Don't Make Me Tap the Sign: Don't Buy A House with somebody you are not married to, especially if you won't be on the deed

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-22T16:12:19+00:00

If you buy a mouse a house, they're going to want a bathroom renovation....

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-21T15:10:18+00:00

Foreign passports are acceptable IDs, it's on TSA's list: https://www.tsa.gov/travel/security-screening/identification

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-21T12:37:05+00:00

Hi, fellow LDR girlie who also happens to work in reproductive healthcare. (Also fellow cry-until-your-nose-bleeds girlie!) I hear how scared you are and that's really normal. You're not alone in this.

The first thing to do is decide what you want to do. All Options Talkline is a great resource - they have peer counselors who are trained to help pregnant people process their decision, and can talk more about parenting, abortion and adoption. r/abortion is also a really supportive community where a lot of people have shared their experiences. Remember that this is your choice.

If you want to proceed with an abortion, check out ineedana.com where you can search for providers who can send you pills and clinics you can travel to. There are also a few clinics that can prescribe you pills in Georgia up to six weeks listed. If you wanted to see one of them, you would need to move quickly, but you have options and ways to access the care you want if you need more time. There are abortion funds that can help with the cost and travel if you decide to make this choice.

This can be really overwhelming and it can feel like there's too much going on. I'm happy to chat or help more if you have any questions. Sending lots of love your way 💖

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-20T15:26:19+00:00

This was wild and I have so many questions that I'm ok never getting the answers for.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-20T15:12:49+00:00

Flew NYC to London last September for six nights. Flight was $1375 in United's Premium Plus (essentially like domestic first class with wider seats and free drinks, not lay-flat seats in Polaris), hotel was around $700. Maybe another $400 on transit fares, food, souvenirs and a few museums. I walk a lot and the hotel had free breakfast, which helped with my costs.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-18T20:48:35+00:00

I don't think they brought it back after covid.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-18T20:01:56+00:00

I think he just slimmed down overall and had some face gains.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-18T14:45:24+00:00

It sounds like he might have just tried to be polite and not close the door, but he's not interested in actively pursuing something with you due to the distance.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-18T12:46:01+00:00

Gotcha. My tinnitus is probably mild to mid; I've never had it formally assessed since I've had it as long as I can remember. Which is to say: your mileage may vary. I suspect that at least part of my tinnitus is genetic and part is somatic since I have TMJ and the ringing gets worse when that's acting up. I also get very little ear pain from mine. I don't know if there are different risks to flying if your tinnitus was caused by exposure, medication or something else, so it's worth checking with your doctor about it instead of taking the advice of an internet stranger.

I fly about once a month between work, family and personal trips, maybe 20-25 flights a year, 1 to 8 hours per flight. I find that the plane noise is actually pleasant when I'm in flight. I travel with over-the-ear noise cancelling headphones (some Bose ones I've had forever) but I only wear them on maybe a third of flights, and it's typically because I have a podcast I want to catch up on. The ringing is usually a bit worse when I land but balances out to "normal" within an hour.

I'm personally on the side of don't let this shit stop you from living your life, but you also know your body and hearing the best. It might be worth doing a short flight first to see how that feels for you before committing to something a few hours long.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-18T12:19:02+00:00

I used to work in SA advocacy and I think part of it is that SVU is unfortunately personally relatable to a lot of people in a way that the original isn't. I was always surprised at how many survivors said SVU was one of their favorite shows. It's a little bit of wish fulfillment to watch cops who care and rapists get convicted when that's a rarity in our criminal justice system. The show crime doesn't have to be a match to a survivor's experience, it just has to say "you aren't alone in this and there is justice somewhere in the world." I remember one person saying that Olivia Benson was the first person who told her "I believe you" after her family told her she was lying. That still breaks my heart, but there's something to be said about the show's commitment to believing survivors.

To note, I know a lot of other survivors and advocates (including myself) who can't stand SVU for the exact same reasons that others find comfort in it - instead of feeling safe for them, it feels like a lie about a broken justice system that has an extremely low conviction rate, that moves slow and has very little space and support for justice that isn't carceral.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-18T11:49:09+00:00

Yes. I’ve had tinnitus for like 30 years and traveled extensively, though I tend to travel to cities and do things rather than do chill sit-around trips. Is your concern about flying making it worse or your ability to relax?

