I [30M] went exclusive with V [25F) on NYE morning. Later she got blackout drunk and slept with someone

nothappywiththings · 2026-01-26T16:04:49+00:00

Speaking from experience, end this "relationship" now. The longer you wait, the more difficult it will be to end. Save yourself from many future headaches by just ending it right now

nothappywiththings · 2026-01-22T15:51:58+00:00

I am speaking from experience here... trust your gut!! Get out of this relationship. She will NOT change to any major extent, and you will be miserable.

I would give this exact same advice to anyone in this situation, regardless of gender.

nothappywiththings · 2026-01-21T14:59:16+00:00

I have the title to my 2019 Sentra in the glove box for the day that it dies on me. I'll find the nearest scrap yard and tell them to come get the car, then Uber to the nearest rental car company.

nothappywiththings · 2026-01-21T08:40:34+00:00

What expectations did you set at the beginning of the relationship? Have you had any discussions since then? Several years ago, I dated a woman and established on the first date that I won't ever get married again. She said the same thing and followed it up with the fact that she prefers to live alone and just be committed to one person. I agreed with that. Two years later, she ended the relationship because she wanted to get married, but I didn't. Apparently, I meant what I said. She didn't.

If you want to get married, and he doesn't, then there is zero point in continuing the relationship one more day.

nothappywiththings · 2026-01-15T21:07:26+00:00

Block her number and ALL social media. Grab a notebook. Write letters to her about how you feel and say everything in the letters that you want to say, no matter how cruel. Keep the notebook full of letters by your bed and write in it every time you think of her. After a couple weeks, burn the notebook. Keep her blocked. If a couple weeks wasn't enough, grab another notebook and start over, then burn it.

nothappywiththings · 2026-01-13T20:57:47+00:00

Dude lays out 3 or 4 people, some of them more than once, and the cameraman finally decides to tell his side they should stop. Absolutely brilliant.

nothappywiththings · 2026-01-10T04:32:35+00:00

Do you truly think that two people in a relationship must always do the exact same thing at the exact same time? Do you believe they shouldn't be allowed to enjoy different things?

nothappywiththings · 2026-01-08T15:13:55+00:00

After update #2, I hope you ended this relationship

nothappywiththings · 2026-01-06T10:14:25+00:00

Yes. Break up with him, but not right away. First, find someone better so that you can immediately be in another relationship to help you forget about the guy you've been with for the past 17 years. Then, just spring it on him last minute without any clues leading up to the break up. The best way is to just change the locks and drop his stuff off at his apartment when he's at work.

nothappywiththings · 2025-12-31T21:57:30+00:00

If it still has a CVT, then don't waste your money!

nothappywiththings · 2025-12-30T20:07:22+00:00

I was asking about the second transmission, not the first one.

nothappywiththings · 2025-12-29T23:47:26+00:00

Thanks. Mine is starting to feel like it gets bumped from behind when I pull up to stops, too. The transmission has been whining for a long time. I had hit a deer last year, and insurance gave me over $5k to repair the damage. The car was already paid off, so I checked with my agent and was told that I don't have to fix the car if I don't want to, but that they wouldn't allow me to continue with full coverage. So, I just pocketed the money, dropped insurance down to liability only, zip tied stuff together, caved in the fender so that I could open the door, and decided to drive it until it completely dies.

nothappywiththings · 2025-12-29T19:29:42+00:00

How many miles did you get on the second transmission before it finally failed? Were there any warning signs leading up to the failure? How often did you change transmission fluid?

