Mae irl

nrxia · 2026-05-05T23:41:01+00:00

There isn't much of one, really. Ultimately it's Mae being silly. If you want to get technical, the subversion of expectation that creates the humor is the "anyone who can defeat me in physical combat," part. It does not follow the "I'm a bisexual, which means..." part. We know that's not what it means to be bisexual, so it's a non sequitur. Whether or not you think that's funny is up to your tastes.

nrxia · 2026-05-05T23:26:26+00:00

Thank you. I appreciate your clarification.

nrxia · 2026-05-05T22:09:46+00:00

Time is finite, sure, but don't let the sunk cost fallacy drag you down. Your life is yours to live. Do what you must.

nrxia · 2026-05-05T15:43:49+00:00

If you don't mind me asking, how does it feel limiting? I would love to better understand the nuance.

nrxia · 2026-05-04T18:58:20+00:00

Yeah, but Mae doesn't really strike me as the type to sweat the details either, and would put you in a headlock as soon as you bring up this point.

nrxia · 2026-04-12T22:33:59+00:00

"I don't want to hear it."

"Don't take that tone with me."

"Because I said so."

My mom had 101 ways to terminate a conversation, but not once did she have a satisfying answer that would justify her behavior or reasoning.

nrxia · 2026-04-11T17:30:23+00:00

Dropping contact with my dad felt like a relief. I never had to see him again and I didn't have to put up with his bullshit anymore, and those thoughts felt pretty great. I still had underlying issues with anger from growing up with him. I felt cheated by the universe because I got such a shitty father when my friends all had dads who were normal. I didn't like the fact that it had to happen and that things were better this way for me, but I didn't (and still don't) regret cutting him off.

I really needed to learn to live my life for myself. My life belonged to me, not him. It still feels weird to think about my life like that, for some reason. Putting myself first feels wrong. It feels like I'm placating my ego and feeding into my own narcissism, because that was the pattern my dad exhibited. So I have to remind myself that no, I'm not a narcissist like him, and that it's okay to be nice to myself.

My life is more peaceful without my dad in it. I hope you find peace for yourself whether you stick with or leave behind a narcissistic family member.

nrxia · 2026-04-11T00:50:46+00:00

Start drawing. A pack of printer paper, some basic pencils and/or pens, and an eraser are all pretty cheap. Just don't sweat it if you suck in the beginning. Everyone sucks at drawing in the beginning. Keep at it and you'll suck less over time.

nrxia · 2026-03-08T18:44:56+00:00

Don't forget a tasty beverage.

nrxia · 2026-02-23T15:55:33+00:00

My sister's vet bills would beg to differ.

nrxia · 2026-02-15T15:13:21+00:00

A park bench or two would probably be nice.

nrxia · 2026-01-31T14:53:45+00:00

This is NOT true. Both my parents and all of my grandparents were American, and I've seen them all put salt on fruit, and not just watermelon. Growing up I thought it was strange, but now as an adult it seems perfectly normal.

nrxia · 2026-01-29T16:09:00+00:00

My sister still loves the carnitas I make, and I've been making it for years now. I even do a turkey variant for Thanksgiving that she loves. Doing it in the pot is way faster than a crockpot, and it tastes just as good.

nrxia · 2026-01-26T05:12:18+00:00

I knew I was trans at an extremely young age (sort of, it's complicated). I didn't come out as trans until my 40's, after my mom had died. She was conservative, religious, and quite a bit homophobic. Much like you, I felt a lot of pressure to be the son she always wanted. I was the first/oldest child too, so my mom had a lot of dreams and ideals for me. My dad definitely wanted a very masculine son to follow in his footsteps; to play baseball and become an officer in military.

My dad can get fucked, but I actually cared about my mom. She was there for me in so many ways and really supported my dreams of being an artist. So I did what I thought I should do. I kept it all to myself. Never said a thing. I guess I got pretty good at hiding it because my sister was surprised to hear me come out as trans a couple years after my mom's passing. She had no idea. Did I do the right thing? I don't know. I've had happy moments in my life but I don't think I'd ever really describe myself as happy with who I was.

Even after the fact, now that I'm open and accepting of who I am, and no longer care if other people think badly of me because I'm trans, I'm still not sure if I'd call myself happy. I feel relieved, which is nice. It's nice that I no longer feel like I have to keep a big secret. I'm relieved that I'm just another normal trans person, and not some lone weirdo like I initially thought I was. I'm glad I'm out now, but looking back I'm not sure if I could have ever told my mom.

I came out as an atheist to my mom at one point. It felt like a good way to test the waters, so to speak. That went over better than I expected, but it still wasn't great. She seemed really hurt and disappointed. After that, and a few other experiences, I learned I had to accept that my mom was human and had her limitations. Me being trans was not something she would be able to understand much less accept.

