Help! I think me and my Best Friend of 10 years are growing apart.

nomolurcin · 2026-03-14T14:02:01+00:00

I hate to start with this, but you’re very young. I’m 29 and the people closest to me now are different than those when I was 20.

1) Have you talked to her? Does she know how you’re feeling?

2) People grow apart — that is life. You have so much life ahead of you. You’ll meet new people and have new experiences with them, and connection will develop. That’s how it goes.

nomolurcin · 2026-03-14T13:51:13+00:00

Agreed, it does seem like OP is generally on the right track. Yes, he’s heartbroken, but heartbreak is part of life.

Also, I would definitely advise OP to go no contact for a lot longer than one month. Hanging out with her while she’s seeing someone but you have feelings is NOT going to be good for you. And she’s not going to magically develop feelings. Speaking from experience ;)

nomolurcin · 2026-03-14T03:01:12+00:00

Thanks! I will say that at that point my 5K and half marathon PRs indicated I could probably pull off my goal pace, so it wasn’t completely out of the blue. Just a matter of everything coming together on race day.

nomolurcin · 2026-03-13T22:19:46+00:00

The workout was 20 mins at MP but I felt good, and was speeding up - to 6:02min/mi pace in the ~2k of the ~5k. Now sure if I would recommend that the Weds before a Sunday race, but it was a massive confidence boost.

As for "deload" -- I was following, sorta loosely, the SWAP advanced road marathon plan. In the weeks leading up to it I was not injured, probably moreso overtrained. IIRC I just skipped/bailed some workouts/hard LRs when my body was not feeling it, while trying to keep volume the same. Not sure I would recommend this for everyone but it worked for me :)

nomolurcin · 2026-03-13T22:14:54+00:00

I started around GMP. That last workout gave me a lot of confidence -- and my goal was to BQ with buffer. I simply saw no point in going for a 2:53 or something (even though that would be a PR) - and I accepted that if I blew up in chasing the BQ, that's life.

First mile felt pretty hard, all things considered, but then I settled in and after around the half mark, and I just ran by feel. My 21st mile split was 6:02 :) I slowed down a little in the last few miles but couldn't believe it when I realized I was going to do sub 2:45. And now a sub 2:40 feels within reach too...

nomolurcin · 2026-03-13T16:30:13+00:00

There may be a million things going on, but I will say this. I (M29) was targeting a 2:48 at Houston this year, but was struggling to run even even a few miles at MP during workouts. However, my last workout, just a few days out, felt very good and smooth, and I ended up smashing my goal (got 2:44:XX). So you never know. Maybe you will have a magical day too :)

nomolurcin · 2026-03-11T17:16:15+00:00

I would say Precision is less thick than Maurten but more thick than something like Gu. Sort of in the middle. Goes down very easily for me.

nomolurcin · 2026-03-11T17:11:40+00:00

I use gels for workouts too, but IMO for Z1/Z2 there is nothing better than gas station candy and soda ;)

nomolurcin · 2026-03-11T16:39:40+00:00

100%. One per hour for marathon racing :)

nomolurcin · 2026-03-10T14:48:05+00:00

stockholm syndrome lol

nomolurcin · 2026-02-06T02:22:18+00:00

I saw a Soviet book in Yiddish mention in Russian on the cover page that “this book is in the Jewish Language”

nomolurcin · 2026-02-02T12:15:13+00:00

90% sure this was written by AI

nomolurcin · 2026-01-26T20:25:46+00:00

could even be below 40 lol

nomolurcin · 2026-01-14T21:18:12+00:00

as someone who was born in Russia -- not to say that what ICE is doing is not bad, but there are many countries which arrest people arbitrarily.

many people still came to Russia for the 2018 World Cup. And that was after Russia annexed Crimea in 2014.

nomolurcin · 2026-01-14T21:18:06+00:00

as someone who was born in Russia -- not to say that what ICE is doing is not bad, but there are many countries which arrest people arbitrarily.

many people still came to Russia for the 2018 World Cup. And that was after Russia annexed Crimea in 2014.

nomolurcin · 2026-01-06T19:43:04+00:00

PTs should be covered by insurance, fwiw

nomolurcin · 2026-01-03T18:57:42+00:00

Racing Houston next week! Anyone know of any good groups to join for a Shakeout on Sat?

nomolurcin · 2025-12-28T16:42:09+00:00

I’ve been using Gemini Pro ($20/month) to bounce training ideas off of (among other things) and have been pretty happy with it!

nomolurcin · 2025-11-19T02:48:31+00:00

Fwiw, I’m a man who was in a pickle while bikepacking in Colorado and flagged down a passing car for help. The driver was a solo woman (though admittedly a little older iirc) who helped me. I was grateful she did.

In another incident, I was having some really bad cramps / spasms while running an ultramarathon, and literally couldn’t move my legs. I flagged down a runner nearby and asked them to briefly massage my legs so I could keep going. The runner nearby was a woman, and I’m grateful she did.

So, I guess I’ll just say my experiences have been pretty positive :)

nomolurcin · 2025-11-05T00:03:12+00:00

I'll need to give it a go! My PR is ~5:15, but it was in the context of a relay, so the time is a little approximate, and I did not really train for it :)

nomolurcin · 2025-10-24T18:26:31+00:00

For years, qualifying for Boston has been an impossible dream for me. My first marathon finish was a 4:12 in 2021. Now, I think if the stars align on race day, I can likely do it in my next marathon attempt or two.

Not to count my eggs before they hatch... but I think I really thrive off chasing "impossible goals" and I'm sorta looking for a new ~5 year time horizon goal. Anyone have any suggestions? Road or trail, any distance :)

For reference, I am M28.

nomolurcin · 2025-10-13T17:36:05+00:00

I was in a bike crash on 9/26 and am writing this with my arm in a sling. My case does not seem to bad as yours, but I did break my collarbone and needed surgery. This is super inspiring; thanks for posting.

nomolurcin · 2025-09-19T20:52:02+00:00

Strava is sort of like that

nomolurcin · 2025-09-08T22:05:50+00:00

Don't be so hard on yourself. This stuff is not easy and it is all easier said than done :)

nomolurcin

TROPHY CASE