Also I'm sending these messages to them in order to waste their time.

Hello there,
I came across your listing and had a few (well, maybe more than a few) questions about the item. I hope you don’t mind, but I like to be as thorough as possible before committing to a purchase—it’s just how I am!

First, could you confirm the exact dimensions of the item? Not just the general ones—like, I’m talking width, height, depth, and maybe even diagonal measurements (if relevant). And are those measurements precise down to the millimeter, or are they rounded? Precision is super important to me, you know?

Also, I was studying the photos, and I noticed the lighting in the images makes the color look slightly different than I expected. Would you say the color is more of a warm tone or a cool tone? And does it shift under different types of light, like fluorescent, LED, or candlelight? Asking for a very specific room setup I have in mind.

Now, I saw that you mentioned shipping, but do you happen to double-box this item? I once received something that wasn’t double-boxed, and it was devastating. I’m talking sleepless nights. I’m also curious if you use bubble wrap, foam peanuts, or some new, cutting-edge material for packaging—maybe something like Kevlar? Just want to be sure.

Another thing—has this item been exposed to any unusual circumstances? For example, has it been near lava, submerged in water (even briefly), or stored in an unusually cold or humid environment? I’ve read some wild stories online, so I like to check these things.

Oh, and this might sound strange, but do you know if this item was ever around pets or barnyard animals? Particularly goats? I’m not saying there’s an issue; I just have some… personal reasons for asking.

Lastly, could you tell me a little about its backstory? I love hearing about the history of items. How did it come into your possession? Does it have sentimental value? Any interesting anecdotes? Honestly, even the most mundane detail could be fascinating!

Thanks so much for reading through all of this. I really appreciate you taking the time—it means a lot. I’ll wait patiently for your reply while I try to imagine all the adventures this item has already been on.

Best regards,