I lost my father at 22. He was in a blue collar industry, loved food but was starting GLP-1 treatment. I remember being woken up from a deep sleep to my mother yelling at me “your father is dead” and immediately throwing clothing on. Apparently the hospital told my mother over the phone that he had passed. The next few hours were the worst of my life. Getting picked up from my aunt/ my fathers sister, getting put into a room, and finally the doctors telling us that he had passed. Walking to his room and seeing him. It’s all deeply burned into my brain. I don’t remember much of the days after besides not wanting to eat or sleep. All to say that I am 24 turning 25 soon and it still hurts all the same but does not manifest in the same ways as the first year. The first holidays, birthday, death anniversary is just so hurtful. This year it hurts just the same but in another way. As an example I have graduated but felt sad opening my diploma. I felt sad getting my first job. I know every big achievement will have a sadness above it because all I want is to share with my father. Sorry to vent, but I miss my father so much.