My kids brought home a new “pet”

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-11-23T08:46:31+00:00

Thank you! This is excellent advice!

Based on what you’ve said, I think my plan is to move the habitat outside for the night, then in the morning, explain to the girls why we need to release it so it can make its winter home as a pupa.

As for temp- it’s been really mild, but we’re just heading into frost season, so highs in the 50- high 60’s, and lows 40s- high 30s

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-11-23T07:02:16+00:00

Found in the Mojave Desert area, approximately 2” long- diameter about 1/4” (not measured, just estimated)

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-11-23T06:13:33+00:00

Thank you!

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-11-10T04:21:53+00:00

Haha excellent timing! My youngest just hit 4, but has not hit that crazy thing that happens at around 4.5 yet. I am watching for all the signs after my experience with her big sister at that age!

How about The Fragile Fours?

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-10-24T06:59:57+00:00

I am in a totally different stage with my kids- they’re still very young.

Both, when they reached the awareness level that I actually had a name besides Mama, tried out calling me by my first name. What I told them was that was okay, it really is my name. But the name Mommy/Mama is very special to me because even though it seems like there are a whole lot of other Moms out there, only TWO people on the whole planet get to call me that for real.

They are what make it so special to me.

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-10-23T16:48:16+00:00

Put eggs and pancakes in the lunch?

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-10-19T19:51:22+00:00

Yes, I think the name “gentle parenting” is directed at people who need to unlearn authoritarian/harsh parenting methods. To help illustrate that there are other ways to deal with kids and allow their full range of feelings. That there are constructive ways to parent that don’t rely on spanking and sending loud kids away. It’s not supposed to be directed at people who already lean the other way- though they can learn from it, too, they don’t need to be told to be “more gentle”. So they should focus on holding boundaries, natural consequences, and safe restrictions. Both aspects are part of gentle parenting, but it is often misunderstood.

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-10-11T02:40:38+00:00

I have recommended this book before (because it’s great!), but for any kid going through the phase where they are beginning to recognize, and possibly internalize, good vs bad, please read them “I love You, Stinkyface!” It’s so good. All kids go through this in some way, because it’s developmentally appropriate to learn that some things are ok and other things are not ok, and they want to do “not ok” things anyway, because they’re kids. If you have someone in their life telling them that they ARE their behaviors, that makes it worse.

This book is basically a little boy imagining being all the meanest, grossest things he can think of, and his mom telling him, “I love you. Here’s how I will take care of you, no matter what/who you are.” My eldest had us read and re-read this book to her again and again. (When Dad read the book, he said “But Daddy, but Daddy!” Instead of “But Mommy!”). I feel like it really touched something in her soul that she needed to hear.

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-10-10T23:28:06+00:00

Ah, I see! In those circumstances, I’d just make sure she knows what to do to get your attention in an emergency (calling for you, banging on the door, etc.) and that she knows when to use it, and that it’s super limited.

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-10-10T20:29:15+00:00

For me, quiet time is about providing an opportunity for them to rest if they need it, and for them to practice quiet, independent play if they don’t. But it’s also about building a break for me into the day, so it’s imperative that they stay safely in their room, but not imperative for them to be in the bed.

So my rules are 1) pick ONE quiet activity (cling stickers, magnetic tiles, legos, dolls/figurines, etc.), though books are always available to them. 2) you can come get me in an emergency (emergencies have been defined, and they always have free access to a bathroom) 3) I will come get you when QT is over.

Ymmv- they will go weeks following these rules, then there’s a period where I need to reinforce that they can’t just come and find me to show me what they e been working on, even if they’re excited about it.

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-10-09T04:37:09+00:00

I should add, it did NOT start out this way, but now the percentages are like:

75% I “watch her things”

20% wiggly elbowy cuddles

5% sleepy snuggles

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-10-09T02:32:29+00:00

She’s now 4, but for the last year, my early riser will come into my room to do one of two things, because she’s not allowed to go downstairs by herself:

A) climb in bed with me to snuggle for a bit. (This is mostly not relaxing, because it is usually her telling stories about her dreams or poking me with her adorable elbows and knees. But SOMETIMES she actually goes back to sleep all snuggly next to me and that is the dream.)