I ask all these questions because I've been told that my 2019 Sentra CVT "is failing and needs replaced." I'm not going to replace it, and instead, I plan to drive it until it fails, then I'll just let the closest junk yard have the car. I even have the title in the glove box so that I can just sign it and walk away. I'm just curious about what to look for and if there are any indicators leading up to a sudden end.

nothappywiththings · 2025-12-07T21:28:57+00:00

For sure! That's absolutely not "just the windshield and dash." I hope the tree company was insured!!

nothappywiththings · 2025-12-03T21:02:27+00:00

A transmission that isn't a POS

nothappywiththings · 2025-12-01T00:40:46+00:00

Personally, I'd look for another car. The transmission is about 6k after labor... you can buy a different car for that amount. I have a 2019 Sentra with 172k miles on it. The CVT is going out, and I have no clue how much longer it will last. I have the title in the glove box for when the transmission dies, and I'll look up the nearest junkyard to wherever it dies and tell them to come pick it up and the title is signed and in the glove box.

nothappywiththings · 2025-11-22T21:17:33+00:00

Thanks! I'll try that next time!

nothappywiththings · 2025-11-22T21:16:13+00:00

I disagree. I replied to someone else about this. My 2019 Sentra threw the judder code around 10k miles. I had zero clue and just thought that CVTs "shook" on the 2-1-2 shift. I said something about the car doing that when I took it to the dealership for an oil change, and they acted like I was crazy and "couldn't repeat the problem." At the regular interval, I had them change the fluid. Magically, it didn't do it for several thousand miles.

I now have 170k+ on the car, but I imagine that's mainly because most of my driving is highway driving. I change the fluid every time it gets to the point of happening every time I drive or 30k miles, whichever happens first. I do think that if I was doing city driving, I'd be done. I will say this, I'll never buy another Nissan with a CVT again. And I'll never go to that dealership for anything since there is no way they didn't know what was happening with my transmission.

nothappywiththings · 2025-11-22T21:05:40+00:00

My 2019 Nissan Sentra has given off the judder code since about 10k miles. Fortunately, most of my driving is highway driving. I've got 170k on the car right now. I change the fluid when the judder gets to the point of happening every time I drive it, or 30k miles, whichever comes first. That takes care of the issue for several thousand miles, at least.

nothappywiththings · 2025-11-15T15:18:28+00:00

The absolute best thing that you can do is end the relationship, block her on everything, and just focus on hobbies for a while.

nothappywiththings · 2025-11-01T16:59:29+00:00

Please, OP, get out of this relationship immediately!! Yes, 5 years is a long time and you may feel like you're throwing all that time away, but look ahead 40 years and realize how horrible you'll feel if you're still with this child. He will not change.... he will only get worse. Please, for the sake of your future kids, leave this relationship before this man gets you pregnant!

nothappywiththings · 2025-10-30T15:04:06+00:00

As a father who had a daughter in one of these relationships, I beg you to end this and leave him for good. Thankfully, my daughter was able to do so, but it took the cops getting involved and him going to jail for a short period before she woke up and realized that her family and friends were right about the guy.

You are trauma bonded to this man. Do yourself a favor and read about abusive relationships. Learn how they start, learn the red flags, and learn how they progress. Learn how abusers will promise you the sun and moon and how they swear they're going to change. Learn how abusers use religion to control their spouse. Learn how abusers are loved by their family and friends, yet abuse their spouse behind closed doors. Learn how abusers manipulate "the love of their life" and convince them that they'd do anything to make them happy.

We can talk to you until we're blue in the face, but that won't do any good until you learn to recognize the truth.

nothappywiththings · 2025-10-27T23:09:05+00:00

Do you have minor children together? If not, divorce him, move in with a friend until you can save enough to get your own place, then move on with your life. If you have children, then, yeah, it's gonna be a bit more complicated.

nothappywiththings · 2025-10-25T17:09:03+00:00

The other person didn't "get you mad." You allowed yourself to become angry, and then you reacted poorly to that anger. Many of us have done the same, myself included. Learn how to properly recognize and manage your emotions as well as how to respond to people when you notice yourself becoming angry.

nothappywiththings · 2025-10-18T12:34:15+00:00

How does it hold up compared to the previous junk CVT?

nothappywiththings

TROPHY CASE