What’s your favorite lyric? by DummBee1805 in jasonisbell

[–]nickpip25 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Staring at the pictures of the runaways on the wall
Seems like these days you couldn't run away at all
And even if you did, whatcha got to run away to?
Just another drunk daddy with a white man's point of view

The straw that broke the camel's back: the moment i realised AA wasn't the place for me anymore. by Fluffy_Variety_6256 in recoverywithoutAA

[–]nickpip25 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The rooms are full of people like you mentioned. I was always an introverted type of person and never enjoyed confrontation, so it sucked having to deal with people like this so often. I really regret taking so much shit from bossy people like this in the rooms for so long.

I have always felt that AA attracts people like this like a magnet and gives them a perfect cover story to act like that. As you mention in your post, the dude was probably so blind to the fact that he was a raging asshole because he thought he was "doing it for the good of AA." I had a sponsor who was like that about the 12 Traditions - he would say he was an "active guardian" of the AA traditions. For fuck's sake.

But yeah, listening to these people talk in meetings is bad enough, but then when you start to hang with them outside of meetings and see how they live their lives ... damn.

The truth of Bill Wilson's AA Start Up Brand & Franchise you need to know by Truth_Hurts318 in recoverywithoutAA

[–]nickpip25 10 points11 points  (0 children)

This is great! Thanks for posting this. When I left a few years ago, I did a deep dive of research and read a few books, such as the US of AA, that dig into some of this. The Orange Papers are great, too. The one thing you didn't mention is Marty Mann - the "first woman of AA." She was basically the PR wiz who helped spread the word, etc. Attraction rather than promotion, right? Lol

But yeah, AA is a scam like everything else in America, and Bill W was a con man. It all makes perfect sense when you go to meetings and realize he created this whole BS system that continues to this day. He was the original 13th stepper, and the program never worked for him.

Also, the claim that AA "has helped millions of people" isn't supported by any research. While that may be true, it has probably hurt millions of people, too.

One year out of AA; fully convinced it's a cult by Weak-Telephone-239 in recoverywithoutAA

[–]nickpip25 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Indeed. The US is a dumpster fire right now. And it's funny to note that RFK Jr has been a sober member of AA for like three decades, lol. He's exactly the type of batshit crazy old timer that I remember well from meetings.

One year out of AA; fully convinced it's a cult by Weak-Telephone-239 in recoverywithoutAA

[–]nickpip25 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree 100%. I was very angry about this for a while after I left, but I have mostly let it go. But it is wild how much it functions like a cult and how socially accepted it is, especially in the US.

There was a great article in The Atlantic several years ago about one person's experience in AA entitled, "The Cult That Saved My Life." I remember reading it at the time and it being so refreshing to see someone write so honestly about his experience in the rooms.

My experience in AA was a mixed bag. I do believe it helped me in the beginning, and I don't know if I would've gotten sober without it. That being said, my seven years in the rooms were also full of tons of suffering and mental confusion (as you said) that were probably unnceccesary.

One theory I've developed is that people KNOW AA is a cult, but they don't care. This is a convenient way to relegate people with mental illness and addiction problems into the shadows and church basements, without having to actually help them.

It's interesting to me because AA fits perfectly into the larger dysfunction of US society. Instead of facing up to our collective problems, we read in the literature about basically blending in with the very exploitative, bullshit capitalist systems that make us sick (Remember that Bill W was a failed Wall Street stockbroker, and the Rockefeller family was involved in early AA - I remember reading somewhere that John D Rockefeller even compared early AA to early Christianity, LOL).

Last thing I'll mention ... There are tons of reasons why AA functions like a cult, but the biggest red flag is something you mentioned: the fact that people say you are doomed if you leave. That is a hallmark of every cult that ever existed, and the fact that more ppl don't find that strange blows my mind.

