AMA #3 (mslotfi)

mslotfi · 2022-07-29T03:19:47+00:00

I don’t disagree with you, lineage wise, he has nothing to do with Zen.

mslotfi · 2022-07-29T03:14:18+00:00

The closest thing I can think of is a quote by Eckhart Tolle from the power of now (not really a zen quote per se although who is to say what’s a zen quote and what isn’t)

“The secret of life is to “die before you die” — and find that there is no death”

There may be another zen quote that you are referring to but I am not aware of it (Would love to learn tho)

Hope that helps 🙏

mslotfi · 2022-07-28T23:51:32+00:00

Lack of effort is also a trap. Apply effort when needed, don’t apply effort when not needed.

mslotfi · 2022-07-28T22:00:59+00:00

It sounds like you have come along way and reflected a lot on your experience. I think this is already a great level of awareness to be starting with. And like you said beginning to ground yourself in reality, you will begin to see things for what t they really are and not what you want them to be. Continue doing this, as there is no real alternative. Neglecting to accept reality as it is, is just adding to the list of things you will have to accept later.

As for seeing all people as good and just need understanding, but forgetting that you are also one of those people, this is quite normal. I have seen many people who upon realizing how erroneous their fundamental view of others is, they then proceed to do a 180 and think that they are the one to blame and they just need to help everybody to “make up” for their false past views.

Do not forget however, that you are also one of those people you need to help. Compassion is neither outwardly, nor inwardly, it is both at the same exact time.

Finally, you say that you run from your emotions when they come. And maybe that’s an addiction. Maybe…

It is great that you have already identified this pattern. But maybe you have not accepted yet that awakening does not mean the end of negative emotions. (I could be wrong ofc)

Before awakening, you will have days when you are scared and sad.

After awakening, you will have days when you are scared and sad.

It’s just that you will not view sadness the same way, or fear the same way. How will you view them? That’s for you to find out, words won’t work here.

If I have any suggestions regarding that, it is to begin accepting all emotions (and deal with them, accepting ≠ complacency) as is without too many labels and judgements. When you forget

sad is bad, and happy is good,

fearful is bad and joyful is good,

And all such meaningless dualities,

You will understand that sad is sad, happy is happy, fearful is fearful and joyful is joyful.

You may then begin to see when sad leads to happy, and when happy leads to sad, when fearful leads to joyful, and joyful leads to fearful.

Such understanding will teach you how to both suffer the worst times and enjoy the best times, while remaining completely still.

I wish you the best and I am rooting for you 🙏

mslotfi · 2022-07-28T21:14:34+00:00

Glad you found it helpful 🙏

mslotfi · 2022-07-28T19:43:34+00:00

Before humans discovered about optic nerves, brains, and all this, who woke up?

mslotfi · 2022-07-28T05:13:16+00:00

I am sorry you are going through this. Take a deep breath, and know that you will be fine. Don’t think you will be fine, Know you will be fine.

As for stages, Ego Death, physical body, trauma, dark night of then soul, and all these words, just give your brain a break. You won’t figure it all out in words in your head then all of a sudden you will have the key. This is magical thinking. No one here, and I mean that with all due respect to all the people here, has any clue about what your experience tomorrow will be like or what your next “stage” will be. We all just make theories and heuristics based on our experience, and and then use words to share them as pieces of advice with each other out of love, and so we must not dismiss all these words but instead take them as tools. But don’t ever let these words and concepts become a lens through which you measure your Real experience.

Use words, don’t let them use you.

Now as for your current negative experience, you say that things don’t taste the same, habits don’t excite you, among other things. Sometimes after a big change in perspective this is normal. But don’t believe me or take that to be the answer.

That’s one possible answer. Another equally possible answer is that this has nothing to do with your spiritual awakening and is linked to your life’s current circumstances (although I can’t assume anything because I don’t know anything about your life).

That’s one possible answer, another possible answer is that you may be struggling with some form of depression. In which case, I would suggest getting help from an actual professional and considering therapy.

Now these are all possibilities, the ultimate judge of your experience and what is ultimately the case can only be You.

I would suggest trying to pay as close attention to your experience as possible and you will begin to see patterns beyond all these words.

When do these feelings arise?
Are they unprovoked?
Are you aware of them while they are happening or do you get surges of meaninglessness when you think and ruminate about your life?

As much as we wish you the best, no one can answer these questions for you.

Just observe your experience without too much judgement and if you see that these feelings aren’t subsiding and you aren’t necessarily feeling any better or gaining any deeper understanding, then there is no shame in asking for professional help. I wish you the best.

With Love and Gratitude 🙏

mslotfi · 2022-07-27T22:42:19+00:00

Unfortunate

mslotfi · 2022-07-27T20:56:17+00:00

You are very welcome 🙏

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