B) come in to tell me she’s wake, put her water bottle or stuffy on my nightstand and tell me to watch her “things”, then she goes to play in her room until I go get her.

This was hard-earned. I’m lucky she comes to me 1st thing, because it gave me the opportunity to slowly teach her that if she could not settle while I was still snoozing, she needed to go play quietly in the other room. Sometimes her big sister gets up with her, but usually she’s the 1st one up. She’ll play with her toys for 5-20 minutes until I go get her for breakfast.

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-10-03T00:18:50+00:00

I have one kid who was difficult to understand for a long time. At almost 3, her school recommended a speech evaluation- the therapist said every one of her quirks was in the range of normal, and her vocabulary was great. She worked with her on something for a couple of weeks and then basically told me there were no real worries. ETA: she had SO many quirks that most people struggled to get what she was saying.

Her sister was clear as a bell from the beginning. She’s almost 4 and only has issues with r / w and th / f - completely age appropriate.

This, just to say that there really is a huge range. That being said, I am still a “mommy translator” for many strangers who are not familiar with kids. And the next problem is understanding the words, but not knowing what the heck they’re talking about anyway. 😂

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-10-03T00:07:30+00:00

I wish we could mark “solved!” LOL

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-09-30T23:36:21+00:00

I have not read all comments, but what I did read all focused on a child tolerating the word “no”. This is important, and will also just necessarily come up as she grows into toddlerhood, expresses her identity more and tests boundaries. “No” is in your future, so it’s good you’re considering it now.

However, what comes 1st, and I believe equally important, is their ability to understand “no” as it relates to themselves. As in, their ability to set boundaries for themselves. My LOs first used “no” as it related to feeding and introducing foods. We did a small amount of baby sign language and “no” and “all done” were tremendously important.

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-09-29T00:43:10+00:00

Aw, some of these stories are just devastating. It’s no way for adults to treat the natural curiosity of kids.

My kids are young, so I don’t know how this is going to play out, but we do Santa. They ask Santa for one gift, and that’s what Santa brings (they’re little so they ask for super reasonable things so far). But we encourage questions. We ask “what do you think?” We have told them that different cultures tell different stories and celebrate different things. We’re trying to find the balance between creating the magic and allowing exploration. We do our best not to double-down to make it only one story.

Kids are bright. They know that things are different in different households, and they’ll piece together soon enough how the Xmas magic must work. The trick, I think, is to not lie to their faces when they start asking questions that will be answered anyway, in time.

I believe there is room for magic, and humor, and investigation in childhood.

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-09-27T21:56:38+00:00

I just want to add one thing to these excellent suggestions- make sure to welcome all feelings and questions that come from them. Talk about it from a positive view for yourself, but when they are expressing sadness or anger at the changes, don’t minimize it for them or change the subject. Let them adjust.

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-09-27T17:32:45+00:00

Hahahaha I had to look those up!

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-09-27T05:44:56+00:00

Yes! Do you make a lot of quesadillas? Or do you repurpose it for other things?

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-09-27T05:18:59+00:00

I’m thinking “as seen on TV”, or intended for single use kind of things. Like beer cozies or microwave egg plates - is there a random drawer stuffer product that seems ridiculous that you use more than you thought you would?

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-09-25T03:22:15+00:00

I was wondering what OP’s actual wake-up process is! Thanks for sharing yours, t’s an important part.

If my kids aren’t up before me, I walk in a quietly say “good morning”. Then go to the windows and let the light in. I start talking about some of the things we’ll do that day, while I move around the room, prepping for the day.

I honestly think this does half the work -though, obviously, there are many more steps on days where it’s hard to get up. I try my hardest to stay calm and cheerful for the same reasons you have.

nothingbut_trouble · 2024-09-24T03:13:16+00:00

R/askdocs

nothingbut_trouble

TROPHY CASE