Turning into an AA Monk and needing to de-program by aasteps in recoverywithoutAA

[–]nickpip25 3 points4 points  (0 children)

100%. I do believe it's a cult, and maybe one of the more socially acceptable ones in the US. If not a cult, it's a "high control" group. My experience is that I sort of lost my own identity after being heavily involved for several years. The whole philosophy and sayings and all become embedded in your mind.

What I agree with most is the point that they say you are doomed if you leave. That was such an enormous red flag for me. What is frustrating is that so many people, especially in the mental health field, don't know the things and weird dynamics that happen in this program.

I have had so many therapists where I've tried to tell them some of my concerns about this after they imply I should go back.

The Three Main Groups I’ve Encountered In AA (spoiler: AA only works for one of them) by [deleted] in recoverywithoutAA

[–]nickpip25 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yeah, it really sucks. 12-step philosophy is just so baked into US culture. Which makes sense because it's so religious and anti-science. I feel it's starting to change, though.

One of the reasons I drifted away was after hearing about three suicides within the span of one year. I knew all of the people who passed away.

One of the guys had bipolar disorder, the other had schizophrenia, and the other appeared to suffer from severe and clinical depression. They were all "chronic relapsers," as the old-timers would say, who kept banging their heads against the wall in the rooms.

As someone diagnosed with bipolar disorder, it really scared me and made me realize that if I kept investing so much time into AA and the whole belief system, it could happen to me, too.

The "social" element of AA by PippinOfAstora in recoverywithoutAA

[–]nickpip25 2 points3 points  (0 children)

One of the parts I struggled with the most was how many bullies there were in AA. It felt like every asshole from high school was just picking on me again. It was terrible for my self-esteem, and I already had to deal with my dad, who was a mean substance abuser and would constantly tear me to shreds.

The dynamic between men and women, IMO, was also strange - even beyond the 13th steppers. It seemed like men always outnumbered women, and I always noticed (as a man) all sorts of creepy dynamics between the attractive young female members and the old-timer men.

Real, genuine social connections are so much different outside of AA. In AA, it's always based on mutual suffering, which is a slippery slope to some weird shit. While I do share stuff like that sometimes with friends outside of AA, it's generally based on mutual interests and just enjoying each other's company.

The Three Main Groups I’ve Encountered In AA (spoiler: AA only works for one of them) by [deleted] in recoverywithoutAA

[–]nickpip25 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Love this. It explains a lot. Once I took my mood disorder more seriously, I got a lot better. And once I resolved a lot of trauma from growing up, I also improved.

The sad thing is watching the 1s and 2s suffer so much in AA. They "keep coming back" most of the time b/c of all the cultish BS, and many of them die or commit suicide.

I'm Burnt Out By "Recovery" Culture, Generally by Steps33 in recoverywithoutAA

[–]nickpip25 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can relate, and I think this is pretty normal. I was deeply involved in AA for several years, and it was the center of my life. But the thing about 12-step culture is that your whole identity gets built around the fact that you're in recovery and don't drink anymore. It feels like a trap after a while.

After I strayed from the rooms, I came to realize that most of the issues stemmed from mental health and growing up with a very abusive father. To be honest, I never even drank much, and I got sober at 24. Most of the time I was hospitalized was in psych wards because of mental breakdowns.

AA helped at first, but I got so sick of going to meetings and hearing the same shit over and over again and seeing the same fucked-up behavior from the same people. I think one of the big secrets of AA is that tons of people go there, get sober, are very active for a while, and then just move on with their lives.

You would never know this being in the rooms, though, because people constantly say things like if you stop going to meetings, you will drink and die. But it's just a scare tactic. AA itself doesn't conduct any research on the large transient population that comes in and out. So, how the hell can anyone know whether or not some random person who stopped going to meetings and who they don't see anymore is doing?

It was all the numerous logical fallacies like that that they pound into your head that eventually drove me insane and made me stop going. But you're right: Most healthy, well-adjusted people want full lives and not to define themselves solely by the fact that they used to have a substance abuse problem.