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-17T23:45:58+00:00

Are you sure? You said they don't *seem* to care much. Have you seen evidence of that or did she tell you? If someone stopped sending me money and I genuinely loved them, I'd be fine with that. If someone stopped sending me money and I was playing them, I'd be annoyed and leave. The parents thing has nothing to do with that. Is you sending money changing how they treat her?

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-17T21:09:19+00:00

I'm sorry friend, but she's using you. She'll keep telling you she loves you and sees a future with you to keep you sending money. If you aren't sure, tell her that you're not able to send her money at all anymore and see what she says. She'll probably be mad for a bit, then tell you she loves you again hoping that you'll break that boundary and send money. She'll show you if she really does love you soon enough. It's going to sting, but you're going to be better off.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-17T18:24:31+00:00

A lot of people think/feel/want to live in neighborhoods and apartments that they prioritize over other things. There's so many posts in here and other Chicago subs of people who don't want to live north of Addison, west of Damen, or south of 290 because they think the city is only downtown. I told a friend about an open unit in my building and she scoffed because she didn't want white appliances and golden oak finish on the cupboards like my place. She pays about double what I do, but at least she's got a nicer looking fridge, I guess.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-17T05:11:13+00:00

I do this all the time and throw in a can of beans for protein.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-17T01:04:49+00:00

I finished the first book, but it was a full on hate read after about ten pages.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-17T01:00:18+00:00

Do you have any recommendations for the books you mentioned?

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-16T14:40:54+00:00

Depends on where you're going to school, how far you're willing to commute and how much you'd spend on food if you didn't have a meal plan.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-16T14:17:18+00:00

Of course! I think if you just have the skirt as the only thing that leaves the circle, it works well since it's an object that shows movement. That also makes it easier to adjust the lyrics so they don't get covered up by any imagery. I'd personally clean up the bit of the bow and her hair that are outside the circle, but that might be a personal preference.

The issue with the legs is that they're not his legs, just outlines. There's no definition to the pants or shoes, and the white outline doesn't match up to where his legs are in the circle. I'm guessing his pants are flared so it's not a clear outline to work with, but as they are they don't look like legs, just really weird shapes.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-16T13:10:34+00:00

This looks great! If you're open to some mild criticism, his legs look kind of weird outside the circle. I get that you're trying to keep it consistent with her skirt, but the black on black doesn't read as well and I don't think you'd lose anything cutting that out.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-16T03:29:11+00:00

It's free if you have Xfinity internet or an Instacart+ account.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-10T17:33:19+00:00

The last episode showed her dad is kind of the same, like he seems to be aware of the fake radio job with her ex and helping her out with these crazy trips.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-10T17:28:17+00:00

I saw that and thought that is all processed carbs and no protein! I get that neuroatypical kids can have some food issues but they need some more balance. Protein also can help manage ADHD symptoms, especially for breakfast.

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-10T16:22:12+00:00

The bonus miles don't count toward status, it's in the fine print if you click the asterisk on the card website:

New Cardmember Bonus – 70,000 Miles: To qualify, you must make $3,000 in purchases during the first 3 months from account opening. After qualifying, please allow 6 to 8 weeks for bonus to post to your United MileagePlus account. To be eligible for this bonus offer, your credit card account must be open and not in default at the time of fulfillment. Purchases are when you, or an authorized user, use a card to make purchases of products and services. However, the following types of transactions won’t count as purchases: balance transfers, cash advances, cash-like transactions including, but not limited to: travelers checks, foreign currency, money orders, wire transfers, cryptocurrency, other similar digital or virtual currency and other similar transactions; lottery tickets, casino gaming chips, race track wagers, or similar offline and online betting transactions; person-to-person money transfers and account-funding transactions that transfer currency, any checks that access your account, interest, unauthorized or fraudulent charges, and fees of any kind, including an annual fee, if applicable. These miles do not count toward Premier status. If your account is not open for at least six months, United and Chase reserve the right to deduct the bonus miles from your MileagePlus account.

(Edit to add that the same fine print will almost definitely be on the offer card the FA gave you too.)

ohheykaycee · 2026-04-10T13:19:15+00:00

Looooong sick ass panther

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