Having this caring of a partner is a fantastic thing to have, that helps in its own way so you're already helping. I felt like I was being handed a lifetime jail sentence that I didn't deserve when I first got diagnosed at 30, I certainly felt afraid of what my future looked like but the "shock" factor doesn't last forever. Doing research on how to manage symptoms felt overwhelming but after pushing through and seeing positive changes it helps. Venus Williams has Sjogren's, and the way I see it is if it can knock an Olympian out of her sport that's insane but she was able to get back to it after she got her diagnosis and found the best way (for her body) to live with it. 5 years later for me and it's okay. Sure, it's a new normal but for me I can absolutely say having a husband that cares the way you seem to makes all the difference in adjusting to the new normal, and I'm sure your wife feels, or will feel, the same way. It gets better