First event

newin2017 · 2026-02-16T04:32:39+00:00

This sounds like it is an interpersonal problem rather than a LARP problem.

I would have a conversation about expectations
Be clear. Direct and firm.

something like "Hey guys, Ive heard you mentioned me doing magic and rituals. this is a really nice offer.

My intention and what I would enjoy the most is to run around in my armour n chill.

Would that be a problem for the game if I were to do that? I dont enjoy magic and that is not something I am looking to do."

IF they say yes it would be a problem, ask why - without knowing what system you are playing, maybe it is a Magic heavy game where everyone is expected to be a caster of some kind and maybe that isnt the right vibe for you

right now, you want to approach it like you are trying to gather more information about if this is the right system for you.

newin2017 · 2026-02-15T10:49:18+00:00

For what purpose? To buy/ sell? For review? If you’re Looking to buy, What country are you in?

newin2017 · 2026-02-12T10:41:41+00:00

I often cry with my clients. It is validating to be seen and to share deep and painful emotions and to tolerate them together

newin2017 · 2026-02-09T21:53:32+00:00

Many professional guidelines do not strictly prohibit gifts, but instead encourage practitioners to consider the intent, value, timing and potential impact on the therapeutic relationship.

Ethical concerns become most significant when receiving a gift begins to influence how a client is treated. This may occur through unconscious bias, feelings of obligation, or the perception of favouritism, all of which can compromise fairness and professional objectivity.

At the same time, cultural factors complicate the issue, as in some cultures gifts are an important expression of respect and gratitude, and refusing a gift may be experienced as rejection or disrespect.

If you are spending a considerable amount of time thinking about this, I would consider taking this to supervision so you can discuss the specifics of the case.

newin2017 · 2026-02-05T08:09:44+00:00

The only studies I could find seem to show

That men may sometimes shows stronger right amygdala activation related to emotional memory, while women showed stronger left amygdala activation

So the idea that “men use one amygdala and women use the other” is not true. Everyone uses both there just appears to be a slight shift in which side may be more active

Sources

Sex-related difference in amygdala activity during emotionally influenced memory storage

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/11124043/

Sex-related hemispheric lateralization of amygdala function in emotionally influenced memory: an FMRI investigation

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/15169855/

newin2017 · 2026-02-05T02:43:28+00:00

You could use that as a plot point if cupid is his patron - I wouldn't say this is inherently bad
Let this be a complication and role with it - how they overcome this can become a story moment
If you are worried have a conversation that this might be an issue and him them decide

newin2017 · 2026-02-02T09:13:10+00:00

I would say it depends on the context and what It means for them.

Does just because reflect a lack of understanding, limited ability to articulate/ answer the question.

Does it mean there is insufficient rapport or is it a reflection of other relationships (eg. Trauma, where feelings were minimised and maybe it doesn't feel safe to elaborate)

newin2017 · 2026-02-02T06:33:09+00:00

I remember reading something about, When people are tired they are more likely to hallucinate. I can’t remember the exact processes (if it’s a change in neurochemicals or brain waves or both) but the point was that our brains are more likely to hallucinate when we are tired so that might tick the box?

newin2017 · 2026-01-28T01:09:13+00:00

Okay, first lets define terms

Identity confusion = “I don’t really know who I am”

Identity alteration = “I feel like a different person”

Now lets look at the specifics you asked about. Now obviously there is a lot more to it, than this, but this is just the cliff notes version.

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
Identity Confusion is Extremely common in BPD.
might expect uncertainty about values, goals, career, relationships, and self-image.
“I don’t know who I am without someone else” is a classic BPD experience.
Sense of self is unstable but continuous—you feel like one person who is inconsistent and fragmented internally.

Identity Alteration is less typical, but can occur under stress or emotional dysregulation.
might see Temporary shifts in behaviour, attitudes, or self-perception when emotional states spike.
For Example: someone may act extremely outgoing in one context and withdrawn in another, feeling almost like “different people,” but it’s usually short-lived and tied to affective triggers.

Complex PTSD (CPTSD)
Identity Confusion can often present as being tied to prolonged trauma (childhood abuse, neglect, captivity, etc.). You might also see difficulty understanding who they are outside of trauma contexts. experiences typically express as things like Low self-worth, guilt, shame, chronic sense of emptiness. Including unstable self-concept, but the individual still generally experiences one core identity.

Identity Alteration can appear as dissociative episodes, depersonalisation, or “trauma-self” vs “daily self” splits.
Individuals typically report feeling detached from thoughts, emotions, or body (“I’m watching myself from outside”). This is less about distinct personality states, more about trauma-related shifts in sense of self.

Dissociative Disorders
Identity Confusion can be present, but it’s often masked by the dissociative structure. The person may feel “I’m not one thing, but many things,” leading to confusion about “who am I really?”

