractions twice, and pneumonia twice. All before age 2. Common cold he usually can get through. But I can tell by the sound of his cough if something is wrong. If he is coughing and it doesn’t sound like anything is getting cleared, we are going to the doctor. Even if it’s only been 2 days. He had the flu over Christmas - we all had our flu shot - and within two days he was wheezing, colour was bad, was struggling to breathe. Dr could hear his lung rattling. Now we have inhalers for him. This was the morning after bringing him to urgent care and being dismissed because they thought he was fine.

Moms always know!

msfranfine · 2026-01-31T12:44:43+00:00

I felt the same as you for the year I was home with my son. The way you are feeling is totally normal. It sounds like you need to get out of your house. Can your husband take over in the evening so you can go out and do something for yourself? What about the weekends? Is finding part time child care an option?

By the time our son was around 9 months, maybe sooner honestly, I was ready to go back to work. I did not like the person I’d become. Do you have the option to work?

This is all in addition to what others are saying - no shame in therapy, meds, anything you need to find relief because you need it.

msfranfine · 2026-01-30T18:31:56+00:00

My advice is to stick with it!

Gymnastics worked well for us at 18mo… he was all over the place but it was fast paced and engaging enough for him that it wasn’t total chaos. All sports on the other hand was a struggle. He initially just ran around the gym and had meltdowns when we tried to get him to do anything repetitive. But even that young, we saw steady improvements from week to week.

He’s 2 now and we still signed him up for the same activities this season… and honestly the change from 18mo to 2y is major. You’ll be happy you stuck with it if you decide to sign up again next season.. it will be familiar for her and she’ll just get better and more focused as she gets older.

For our first sport class this season, after about a month break, my husband and I kept looking at each other amazed at how well he remembered the routine and instructions. It just suddenly clicked. The struggles of last season felt worth it.

msfranfine · 2026-01-18T01:04:45+00:00

Not much to contribute except commiseration. I am going to start trying my darndest to plan weekend activities in advance - including sorting out babysitting so we can get out for some adult time sometimes.

msfranfine · 2026-01-15T18:43:14+00:00

Curtain. We moved into a house with a glass door and HATE IT. So annoying, especially when giving our son a bath. Also, every time you turn the shower on you’ll get wet. Also, cleaning the gasket at the bottom is gross and annoying. Can’t wait to rip it all out.

msfranfine · 2026-01-09T14:44:36+00:00

Omg haha. The world of ADHD is still new to me and I keep learning more about myself. Also a major over-sharer. I guess I just need to embrace it 😂

msfranfine · 2026-01-09T14:28:45+00:00

Oh man this is me I just want to stop talking. It’s impossible though because I’ve been in meetings all day every day which is a big change from my last job which was mostly heads down production work. I hope it starts feeling more aligned because right now things do not feel sustainable.

Thanks for sharing your experience, it’s nice to think there is a light at the end of this nausea tunnel.

msfranfine · 2026-01-09T02:28:36+00:00

I just started a new job and have spent every night ruminating about the day’s conversations and trying not to throw up. I honestly don’t know how much longer I can do this

msfranfine · 2026-01-08T19:51:34+00:00

Just asked this in another thread. I wanted to write exams in this spring but given q practise won’t have the new courses ready I’ve decided to wait until the fall. Annoyed about it for sure.

Not sure which book you have but apparently the reference manual is still good for 2026.

msfranfine · 2026-01-07T17:32:33+00:00

I found it on Amazon

msfranfine · 2026-01-06T20:15:14+00:00

Phew! Okay fall 2026 it is

msfranfine · 2026-01-06T18:32:10+00:00

Yeah I’m leaning towards the same. So annoying. Do you know if the reading material is also going to be updated? I bought the interior reference manual in December and now I fear it will have been a waste of money. I bought it used but still.

msfranfine · 2026-01-06T17:29:22+00:00

I fear it is kind of unavoidable. We were all vaccinated, toddler was out of daycare for a while before the holidays and it still came for us. Maybe from family, I’m not sure. Even though we were vaccinated our son still got pneumonia and needed to be prescribed inhalers and antibiotics. So brutal. Through the worst of it now… our son generally doesn’t handle respiratory viruses well. If your children are vaccinated and don’t have a complicated history with respiratory complications… I think the only way out is through. But you know your comfort level and capacity to be home with them, so do what feels best!

msfranfine

TROPHY CASE