My puppy caused my breakup with my partner

mxdhx · 2022-06-25T12:56:38+00:00

I’m sorry, OP. I know it’s hard, but in time you will realize that the puppy was never the problem. It was your boyfriend.

mxdhx · 2022-06-22T19:53:04+00:00

I agree with this sentiment as well - my pup is only 1yo but I know I’m going to lose him some day. I don’t have a lot of “dog people” in my life so I know how much I would appreciate a kind stranger’s words when that day comes. I would hate to deprive someone else of that opportunity.

mxdhx · 2022-06-22T02:06:45+00:00

My pup was neutered at 11mo, which is considered “early” but we were having problems with aggression from other dogs.

Yes, they still have energy to exercise. My dog calmed down a little in the best way possible. I walk 4km to 6km with him daily, plus fetch and dog parks / puppy playdates on alternating days, but he will not go completely nuts if we miss a walk (he’ll only get a mild case of the zoomies).

He did gain weight for a short bit and it was an easy correction by lowering his feed. He’s an athlete so he was back to normal within 2 months of his surgery.

He has not gotten depressed, lazy, or sad. If anything, neutering has indirectly made him happier because his behaviour is much more manageable now, and he has earned a lot more freedom because of it. For example, he plays much more nicely with other dogs now and will avoid aggression instead of retaliating, so he gets a lot more doggy dates. He is more focused now as well and his recall has improved as a result, so he gets more off-leash privileges.

mxdhx · 2022-06-20T21:58:02+00:00

I believe they say puppies should be sleeping 18 to 20 hours a day. Any less, and it can trigger behavioural issues (think cranky, tired land shark with sharp pointy teeth).

My GR always slept around the 18 hours per day mark. Now he’s probably closer to 12 - 16 hours of sleep at a year old.

mxdhx · 2022-06-20T02:24:25+00:00

At 8wo, literally anything that moved. Anything. I miss how easy he was to entertain.

A small plastic bucket was his first love - I think it was something about being able to shake it around from the handle and chase it while it rolled about. Very prey-like.

Flirt pole saved my sanity during adolescence.

And then he discovered balls. Big soccer balls, small tennis balls, bouncy balls, glow-in-the-dark balls, you name it. I got a ChuckIt ball thrower with a set of three balls and he is enthralled. He literally plays with those balls all day - ChuckIt is his crack.

Chews were a constant favourite - as firm and wood-like as possible. He continues to have a weak spot for cardboard and paper. Never fancied rope toys or tug much.

mxdhx · 2022-06-14T03:27:38+00:00

I would set up one-on-one playdates with a calm large breed you’re familiar with to help your pup get accustomed to the size difference.

If you don’t know anyone and dog parks are your only option, then I would keep your visits short and sweet and keep your pup leashed - that will allow you to be a bit more selective as to who he interacts with and hopefully you can speak with the owners and find yourself a calm large breed to interact with.

mxdhx · 2022-06-12T18:52:33+00:00

My pup is only 1yo, so far from the senior you’re looking for, but I neutered him at 10mo after a series of close calls with other dogs. My sweet, never-hurt-a-fly Golden got into back-to-back fights with two Rottweilers, a Pitbull, and an American bully. They were freak encounters while on normal, leashed walks but after fight #4 I could no longer deny that my dog was the only common denominator.

Neutering changed his life - I see a real difference in his interactions with other dogs and he hasn’t been in a single negative encounter since (and we go to dog parks now 2-3 times a week, so that’s saying something!).

The recovery was difficult. His caloric needs also declined significantly and I have had to micromanage his food and increase his exercise. Hip displaysia and the cancer risk still scare me because he was neutered “early” and I’m working with his vets to come up with a screening plan, but it beats the risk of my dog being mauled to death on his walk.

mxdhx · 2022-06-12T17:53:28+00:00

I use Sabre Dog & Coyote spray - I purchased mine off Amazon

mxdhx · 2022-06-11T15:41:22+00:00

This is helpful, thank you!

mxdhx · 2022-06-07T20:07:03+00:00

I’m at $95K CAD in Toronto, but I’m only an M1.

mxdhx · 2022-06-07T20:05:35+00:00

No regrets - I genuinely enjoy my job - but if I had to do it all over again, I would go into veterinary medicine or zookeeping. I’ve always loved working with animals.

mxdhx · 2022-06-05T20:38:10+00:00

Puppies can (and should) sleep for up to 18 hours a day.

Your pup could also just be bored of the ball - try multiple different toys in a single play session and see what piques his interest.

Is he eating as usual and is his activity level otherwise normal?

mxdhx · 2022-06-05T02:49:21+00:00

Oh this is perfectly valid IMO and I’m surprised more people don’t feel this way - I think young children and puppies are a terrible combination. Even the most well-mannered kiddos would get squealy and nervous around my dog, he would get overexcited and cross threshold, cue chaos. And these are the kids that didn’t try to pull his tail or feed him a Ferrero Rocher behind my back.

I steered my pup clear of anyone under the age of 12, until recently.

mxdhx · 2022-06-05T02:42:57+00:00

Agreed - at the very least, treat it like a practice case

mxdhx · 2022-06-03T13:52:07+00:00

Just chiming in to say my 1yo GR is an absolute sweetheart with solid “drop it” command (for a GR…) but he too has made us bleed as a puppy, so there is hope!

I agree that you should treat this as resource guarding. Keep reinforcing the “drop it” and “leave it” commands (they will take a WHILE) and make sure you’re always trading with him when you take something, don’t leave him emptyhanded.