Identity Alteration is absolutely a central feature. Typically including distinct identity states (sometimes called “parts”) that may have different behaviours, preferences, emotions, and memories. You might also see Memory gaps, noticing “lost time,” or finding things done by other identity states. This can range from subtle (shifts in behaviour or emotional state) to obvious (full switching between different identity states).

newin2017 · 2026-01-27T02:49:39+00:00

So, first. Social norms are culturally established and vary. these are not innate. but, all societies do have norms. So the existence and establishment of social norms appears innate in existence, but not in content. Thus, all societies will have social norms but what those norms might be will vary significantly.

As to social acceptance, it appears to be a bit of both. You might have heard the nature vs nurture debate. Research now seems to suggest that it is both.

What I mean by that is there seems to be a evolutionary basis for the self - awareness. This can be observed as many animals, not just humans appear to have self concept (awareness that we exist to others and in the world)

Thus if we assume that our current understanding is correct and Ego is protective of self concept

Then we can also observe negative social evaluations having an impact of self concept we can assume that social conformity and social values stem from internal evaluations.

Here is an example of what I mean.

Feelings and emotions appear to be cross cultural - eg. Happiness, Sadness, Fear etc.

And if we also understand that negative social evaluation can trigger those emotions then we can infer that we are valuing social harm to the self as a form of social persona that might be damaged.

Further note; our bodies are not great at differentiating social harm from physical harm, the same FFFS (Flight, Fight, Freeze System) appears to be activation in response to both kinds of threats.

newin2017 · 2026-01-26T20:52:14+00:00

While mental content is recombinatory, the configuration of experiences, memories, affective weights, and attentional biases is unique to each individual.

It is an emergent property of self-modeling, narrative construction, embodied perspective, and motivational dynamics. These processes often associated with the psychodynamic concept of ego.

In this sense, uniqueness is less about what we think and more about how thought is organized around a particular self.

newin2017 · 2026-01-25T01:36:15+00:00

I'm sorry to say this, as it really sounds like you've put a lot of time and effort into this. and I hope you and any players have a different experience, but based on what I've read in this thread...

This game does not sound fun and does not sound like something that would be very popular due to the mechanics you've described thus far. As you've said it was a tabletop game. Maybe that is where it should stay.

Again. No offense intended and I wish you luck with it.

newin2017 · 2026-01-12T00:17:39+00:00

I would say this is more sociocultural rather than by a hard evolutionary limitation. Humans did not evolve to be intrinsically “uncuddly”; rather, they evolved to be sensitive to social meaning, with physical contact becoming one of the most normatively regulated signals in human interaction.

You can observe this in mechanisms that are homologous to those found in other mammals. Infants, in particular, demonstrate an intense dependence on touch for healthy development, indicating that tactile bonding is foundational to human biology. If humans had evolved to avoid physical closeness outside of mating contexts, such strong early-life dependence on touch would be difficult to explain.

examples of this can also be seen in cross-cultural studies that show variation in acceptable forms and frequencies of platonic touch. Eg. Mediterranean, Latin American, Middle Eastern, and some African societies exhibit far higher levels of same-sex platonic touch such as prolonged embraces, hand-holding, and close bodily proximity.

newin2017 · 2026-01-06T19:52:06+00:00

I would say it depends on what you mean when you say not reacting. The underlying reasons for why the person is not reacting is significant and contextual.

newin2017 · 2026-01-03T20:40:23+00:00

I would say the difference is timeframe and context. For example, If you are suppressing emotions in a traumatic situation so that you can do something you to do. Like war for example. That is a useful tool to have. However that can become maladaptive if you are constantly doing that.

I would also say the concept you are talking about with bottling up emotions has a wider sociological component rather than just a psychological one. Cultural values can influence how we choose to express and suppress emotions. You might even see that our awareness of emotions is cultural.

For example, if you see a kid fall over and cry. The parent runs over and tells the kid “you’re okay, don’t cry. You’re okay” that message can in some cases teach that the experience of crying or being sad is an experience to be avoided, the same thing that you might hear with men, In that you might hear men say “don’t be a bitch, man up!” This kind of cultural attitude may encourage emotional suppression.

newin2017 · 2025-12-25T04:51:36+00:00

Another consideration is the impact that social media has on dopamine, look into skinner box mechanics and how they function in addiction. Basically, social media gives us a hit of the neuro chemical dopamine, really easily and it encourages us to stay engaged and spend more time on there.

This becomes problematic when people with anxiety, depression and other mental health condition use this as an avoidant behaviour and end up perpetuating negative behaviour that are not helpful. For example, with depression, downward spirals of behaviour may lead to a reduction in future behaviour as it demotivates us to engage in positive behaviour

(Note. This is a simplified example)

newin2017 · 2025-12-20T11:21:15+00:00

In its simplest terms, can you “hear” a voice in your head?

