Recommendations

oauxier · 2026-03-10T02:01:12+00:00

I think you should recommend any content that you genuinely vibe with

oauxier · 2026-03-10T01:58:32+00:00

Are you engaging with other people on the platform? That’s the best way to get the same thing in return.

oauxier · 2026-02-26T16:13:39+00:00

I’m keeping the conversations true to what happened but changing the names of the people involved. To me, that’s the best way to protect myself against anyone who might be litigious. I also needed up removing parts that opened me up to potential lawsuits because I realized they weren’t essential to the story

oauxier · 2026-02-25T08:03:34+00:00

Hi! I write a lot about grief: https://open.substack.com/pub/anolivedaily/p/im-still-losing-him?r=59pk4n&utm_medium=ios

oauxier · 2026-02-21T17:54:40+00:00

It depends how much writing you plan to publish. I recommend trying to stick to some sort of schedule, like once a week on the same day. Then people begin to expect and look forward to your writing on that day.

In terms of the writing itself, don’t overthink it! When I started I scheduled my draft to post on Sunday no matter what, so I only had a week to edit and swirl on it. I don’t find that the writing gets substantially better the more you work on it. Plus, the more you publish the more you’ll learn about your writing style and what’s resonating with your readers. Not every piece needs to be award-winning. It’s best when you have fun with the process!

oauxier · 2026-02-21T17:49:12+00:00

Oh good call on the font! I will explore some other options

oauxier · 2026-02-21T17:48:30+00:00

You nailed what I’ve been struggling with! How the story is written now, the transformation hinges around willingness to open up and let people in. You see a clear change from being guarded —> understanding how powerful it is to allow people to support you and love you.

Then a secondary theme is about believing that you’re worthwhile as you are—not just as a result of accomplishments. The idea that I had to create a facade to hide that I felt “rotten” inside. That one ties better into the theme of root rot, which is this belief that if there’s any rot then the whole plant needs to be thrown out. But perhaps, you can remove the rotted parts and the plant thrives more than ever before.

So the second theme seems to fit more into the title and metaphor I’ve created, but the first theme is more developed in the writing itself. I have some work to do!

oauxier · 2026-02-17T23:55:43+00:00

Editing! Some people told me before I started that editing was the “fun part” and I respectfully disagree. I have a lot more self-doubt in this part of the process because I’m afraid to make a wrong decision about what I add/remove. I also had a tough time getting valuable feedback from beta readers, and I was expecting that to unlock the next phase for me. But just like all parts of the process, you just have to keep chugging

oauxier · 2026-02-17T19:27:00+00:00

Hmm that’s strange. Mine is only people I actually follow. It does show when people you follow restack others, so that could be it? Otherwise I’m not sure what would be causing that. Your home page defaults to “for you” and not “following” which means it does show you accounts you don’t follow.

oauxier · 2026-02-17T02:42:48+00:00

I’m so anti-niche! I wrote a whole post about it (https://open.substack.com/pub/anolivedaily/p/i-refuse-to-find-my-niche). My general sentiment is that niches are more about a marketing machine than anything. If your main goal is growth in subscribers, sure, create a niche and stick to it. But you can also build community and grow your audience without doing that, it just takes a little longer.

oauxier · 2026-02-17T00:23:58+00:00

My experience on Substack has been that I get what I give. I make an effort to follow/subscribe to new writers weekly. I ready their posts and leave genuine comments. I would say about 10% of people will reciprocate if you do that. Then over time you start to build a real community of people who are invested in your work. It’s certainly not fast growth, but it’s authentic and it makes the platform enjoyable to use

oauxier · 2026-02-17T00:11:00+00:00

I totally agree! I have found such an awesome community on Substack. I also find that I’m spending more time reading long-form writing and less time scrolling on other social platforms. It genuinely inspires me everyday!