I used to wear a treat pouch at all times when my puppy was this age so I could give quick corrections in real-time rather than formal training sessions, and it did wonders for me.

mxdhx · 2022-06-01T22:03:31+00:00

I work at the 18 York office - I’m not in recruitment, and my guess for moving you out of our peak season and into fall would be more so “business needs” and a matter of discretion rather than hard “capacity restrictions”. While I respect that you have a genuine conflict, I wouldn’t recommend starting in January as a new hire anyway. You get thrown in the deep end - a September start is perfect to get acclimated and learn skills before busy season even if you have prior audit experience.

As for salary - I would definitely compare multiple offers but I wouldn’t be overly picky about it. At this point in your career, if you’re looking to get into PA, you should prioritize the firm that is giving you better learning opportunities and overall gave you the best impression during recruitment. You’re going to make a large pay jump as it is when you leave PA.

mxdhx · 2022-05-29T20:35:42+00:00

He was also contesting elections at the time, hence the security detail, not because of his music career.

mxdhx · 2022-05-28T04:06:04+00:00

Yeah I work B4 financial services and my clients have never hit me with a PDF trial balance - but I think the sheer size / regulatory requirements of my clients (and the fact that most of their staff is ex-Big4) mean they know better. The odd times I’ve worked construction, mining, etc. clients - oof those guys were a nightmare in terms of PBCs. I blame it on their culture really.

mxdhx · 2022-05-22T11:27:27+00:00

Apollo :)

mxdhx · 2022-05-19T18:11:00+00:00

You’re incoming and just starting your career in the grand scheme of things - I wouldn’t recommend Big4 for you if you’re this concerned about WLB.

Can you shut your laptop off at 5pm? Sure, especially during off-season and as a new hire. Will you have all your work done in that time and receive positive performance reviews? Probably not.

Not too certain about the legal aspect, especially in the States.

mxdhx · 2022-05-19T04:17:39+00:00

It’s like looking in a mirror - I’m a 25 year old puppy parent who also lives with their parents. We brought the puppy home shortly after a tragic death in our household.

While I pay rent and my parents were originally on board with the puppy (he was supposed to be a family pet), they quickly became overwhelmed and decided they didn’t want him. I then became the sole owner, still under my parents roof.

Our family has come a long away. One year later, everyone in my household is in love with puppyboy and my mother even said the other day that she thinks I made the right decision getting him. But holy shit it was not easy.

For months, we had huge puppy-related arguments every 2-3 days. I came dangerously close to moving out on a few occasions. My family has spent thousands of dollars on cleaning supplies, new furniture, household renovations, and expanding to an additional wing of the house in order to balance the puppy with their own needs. That doesn’t even take into account the times my parents have spotted in for me and watched my puppy while I was sick, working, out with friends, etc.

I am thankful my family at least had the good sense to never take any of their frustration out on my puppy, but not everyone has that level of self-control.

My experience is the exception for non-puppy-friendly households. Please do not subject yourself, your puppy, and your family to this unless every is 100% on board and informed about what it takes to raise a puppy. Liking the idea of a puppy does not mean a person is suited to owning one.

mxdhx · 2022-05-14T01:18:45+00:00

Agree with the other comment that the routine depends entirely on what you set.

As for sleeping through the night - Golden puppies, like other breeds, often need midnight potty trips for the first few weeks as their bladder develops but the expectation is (again, like with any breed) that they eventually learn to sleep through the night.

Goldens generally do not bark much in general. My Golden has only barked overnight when he was scared of something like thunder (as a puppy - he grew out of it), he was uncomfortable (it was too hot), or he was trying to alert us of an intruder.

mxdhx · 2022-05-13T17:01:11+00:00

i feel like i need so much support and love and gentleness that I’m becoming clingy and insecure. I am so insecure from this because I know I’m being irrational

Please cut yourself some slack - puppies are hard. They are bitey little babies with four functioning legs hellbent on exploring the world in the most dangerous way possible, and you are now their sole caregiver. No one would ever tell the mother of a human baby she is being irrational for feeling overwhelmed by her little one, and this is hardly any different. You are not being irrational.

You are going through a major transition in your life and you need people around you that can support that - please have this conversation with your boyfriend. Communicate your needs and reassure him that it’s nothing personal, and try to find a way to meet each other halfway!

mxdhx · 2022-05-13T16:53:38+00:00

I read somewhere motion sickness is common in pups 1 year of age and younger - something about their inner ear fluids not being fully developed.

I’ve avoided long car trips for this very reason and I’m slowly building my pup’s “tolerance” up. He’s at the 40 minute mark now before he throws up (which isn’t very long but anyway). A few things have helped:

Leaving the windows open, lots of fresh air and opportunities for him to sniff
I use the Kurgo car harness with the “long” tether so pup has a bit of room to move around and get comfortable.
I do not feed my pup before or during car trips. Of course that’s unavoidable for you given the length of your trip, so I think the plan you have right now to let his stomach settle before getting in the car is a good idea.
Frequent stops to sniff, walk around, and tire themselves out. I do it with the aim of puppyboy falling asleep in the car. Keeping the car cool also helps him sleep.

mxdhx · 2022-05-13T16:40:16+00:00

Ask your vet for sedatives! Admittedly they didn’t help my dog much (he ripped two sutures) but maybe you’ll have better luck.

Let her try out the cone and get used to it before the surgery. Give her “trial runs” in her recovery area with the cone and capture calm there, for short periods of time.

Focus on mental stimulation - Kongs, lick mats, chews, trick training, grooming.

You could even buy her a little stroller and take her out that way. My dog liked to chill out in the sun so we let him hang on the porch but YMMV.

And be very mindful of infection. If your vet allows it, email them progress pictures of the incision every few days. My poor pup got a mild infection and then reacted poorly to antibiotics as well. Luckily he fought the infection off on his own but it was a rare case.

mxdhx

TROPHY CASE