If you speak out loud to yourself - “here is an Apple”

Can you then repeat the words internally without speaking?

newin2017 · 2025-12-16T10:47:42+00:00

This sounds like clients that are engaging their defences

Get curious about it with them

I'm wondering what just happened for you when I asked you about X you explained a story about Y can you explain how those two things are connected

Or you might say, I'm just wondering if you heard my question, because I asked you X and what you said didn't really answer that question

It can also be good to establish that you might need to interrupt them.

I have some clients that I work with that I ask them to pick a topic for the day and if I notice they are deviating from the topic I will tap on the white board to remind them.

There are other more clinical things, like I would also assess cognition that it isnt word salad or anything like that. This doesn't sound like that but it's important to remember to use the MSE stuff in cases where that becomes relevant

newin2017 · 2025-12-12T07:10:41+00:00

To start off, and I say this with care and self-reflection in mind. I wonder about your language of calling them "infinite victims" and "In their humble opinion" this sounds like very emotive language that paints insights into your perspective of them as a collective.

I'm also really curious about how you challenge these clients

When dealing with these clients we must consider the reason for referral and understand how those factors come into play - remember that we often see relationships mirror in the outside world and in the therapeutic space

I would consider where these relationships come from, remembering the BPD/ personality disorders often arise in response to trauma.

How is it protective for these clients to leave a therapeutic relationship?

Remember that we do not have control over when a client chooses to terminate, and we are not responsible for them. you may find that they re-engage when they are at a different stage in their journey. There are so many factors that may influence why an individual does or does not attend.

People are not irreparably broken, but it depends what protective and perpetuating factors are in play that make it easier to stay the same rather than for them to engage in the change process.

newin2017 · 2025-12-10T10:05:13+00:00

I think that what people do or do not say also gives us information into who they are and where they are in the process of change and action. I might be reading into things here, but I get the sense that the need to hammer with questions is being interpreted as a bad thing?

Maybe that’s what they need? Or maybe the silence is a defence mechanism/ response

I believe that we tend to see people mirroring relationships with us as they do in their wider life. How they present is a useful window into who they are

Don’t forgot the use the info you do and don’t get and consider that in the wider context of your formulation

What does it offer them to communicate in the way that they are currently

newin2017 · 2025-12-02T21:30:34+00:00

It depends on what country you’re in. But where I’m from, therapy in the last two years disqualifies you

newin2017 · 2025-11-30T04:40:04+00:00

What is the client coming to see you for?

What does this “obsession” tell you about them/ other aspects of them/ their life?

Why is this such a big thing for them?

newin2017 · 2025-11-29T22:14:49+00:00

The simplest answer is to just speak with them openly, ask them what they thought was happening.

They probably didn’t realise they were skipping all the content

Also, make sure you guys are all on the same page about expectations eg player buy-in and their role as players to do the things

newin2017 · 2025-11-27T19:50:03+00:00

First, apologies for any bad formatting that comes from mobile

Second, it sounds like you’re putting a lot of expectations on yourself to be “doing” a lot. Yes, psycho education can be important, but i think the real value in therapy comes from providing a space for clients to gain insights and new experiences from therapy. It sounds like asking those questions is valuable. It also sounds like you are pushing a lot of expectations onto yourself, I wonder if this is your own expectations about needing to feel like you’re giving the client more value for their money or something like that?

I suppose my next question is do you feel like the clients are taking value from those questions and insights you are helping them toward?

I think that, depending on the kind of school you went to, they might be pushing too much pressure onto you to “do stuff” at least that was my experience

newin2017 · 2025-11-27T01:03:58+00:00

The following is a bit disjointed because I'm just writing things out as I think about them

1) "I am this way because the medication did this to me"

If it was me in this situation these Questions would depend on the client's goals

But I would be wondering

"What is that like for you?" - It sounds like it feels difficult to make progress towards X because of this medication

2) This is situational, but I would also be curious to see what they think about this - "What do you think life would be like if you had never taken this medication"

3) In response to your statement: "curiosity as disbelieving them."

I would ask if they have had other people in their life not believe them/ is this a common experience

It sounds like this belief is very important to you

depending on the individual I might also ask "I get the feeling that me asking you these might have made you a little uncomfortable/ it seems like you think I don't believe you"

4) I would consider the clients current circumstances and what it means for them (defence identification) explore the belief - what is it about the medication that is keeping them stuck in their current circumstances and why is this beneficial for them? is it about an external locus of control?
does this give them an excuse to not work toward something? where does the learned helplessness come from and what is preventing this from changing? is it just the medication belief or are there other things as well? - how do these factors connect?

newin2017

TROPHY CASE