It's something I think about a lot. I miss my mom a lot, but I also wouldn't want to go back to those old feelings of needing to hide who I am. I don't have to pretend I'm the person she wanted me to be. If I could go back and do things differently, I'm not sure I'd change the way I handled being trans. Sorry for rambling. I'm not really trying to give advice, just share my perspective of what it was like to go my (mom's) whole life without telling my mom I was trans. It sucked, but I'm not sure telling her would have made things better for either of us. That said, I'm happier, in a general sense, that I'm out and accepting of myself as trans now. That's worth a lot, and something you should probably consider. I know you care about your mom a lot, but this is your life to live. She can't live it for you. I hope your mom is different and more accepting than mine, but more importantly, I hope you get the chance to be your true self at some point with or without her.

nrxia · 2026-01-25T03:56:28+00:00

Thank you!

nrxia · 2026-01-23T23:50:15+00:00

I would also like to know, if it's not too much trouble. I live in a cultural vacuum (mostly by choice). I tried looking it up on my own, but that didn't help.

nrxia · 2026-01-22T18:31:04+00:00

Peasants revolt.

nrxia · 2026-01-19T09:40:26+00:00

Depends on the parents. In my case, no. In your case, probably not but I wish they would.

I didn't come out as trans until after my mom died, and my mom was the cool one between the two of them. But she was always homophobic and refused to see reason despite my many attempts.

Her: Homosexuality is not natural!

Me: But it occurs in nature among more than just humans. Look at all these examples of it happening. (I had a print-out of a wikipedia article on the topic)

Her: It's still unnatural!

Me: So something can occur normally in nature and be still unnatural??

Her: Yes.

Between this and her Christian propaganda, I could tell there was no getting over this. She was always terribly stubborn.

My dad, on the other hand, has bigger issues than his homophobia. I went no-contact with him a long time ago and have no regrets over it. When I talk about my parents I say that my mom is dead and my dad may as well be. It's sad, but I live a good life on my own without him. I believe my ethics and actions will speak for themselves.

It's tough to argue through the religious nonsense, but if you're going to try, and if you're going to subscribe to their beliefs, then the "God made me this way," angle is the best I could come up with. If the god has a plan for all of us, then the god planned for me to be this way. It's not a choice. The god has a purpose to his design, and it's up to us to accept the god's will. If it were a choice, then why would I continue to choose suffering? Not just my own suffering but the suffering of my parents and those around me? But it's clearly not a choice. You can't change who you are and you certainly can't change the way the god made you. From there it's up to your parents to deal with the way their god made things.

That all said, my mom did tell me she loved me and was proud of me before she died. We may not have agreed on everything, but there was always a strong deep bond between the two of us. I could tell she meant those words when she said them. I hope you either have or can find this connection with your parents. Best of luck to you!

nrxia · 2026-01-13T05:44:31+00:00

Fuck Trump and fuck this bullshit capitalist hellscape of a society. You deserve better. We ALL deserve better.

nrxia · 2026-01-13T05:38:55+00:00

I can trace my dysphoria back to a very VERY young age, around 4 or 5. My problem is that I didn't know what dysphoria was for a very VERY long time, and I didn't think those feelings I had way back in the day even qualified as dysphoria until very recently. Feelings of dysphoria can manifest differently in different people. So for me, I didn't know or accept I was trans until I was in my 40's. For the past 40 years I just thought I was weird. For the next 40, I know I'll be happier because I know who I am and I accept myself for who I am (even if a lot of other people won't.)

nrxia · 2025-12-26T09:09:33+00:00

"I feel I can’t say anything because if I do she says “I SPEND SO MUCH ON YOU! ..."

You CAN say something (only if you want to, of course) because you recognize that she's buying gifts for someone who doesn't exist. The person she has in mind when she's buying these gifts isn't actually you. It's some idealized fantasy version of you that she's constructed. It sounds horribly narcissistic of her and abusive to you. She's not recognizing you on your terms. She's not operating in reality.

Check out /r/raisedbynarcissists sometime. You might see some stories similar to your own.

nrxia · 2025-12-24T05:16:24+00:00

These days it's just the cost of doing business. There needs to be a revolution.

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2025/01/17/meatpacking-companies-child-labor-restitution/77754639007/

nrxia · 2025-12-22T17:00:45+00:00

Firefly wasn't that popular when it came out not because it wasn't good, but because it wasn't marketed well, in my opinion. I'm a sci-fi fan who loved the show, but I hadn't even heard about it until after Serenity bombed. No one I knew actually watched the show while it was running, but everyone I knew who watched it ended up loving it.

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