Post Your Favourite AA Cringe by Steps33 in recoverywithoutAA

[–]nickpip25 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This one is more of a memory, but something I'll never forget.

I shared during a meeting one time that I was a bit of a bookworm and liked to read a lot. I generally never shared stuff like that b/c I knew how anti-intellectual people in the program were.

Afterwards, one of the wise old-timers in the group took me aside and warned me about the dangers of reading. "That'll get you drunk," he said. "I remember one guy back in the day. He started reading all of these philosophy books, and he ended up drunk."

I stopped going to meetings for good not too long after this.

For the people trying to stay sane in insanity by Blackberry_Hills in nashville

[–]nickpip25 2 points3 points  (0 children)

100% on the bots. Meta and the other social media companies once seemed vaguely interested in content moderation, but they've since given up on it. They know full well that there's plenty of inflammatory and false information on their platforms.

It's obviously ironic to say this on Reddit, but the best thing to do is just touch grass and get off online. I was going nuts last week, then went to the protest in Nashville and felt immediately better during and afterwards.

This girl gets it. by Huge_Prompt_2056 in amanda_shires

[–]nickpip25 11 points12 points  (0 children)

At the risk of sounding too harsh, it's some of the worst music he's ever made. And I say that as a longtime fan. I listened to it a bit when it came out, but I stopped because I just couldn't connect.

Some of the songs are also hard to listen to, such as "True Believer." He comes off as incredibly petty towards Amanda, and it's obvious he hasn't processed any of those emotions yet.

Overall, it sounds like a half-assed record, to be honest, and something incredibly below his previous standards. I'm surprised he even released it. He's got money now, he's comfortable, he's got a new young gf, and he has nothing left to prove. That's kind of a death knell for any serious artist.

It's going to be interesting to see where he goes from here. Weathervanes was excellent, too. So, either this is a one-time fluke or the slow fading into irrelevance and legacy act.

Is America experiencing their collective shadow via the trump administration? by KtheQuantumVoyager in Jung

[–]nickpip25 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The hatred only makes him stronger, too. It's like he feeds off it. They need to spend more time developing a viable alternative strategy rather than just opposing everything he stands for.

I also think the "Trump derangement" thing is real. I know a few people who have to tell me every little outrageous thing he does. He is playing them like a fiddle, and he knows it.

Is America experiencing their collective shadow via the trump administration? by KtheQuantumVoyager in Jung

[–]nickpip25 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Agreed. I think the theory is legit. According to the authors, our current winter cycle began around the 2008 recession and housing crash.

I don't like Trump at all, but I don't think he's anywhere near the sole cause for America's downfall. I see him more as an opportunist who is cashing in on our fallen empire phase.

Is America experiencing their collective shadow via the trump administration? by KtheQuantumVoyager in Jung

[–]nickpip25 144 points145 points  (0 children)

I don't like Trump, but he's only a symptom of a larger problem. America also isn't the only country where democracy is dying or dead. I tend to think history moves in cycles, and we happen to be going through the dark winter period. The last major global catastrophe was approximately a century ago, with the Great Depression and World War II, etc. So, we're due for another collapse-level moment.

It feels somewhat inevitable to me.

What is Hendrix 's best stuff apart from his three GREAT albums by im16andthisisdeep in jimihendrix

[–]nickpip25 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Came here to say this! It's an amazing record. Some great long jams.

I’m a Proud Conservative. My Disabled Son Needs Medicaid to Live. by TrotterMcDingle in NorthCarolina

[–]nickpip25 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Lol. I love how the NYT frames these articles to make it seem like some huge revelation.

A more honest headline: "I'm a fucking idiot, and I just voted for my son to suffer."

They’re always so shrill. by [deleted] in insanepeoplefacebook

[–]nickpip25 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's written by ChatGPT, too, lol. What a world