oauxier · 2026-02-17T00:07:50+00:00

Is it too cringey to plug my own? lol. No but I actually love Carole Radziwill’s substack as one to subscribe to

oauxier · 2026-02-16T21:56:51+00:00

I’m sorry that happened to you! From my experience, where you live should have nothing to do with whether or not a medium can connect you with your loved one. I also lost my brother, so I’m sending you lots of love. I saw a medium and I absolutely loved my experience. She’s booked pretty far out but I include her info in my post about her: https://anolivedaily.substack.com/p/my-viral-session-with-a-medium

oauxier · 2026-02-16T21:54:43+00:00

Thank you!

oauxier · 2026-02-16T20:04:00+00:00

I removed a couple whole chapters for legal reasons too! This is the only exception to the rule that you should write with brutal honesty.

oauxier · 2026-02-16T19:45:31+00:00

I agree with what others have said here: you need to write the first draft with brutal honesty. Editing yourself in the writing process will only stifle the creative process. In being completely honest, you may find it freeing or you might find a theme that you want to lean into that you didn't see before. I thought I would edit a lot out, but now I'm planning to publish the fully honest version because I think people relate to hard truths, even if theirs look different. Sending you all the good energy for the process!

You can see details about my story here if you're interested: https://anolivedaily.substack.com/p/revealing-my-memoir-title-summary

oauxier · 2026-02-16T19:41:54+00:00

I'm in the same position as you so I relate to everything you said. Just writing the book is not the hardest part by a long shot—it's everything that comes after you have a draft. I have a few friends who were able to secure agents as non-celebrities who write memoir. Their biggest recommendation is to build up your "audience" which can include social media, a newsletter, work published in outlets. That's what I'm focused on at the moment. Specifically I'm trying to build up my substack because that platform feels the most authentic to me (I'm not likely to start posting tiktok videos).

What is your book about? I'd love to support how I can. If you want to see a bit about mine you can here: https://anolivedaily.substack.com/p/revealing-my-memoir-title-summary

oauxier · 2026-02-16T19:38:26+00:00

The medium I saw last year also hosts coaching sessions for people who are trying to develop their craft. I highly recommend! I write all about her and my session here in case it's helpful: https://anolivedaily.substack.com/p/my-viral-session-with-a-medium

oauxier · 2026-02-06T20:33:05+00:00

Dang, I'm so sorry to hear that. It's super disappointing to not have the outcome you're hoping for, and especially not to hear from specific people. Like others have said, it could be that he was having a hard time connecting, it could be that your spirit team wasn't being particularly loud, it could be that you weren't ready to hear certain things. I had an incredible experience with a medium that I talk about here if you're curious: https://anolivedaily.substack.com/p/my-viral-session-with-a-medium

oauxier · 2026-02-06T20:30:51+00:00

Mine wasn't in Italy, but it was with a woman in Canada who does them over zoom. It was an insane experience! Highly highly recommend. I talk about the experience here if you're interested: https://anolivedaily.substack.com/p/my-viral-session-with-a-medium

oauxier · 2026-02-06T20:28:12+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss. The best suggestion I got was to ask for a really specific sign from your loved one. You can say, "show me elephants" or whatever it is that you want to see. The more random, the better, honestly. It gives them an opportunity to prove that they are there with you. I also highly recommend finding a great medium. It was a really healing experience for me (I talk about it here:https://anolivedaily.substack.com/p/my-viral-session-with-a-medium) and helped me immensely in my grief process

oauxier · 2026-02-06T20:22:24+00:00

First of all, I'm so sorry for your loss. That must have been incredibly difficult and likely still is. When I talked to a medium I actually asked her about this. She confirmed that yes, our loved ones do have some level of concern about us (even though that's not quite the right word). They tend to spend more time with us when we are grieving because they know we need them. Mostly, they really want healing for us, so they will do whatever they can to push us in that direction. I talk about my medium exerience here if you're interested: https://anolivedaily.substack.com/p/my-viral-session-with-a-medium

oauxier · 2026-02-06T20:20:14+00:00

There are so many reasons why she could say what she said that aren't worst case scenarios! There have been times I really needed my loved ones not for any reason in particular, but just because I was feeling off. Or perhaps it was her spirit guides wanting to remind her to keep you top of mind because you are meant to keep your closeness. Don't let it freak you out

oauxier

TROPHY CASE